Sharder Incorrect Quotes

[Szeth's Facepalm]

Hiya guys!! @Witless of Shinovar's latest SU inspired me to generate some quotes for sharders, and... they're pretty funny.

CalanoCorvus: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold?
Szeth's Facepalm: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house.
Elf: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million.
Szeth's Facepalm: Good thinking.

CalanoCorvus: Everyone, synchronize your watches.
Szeth's Facepalm: I don’t know how to do that.
Morningtide: I don’t wear a watch.
Elf: Time is a construct.

*Szeth's Facepalm is cooking*
Mornintide: Any chance that’s for me?
Szeth's Facepalm: It’s for CalanoCorvus. I’m planning on making some bad choices tonight, and I need them on my side.
Elf: I never realized the forethought that went into being a disappointment.

^^^^^^^^^ me whenever i accidentally offer him things with gluten ;-;-;-;

Cinnamon: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?
Szeth's Facepalm: Have everyone stand.
Morningtide: Bring three more chairs!
CalanoCorvus: The most important ones can sit down.
Elf: Kill three.

^^^^^^ Elf i love this one sm

Cinnamon: Szeth's Facepalm and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us
Witless: *Sighing* What did Szeth's Facepalm do?
Cinnamon: They chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...
Szeth's Facepalm: Who wants a steering wheel?

^^^^ that one is just so... so... i don't understand it but i laughed for like 2 minutes

Cinnamon: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.
Szeth's Facepalm: The cow???
Cinnamon: What?
Morningtide: Facepalm, W H Y?

Cinnamon, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him
Szeth's Facepalm: You did WHAT–
Witless: William Snakepeare

ANYWAYYYYYY

These are pretty fun and everyone should make them. Please keep them not weird and clean :D  Here are a couple of generators:

https://incorrect-quotes-generator.neocities.org/

https://perchance.org/incorrect-quote-generator

tagging everyone i used in the quotes: @CalanoCorvus @Elf @Morningtide @Cinnamon (aannnnd i already tagged Witless.)

Edited February 16, 2023 by Szeth's Facepalm

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

17 minutes ago, Szeth's Facepalm said:

https://perchance.org/incorrect-quote-generator

Okay these are actually hilarious to just mess around with.

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

Spoiler

Bookwyrm: : Wizard:'s refusing to wear their glasses!
Wizard:: Bookwyrm: , look, I wore the glasses for a day. My eyes are much better now. Watch.
Wizard:: *points to Insanity:* Insanity:.
Wizard:: *points to Cellist:* Cellist:.
Wizard:: *points to Ranryu:* Sasquatch.

Wizard:, about Bookwyrm: and Insanity:: Storms, would you two just get a room already?
Insanity:: Excuse me, Wizard:?
Wizard:: You both just keep agreeing about horrifying things and relishing everybody else's misery. So seriously, when's the wedding?
Bookwyrm: : ...
Ranryu:: I ship it!
Cellist:: CAN YOU NOT?

Insanity:: Where’s Ranryu:?
Cellist:: Doing stuff.
Insanity:: I don’t like the sound of that. Where’s Bookwyrm: ?
Cellist:: Trying to stop Ranryu: from doing the stuff.
Insanity:: And Wizard:?
Cellist:: Trying to stop Bookwyrm: from stopping Ranryu: from doing the stuff.
Insanity:: I see. And what are you doing here, Cellist:?
Cellist:: I’m supposed to stop you from stopping Wizard: from stopping Bookwyrm: from stopping Ranryu: from doing the stuff.

Cellist:: So don't panic but one of us is possessed by an owl....
Ranryu:: ....
Wizard:: .....
Insanity:: ......
Bookwyrm: : ..Who?
Cellist:: That's the thing we don't-
*Everyone stares at Bookwyrm: *

Ranryu:: I’ve done a lot of dumb stuff.
Cellist:: I witnessed the dumb stuff.
Insanity:: I recorded the dumb stuff.
Wizard:: I joined you in the dumb stuff.
Bookwyrm: : I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!

This is fun !

