Inverse Ask Anyone Anything

[NameIess]

Why did you beat your brother to death with a piano?

 

Hey, check out my new rolex! Gold-platinum plated.

[Nathrangking he/him]

Did you steal that?

The story of a lifetime

[Condensation she/her]

What do you use to determine who gets sacrificed to the dragon?

No. I refuse, that's not even possible! No! Not okay!

[Spren of Kindness she/her]

Well sir, I think they want to crown the captain king.

There's a satisfaction to it, you know.

[Condensation she/her]

Why do you read books upside-down?

Drawing dragons, either that or reading books about cats.

[Nathrangking he/him]

What do you do on a long summer day?

Read that very carefully

[Eluvianii he/him]

Sir, you just got a message. I think it's a list of cats you can choose to adopt?

Ah, that's a story I've waited a lifetime to tell. It all started when I got stranded in a gun shop for six months at age 5.

[Spren of Kindness she/her]

So... you named the machine gun?

Well men, the only thing we have is our honor, our pride, and the six month old corpse in the basement.

Edited August 26, 2020 by Spren of Kindness

[Condensation she/her]

What would you say if asked to lead a platoon into battle against space pirates?

Actually, whiteboard markers work really well for that!

[dannnex male]

Would you, hypothetically, know a good way to remove or mask fingerprints on a corpse? 

Well, I’d have to say......Bigfoot. Definitely Bigfoot. 

[Condensation she/her]

Who is your dream wife/husband?

My third badge in First Aid.

[theTruthshaper]

32 minutes ago, Condensation said:

Who is your dream wife/husband?

My third badge in First Aid.

Whoa.. what did you use to kill her?

It's my favorite food.

[Condensation she/her]

Do you enjoy vampire flesh?

I find it repulsive, and would never consider having anything to do with it.

[theTruthshaper]

1 minute ago, Condensation said:

I find it repulsive, and would never consider having anything to do with it.

What's your opinion on the Way of Kings?

That's what I enjoy most about it!

[Condensation she/her]

1 minute ago, The_Truthwatcher said:

What's your opinion on the Way of Kings?

That's what I enjoy most about it!

 How could you?

Do you disagree with the first Ideal of the Knights Radiant?

Mmmmmmmaybe.

[Illwei]

Uh, was it you I saw in the kitchen at 2 in the morning eating shredded cheese out of the bag by the spoonful?

Like Anchovies, but without the whole *fish* part

[dannnex male]

Describe your physical appearance as best you can. 

Well, yeah, I did that, but you should’ve seen what I did with the spatulas afterwards. 

[Nathrangking he/him]

Wait, you can cook?

Chimney sweeps dance a jig.

Edited August 26, 2020 by Nathrangking

[Channelknight Fadran]

What was your favorite part of the last Avengers movie?

 

Like someone just spooned out my eye and used it for a pincushion.

[ElectrumSavant he/him]

How was your date?

And it turned out, it was in my pocket the whole time!

[Eluvianii he/him]

So I understand you lost the nuclear missile switch during the meeting.

See, that's the funny thing about bunnies. You don't want to give them a chance to strike.

[Spren of Kindness she/her]

A rabbit did this to you?!

No sir, all we saw was a crow with a bomb.

[Scarletfox]

Did you not see the thirty machine gun toting pigeons descending on the crowd??

Under the circumstances, I would have rather locked myself into a refrigerator with sixteen crazed marmots.

[Illwei]

So, how do you think dinner with your parents went?

Home depot

[Eluvianii he/him]

That was really impressive. I assume you've received special training? Please, do tell me where.

If I had to describe that, I'd say it was like swallowing a pack of hungry wolves covered in tartar sauce.

Edited August 26, 2020 by Eluvianii