The Battle for the Sandwich

[Szeth's Facepalm]

I dive down from the sky where i have been hovering and use my lasso to snatch the sandwich from the muddy hole. 

[The Isochronism he/him]

I use selective and borderline magical magnets to pull you down from the sky using the metal in your body. I take the sandwich and escape via the night.

[Szeth's Facepalm]

i eat the night and take the sandwich from you.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Facepalm is immediately arrested for eating the night. I am a investigator on the scene, and I take the sandwich as evidense.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

Forensics investigates the sandwich. Sequence forgot to wear gloves and got fingerprints all over everything and is arrested. I am hired in her place, and take the sandwich with gloves.

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

I come in as the detective from the past and arrest Keys for having a punny name.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I arrest Wizard for not bolding his post. I get the sandwich.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

I arrest Nerdy because I feel like it, then make the sandwich into a scepter and rule unchallenged for a thousand years.

[Mr. Misting he/him]

Me and ragtag group of skaa peasants overthrow Haly's rule. I steal the scepter and remove the sandwich from the aforementioned scepter. 

Edited November 13, 2022 by Mr. Misting

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

2 minutes ago, Mr. Misting said:

Me and ragtag group of skaa peasants overthrow Haly's rule. I steal the scepter and remove the sandwich from the aforementioned scepter. 

I shrug and give them all my gold, happy to have had the sandwich for a time. “I’m going to head over to Alaska. I forgot something there.”

[Mr. Misting he/him]

I shrug back and prepare a light appetizer to go with my sandwich. It is a caeser salad with pretzels as a side. I prepare bright violet fizzy water to finish my meal. In slow motion I begin to move the sandwich towards my mouth.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

1 minute ago, Mr. Misting said:

I shrug back and prepare a light appetizer to go with my sandwich. It is a caeser salad with pretzels as a side. I prepare bright violet fizzy water to finish my meal. In slow motion I begin to move the sandwich towards my mouth.

I appear again. “CAN I HAVE SOME SALAD? ILL GIVE YOU A RYTHOLONIAN VESTING PENDANT”

[Mr. Misting he/him]

I pause and put THE SANDWICH down. "What is a, and I quote, "a Rytholnian vesting pendant?"

[Cinnamon]

I run in and knock the violet fizzy water in Haly and Mr Misting’s faces causing him to drop the sandwich. 

Edited November 13, 2022 by Cinnamon
Ninja’d

[Primeival Chaos he/him]

Little did you know, I used my Shapeshifter Transmogrifier 3000 to transform into the violet fizzy water. I reform into my normal self and set my transmogrifier to sandwich mode. Everything that I shoot with it turns into a duplicate sandwich, leaving me to take the actual sandwich and run while everyone else is scrambling for decoy sandwiches

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

I come back as a giant python and I swallow you and walk away with the sandwich.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Pythons usually do not walk, so I break out prison to arrest you for breaking the laws of nature. I use gloves this time, and take the sandwich. I also disable all nearby cameras

Edited November 13, 2022 by Sequence

[Primeival Chaos he/him]

When you try to arrest him, I shoot out from his mouth, grabbing the sandwich from you. I then arrest Sequence for tampering with the governmental cameras and arrest Wizard for assault and swallowing of a person

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

However I arrest you all for coming onto my private property and I slither home thinking about my delicious sandwich.

[The Isochronism he/him]

You are all arresting people without following the proper parliamentary procedure. Everyone who was arrested is now free due to my insane lawyer skills. I then obtain an arrest warrant, using probable cause and witness testimony, then I read Wandering Wizard his rights, and send an officer of the law to handcuff him. I take the sandwich and submit it to evidence. Little do the officers know, it was actually one of the decoy sandwiches from Primeval Chaos' transmogrifier, and I take the real sandwich for my own personal connection. 

Edited November 13, 2022 by Bondsmith-Edgedancer

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I hire Ishar to remove your Connection to the sandwich. Ishar then Connects the sandwich to me!

[Primeival Chaos he/him]

However, Ishar is famously unreliable in the Connection department. Actually, he is unreliable in every department. He ends up Connecting the sandwich to me instead!

[Telrao she/her]

*cackling* I'm BACK

While Primeval Chaos is busy trying to get his Connection to work, I enter the Cognitive Realm and intercept the sandwich, sneefing gleefully as I re-enter the physical realm in Australia. No one knows where it is, 'cause apparently Australia doesn't exist. I sneef again, ecstatic.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

20 hours ago, Mr. Misting said:

I pause and put THE SANDWICH down. "What is a, and I quote, "a Rytholnian vesting pendant?"

“It gives you the ability to use tiny rocks to fuel magic spells!” Pulls out a small black iron round cage with only three bands (cage is barely smaller than a baseball) and a blue glow inside “Like this one.”

[The Isochronism he/him]

I morph into a unicorn which also doesn't exist, so abstractly me and Telrao are in the same place. I proceed to confiscate the sandwich. And cast a spell which protects me from monocles. Just in case.