@InfiniteInsanity @The Bookwyrm @Ranryu @That1Cellist

Edited February 16, 2023 by The Wandering Wizard

[That1Cellist he/him]

Spoiler

Insanity: Wow, left handed AND British? You really are an illusion

Ranryu: I’m sick and tired of being called 'mortal' like, you don’t know that. Neither do I. I have never died even ONCE. Nothing has been proven yet. Stop making assumptions. It’s rude. 

*The gang when they drop food on the floor* 
Cellist: Aw man. *Throws it away* 
Bookwyrm: Five second rule! 
Ranryu: Foolish germs, thinking they can stop me!? *Eats it off the floor* 
Insanity: *Sobs on the floor* 

Ranryu: I'm bored. 
Wizard: Wanna commit first degree murder? 
Ranryu: Sure! 
Cellist, hearing them: No- Stop, don't do that! Put that knife down! Put Bookwyrm down!! 

 

Bookwyrm: *is hugging Ranryu* 
Insanity: Hey! It's my turn to hug Ranryu! 
Insanity: *grabs Ranryu* 
Cellist: *kicking down the door* What do you mean, "yOuR tUrN"? We agreed now is my time slot! 
Bookwyrm: No, It's still my turn! 
Ranryu: *suffocating* Guys, I love you, but just because I'm the smallest doesn't mean you can be hugging me constantly! 
Insanity: But we need the moral support! 
Bookwyrm: And you're small! Which is cute! 
Cellist: If I don't hug you right now I think the depression will kick in and my body will stop functioning. 
Ranryu: *close to tears* Well- I, I guess. 
 

 These are just hilarious. @The Wandering Wizard @The Bookwyrm @InfiniteInsanity @Ranryu

Edited February 16, 2023 by That1Cellist

[The Bookwyrm he/him]

Spoiler

Luna, watching Bookwyrm and Calano fight: Are you sure they should be fighting? What if they get hurt?
Insanity, not bothered by the chaos: It’s fine. They’re too evenly matched to hurt each other.
Luna: Then... who’s the strongest out of you three?
Bookwyrm: Insanity.
Calano: Insanity.
Insanity: Me.

Insanity: They can't make me admit France exists, right? Legally, that's not allowed.
Insanity: Sure, if France was REAL I'd say I liked it.
Insanity: But who's to say.
Bookwyrm: I think France isn't real.
Calano: Bookwyrm, you've been to France.
Bookwyrm: And???

Wizard: Here comes the lightning!
Wizard, whispering: You've got to imagine it coming out my fingertips, wherein I am an almighty wizard.
Silhouette: Ok, currently imagining that. Hmm, not bad. Not bad at all.

@InfiniteInsanity @CalanoCorvus @DoomslugLuna (Yes, I put you in here, don't ask me why) @The Wandering Wizard @Shining Silhouette

[Frustration]

Random Sharder: I don't understand this thing about the Cosmere.

Frustration: *checks watch* How much time do you have?

[Shining Silhouette he/him]

...Me thinking this was an actual occurrence and searching the shard for when I said that

I am DYING this is hysterical

Spoiler

Silhouette: We need a distraction.
Cinnamon: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?
Shallan, whispering: My time has come

*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’*
Silhouette: Thanks fam!
Wiz: oh no
Telrao: *cries* I love you too
Archie: Sounds fake but okay
Kajsa: *A flustered mess*
Bookwyrm: can i get a refund

 

Cinnamon: How petty can you get?
Telrao: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

 

Silhouette: Listen, I can explain...
Cinnamon: You’re making $500,000 and you’re only gonna pay me $30,000?
Shallan: You’re getting 30 grand? I’m getting $1,000!
Wizard: You guys are getting paid?

 

Bookwyrm: Dear friends, your Christmas gift this year… is me. That’s right, another year of friendship. Your membership has been renewed.

 

Silhouette: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.
Wizard: You're like 17 years old
Silhouette: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!
 

Kajsa: With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later.

 

Witless: I was arrested for being too cool.
Archie: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.

