The Battle for the Sandwich

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

However, I am not a VOID creature, so the Delicate Flower does nothing to me! I use my Pernicious Pachyderm Pals to stampede down Witless though the tunnel made by his giant mole beast. I take the sandwich while Witless is staring at the stampede of elephants with sheep disguises.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

Several hundred wolves in Pachyderm disguises appeared.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Sadly, they all were killed by ivory poachers. Very disappointed ivory poachers. Meanwhile, Nerdy is stopped by the authorities while trying to cross the American-Canadian border. They detain Nerdy for being in possession of the Sandwich, which is given to me after Nerdy is locked in prison.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I get out of detention after showing my passport, and then use These words are censored These words are censored These words are censored These words are censored These words are censored These words are censored to reclaim the sandwich, now with my additional army of These words are censored.

[Edema Rue she/her]

A caterpillar appeared and made a nest in the sandwich.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

The caterpillar became omnipotent.

[Edema Rue she/her]

It decided to take a nap in the sandwich, enjoying the leafy smell.

[Immortal Platypus]

"The time has come... For a PLOT TWIST!!!" a voice boomed from the sky. The Sandwich duplicated into 17,000 sandwiches and 1 Sandwich. As everyone searches for The Sandwich, I laugh from the heavens, for of course, only I have The Sandwich.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

However, as this breaks the rules, the sandwich reverts to its previous state, in my hand.

[Wittles he/him]

I run by, enhanced by the power of ostrich, and do a cool flip over nerdy, slap the sandwich out of their hands and grab it and run

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I open a sandwich-only portal in front of Witless and reclaim the sandwich.

[Wittles he/him]

I use my ostrich powers to dig my head into the ground and pop out where Nerdy is and steal the sandwich back. I go back underground and pop up in an undisclosed location

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I use the ambiguity of that statement to fuel my ambiguity reactor, teleporting the sandwich to me.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

Ding ding ding ding! What's that noise? Why, it's the sack of bells I'm throwing at you!

Nerdy falls unconscious, and I take off with the sandwich before the reactor blows up.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Unfortunately, the blast of an unstable ambiguity reactor is faster than you. Fourteen million years later, when the land is habitable again, I bend over and pick up the perfectly unscathed Sandwich from a pile of dust. I hop into my Mad Max style road warrior car and drive away.

[Immortal Platypus]

14 hours ago, NerdyAarakocra said:

However, as this breaks the rules, the sandwich reverts to its previous state, in my hand.

I would argue it doesn't, as The Sandwich wasn't duplicated, only a Sandwich and sandwiches. Thus, the sandwich returns to my hand.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I contest this veiwpoint, leading into a huge debate tournament. As you're giving your impassioned closing speech, I grab the sandwich.

[Immortal Platypus]

Luckily, I won the debate and the judge gives me The Sandwich as a reward.

[Edema Rue she/her]

The caterpillar sits up curiously, then lies back down to continue its nap.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

The Shadows discover the power of puns and use them to inflict psychic damage on everyone.

[Immortal Platypus]

Because of my immunity, I keep the sandwich.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I sneak up behind you while you're gloating and take the sandwich. I run into a platypus-proof vault.

[Wittles he/him]

*Puts down platypult* (platypus catapult) I use my nonexistent lock picking skills to smash the safe with a wrecking ball and steal the sandwich

[Lord Gregorio he/him]

I drink my invisibility potion and steal the sandwich, making sure to make the sandwich invisible as well.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Unfortunately, Sandwich battle law prohibits tampering with the Sandwich, and you are arrested. I, being one of the officers who arrested you, take the Sandwich and run off.