 

*The squad is having dinner together*
Elf: Calano, can you pass the salt?
Calano: *Throws Silhouette across the table*

 

Elf, negotiating with Calano: We have Morningtide. Give us ten thousand dollars and shewill be returned to you unharmed
Morningtide: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand dollars?
Elf:
Morningtide: MAKE IT ONE MILLION–
Elf: MORNINGTIDE STOP

@Cinnamon, @The Wandering Wizard, @Shallan Stormblessed, @Telrao, @CalanoCorvus, @Morningtide, @Elf, @The Bookwyrm, @The Aspiring Archivist, @Kajsa :), @Witless of Shinovar

Edited February 16, 2023 by Shining Silhouette

[Morningtide she/her]

Oh I love this! Incorrect quotes are amazing. @Elf @Shining Silhouette @Szeth's Facepalm

Spoiler

Silhouette: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no idea what to put in them. Any suggestions?
Facepalm: Put spaghetti in it.
Silhouette: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you.
Elf: Put spaghetti in it.
Silhouette: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you two.
Morningtide: Put spaghetti in it.
Silhouette: I am no longer taking suggestions.

Facepalm: You have friends and I envy that.
Silhouette: You're welcome to share my friends.
Facepalm: *looks at Morningtide and Elf*
Facepalm: I don't want those.

Morningtide: Why did you kidnap Facepalm!?!?!
Silhouette: Ah- um- well- the reason for that is, uhh...
Elf: Sometimes, we must work together towards a common goal.
Morningtide: NOT TO KIDNAP PEOPLE!

Morningtide: You’re just being paranoid. Again.
Elf: When have I been paranoid?
Morningtide: Um, when you first met Silhouette you thought they were an undercover cop…?
Elf: No one has a wart that big, I thought it was a surveillance camera!
Morningtide: And last year you were sure Facepalm was a mermaid!
Elf: They hate wearing shirts! COINCIDENCE?!
*Later, when Elf’s theory is proven wrong*
Morningtide: Do you have anything to say for yourself?
Elf: I still think Facepalm is a mermaid.

Police: You’re under arrest for trying to carry three people on a single motorcycle.
Elf, with Facepalm and Silhouette behind them: Wait, what do you mean THREE?!
Police: Yes…three.
Elf: Oh, my God— What the crap!?
Police: Wha-
Elf: Morningtide FELL OFF!

Elf: There is no future. there is no past. do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet.
Facepalm:
Morningtide:
Silhouette:
Everyone Else At Elf’s Surprise Birthday Party:
Facepalm: All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

Elf: Is stabbing someone immoral?
Facepalm: Not if they consent to it.
Morningtide: Depends who you’re stabbing.
Silhouette: YES?!?

 

[Frustration]

@Channelknight Fadran: You're joining my Role-play.

Random Sharder: Well, you see I have a thing I need to--

Channel knight Fadran: That wasn't an offer.

[S. Stormy she/her]

19 minutes ago, Shining Silhouette said:

Silhouette: We need a distraction.
Cinnamon: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?
Shallan, whispering: My time has come

As if I need a reason to jump up and down and make weird noises.

Edited February 16, 2023 by Shallan Stormblessed

[Szeth's Facepalm]

20 minutes ago, Morningtide said:

Oh I love this! Incorrect quotes are amazing. @Elf @Shining Silhouette @Szeth's Facepalm

  Hide contents

Silhouette: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no idea what to put in them. Any suggestions?
Facepalm: Put spaghetti in it.
Silhouette: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you.
Elf: Put spaghetti in it.
Silhouette: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you two.
Morningtide: Put spaghetti in it.
Silhouette: I am no longer taking suggestions.

Facepalm: You have friends and I envy that.
Silhouette: You're welcome to share my friends.
Facepalm: *looks at Morningtide and Elf*
Facepalm: I don't want those.

Morningtide: Why did you kidnap Facepalm!?!?!
Silhouette: Ah- um- well- the reason for that is, uhh...
Elf: Sometimes, we must work together towards a common goal.
Morningtide: NOT TO KIDNAP PEOPLE!

Morningtide: You’re just being paranoid. Again.
Elf: When have I been paranoid?
Morningtide: Um, when you first met Silhouette you thought they were an undercover cop…?
Elf: No one has a wart that big, I thought it was a surveillance camera!
Morningtide: And last year you were sure Facepalm was a mermaid!
Elf: They hate wearing shirts! COINCIDENCE?!
*Later, when Elf’s theory is proven wrong*
Morningtide: Do you have anything to say for yourself?
Elf: I still think Facepalm is a mermaid.

Police: You’re under arrest for trying to carry three people on a single motorcycle.
Elf, with Facepalm and Silhouette behind them: Wait, what do you mean THREE?!
Police: Yes…three.
Elf: Oh, my God— What the crap!?
Police: Wha-
Elf: Morningtide FELL OFF!

Elf: There is no future. there is no past. do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet.
Facepalm:
Morningtide:
Silhouette:
Everyone Else At Elf’s Surprise Birthday Party:
Facepalm: All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

Elf: Is stabbing someone immoral?
Facepalm: Not if they consent to it.
Morningtide: Depends who you’re stabbing.
Silhouette: YES?!?

 

I love all the ones with Chaotic Elf™ so much omg :3

Also, I am a mermaid.

[InfiniteInsanity she/her]

 

Spoiler

Ranryu: I dare you- 

Cellist: Snail is not allowed to accept dares anymore. 

Ranryu: Why not? 

Snail: "I have no regard for my own or others personal safety", as some would say. 

 

Bookwyrm: Hey, I say we go down there, kick Snail’s door in, and let them know that we’re in town. 

Cellist: That ain’t the way we do things here. We may have to go in there and run a con, drop a bug, do the smooth talking. 

Bookwyrm: Okay, you come with me, you do the smooth talking, let’s go. 

Cellist: No, we just can’t go in there and kick down Snail’s door. We need a plan. 

Bookwyrm: Well who makes the plans? 

Cellist: Ranryu. 

Bookwyrm: Ranryu, what's the plan? 

Ranryu:You guys are gonna go down there, kick Snail’s door in, let them know you’re in town. 

 

Cellist: *sneaking in through their window* 

Wizard: *turning in their chair and flicking the light one* You want to tell me where you've been all night? 

Cellist: I was with Insa? 

Insa: *turning in their chair* Wanna try again? 

 

Bookwyrm: I hate taking off my glasses, because without them, my vision goes from Full HD all the way down to buffering at 240p and I just can't handle that. 

 

Cellist: Hey guys! I drew everyones soul! 

Ranryu: Why is Wizard's a monster? 

Wizard:  Cellist, you forgot Ranryu's! Its only an empty space! 

Cellist, proudly: Exactly 

 

Wizard, to Insa: If you see Cellist, give them this message *makes a neutral face* 

Wizard: They'll know what it means. 

*later* 

Insa: oh, and Wizard said to give you a message. 

Insa: *makes a neutral face* 

Cellist: Oh no. The neutral face of displeasure. 

 

Ranryu, Snail & Cellist: *screaming* 

Insa: *runs into the room* What's wrong, Cellist?! 

Ranryu: Wait, why are you asking Cellist that when Snail and I are also here? 

Insa: Because Cellist wouldn't scream unless it's an emergency. You two scream whenever you have the chance. 

 

Snail: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and killed it. 

Snail: And I started thinking. 

Snail: Like, it was just trying to get food. 

Snail: What if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck? 

Bookwyrm: Are you ok?

 @The Bookwyrm @The Wandering Wizard @TheGreatSnail @Ranryu @That1Cellist

[Morningtide she/her]

Lol yes XD

1 hour ago, Szeth's Facepalm said:

I love all the ones with Chaotic Elf™ so much omg :3

Also, I am a mermaid.

 

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

I was messing around with the second generator and this popped up

Spoiler

Congratulations! You've stumbled upon a secret message from me (the programmer of this generator): Remember to drink water. And also take your meds if you have those and are supposed to take them. Also, have a nice day if that's a possibility. I hope y'all are doing great, and remember: even if it's not pride month anymore, always respect eachother's pronouns!

For some reason it made me really happy .

[Morningtide she/her]

More  

Spoiler

Calano: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.
Elf: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.
Calano: Not when you’re playing with Facepalm, it’s not. They put words like “ephemeral” and I put “dog.”

^I feel like @Szeth's Facepalm you would be one to put down crazy complicated scrabble words

Symph: Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, and wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
Bookwyrm: That's deep.
Facepalm: That means that ketchup is a smoothie.
Bookwyrm: That's deeper.
Silhouette: ...You guys are idiots.

Bookwyrm: But what about Symph?
Morningtide: Don't worry about them.
Morningtide: I once watched them fall down 5 flights of stairs, stand up, and keep eating their hotdog like nothing happened.

Facepalm: How did you even get in here?
Elf: Calano's window! Or, as I like to call it, "Elf's door"!
Calano: I’m closing the window.

Facepalm: Welcome to Applebee's, do you want apples or bees?
Morningtide: Bees?
Facepalm: THEY HAVE SELECTED THE BEES!
Morningtide: WAIT-
*Calano approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly*

Morningtide: Hey, Calano you're smart, tell me what would happen if I chugged 3 gallons of chloroform.
Calano: Have you ever been to a mortuary?
Morningtide: Yea, my grandma lives there.
Elf: That is the worst response to that question.

Wandering Wizard: I really like Eminem.
Morningtide: I prefer skittles.
Bookwyrm: They are talking about the rapper.
Morningtide: Why would they eat the wrapper?

Elf: What would Calano think?
Wandering Wizard: Ok, that’s an interesting thought, but hear me out: what if… we ran an experiment where we spent the rest of our lives finding out what happened if we never told them?

Facepalm: What time is it?
Symph: I don’t know, pass me that saxophone and we’ll find out
Symph: *BLASTS the saxophone*
Wandering Wizard: WHO THE IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE FRICKING MORNING
Symph: It’s 2 am

It's not letting me tag anyone  

[Channelknight Fadran]

I propose we start writing out our own Incorrect Quote templates for the various Sharders to plug themselves into

[Frustration]

5 minutes ago, Channelknight Fadran said:

I propose we start writing out our own Incorrect Quote templates for the various Sharders to plug themselves into

I mean, I think making our own is a good idea, but I also think they work best when designed for specific people.

Like so:

 

Frustration: Fadran this is an intervention.

Fadran: What do you mean?

Frustration: You've made forty-three posts, in six different role-plays, in the past five minutes.

Fadran: You're right.

Fadran: I've been slacking.

 

@Robin Sedai: Frustration, you're old.

Frustration: I am not old. I'm just experienced.

Robin: Yeah, you have a lot of experience.

Rabin: Gained over your long life.

[Channelknight Fadran]

Here's some I made with some OGs:

Spoiler

Frustration: Danex... How do I begin to explain Danex?
Fadran: Danex is flawless.
Matrim: I hear their hair's insured for $10,000.
Enter: I hear they do car commercials... in Japan.
xino: One time they punched me in the face... it was awesome.

'Can I copy the homework?'
Frustration: I can help you with it!
Danex: Yeah, sure.
Fadran: Bold of you to assume I did the homework.
Matrim: lol nope.
Enter: Wait, we had homework?!?!?!
xino: *Read 5:55pm*

xino, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.
Fadran: Hey.
Matrim: Hi.
Danex: Hello.
Frustration: Hey!
xino: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Enter: We were out of Doritos.

xino: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat*
Fadran: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents
xino: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you
Matrim: Actually I did the math, Fadran would have $225, not $0.15.
Fadran: Fam I’m right here....
Danex: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda
xino: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?
Danex: Sorry I only have a dollar
xino:
Matrim: Hey I just realized my friend is right, Fadran would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent
Danex: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice
Matrim: You can buy anything you want with $22,500
Frustration: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice
Matrim: Apply juice to what
Enter: Directly to the forehead
Fadran: Great chat everyone

@xinoehp512 @dannnnnex @Matrim's Dice @Frustration @Enter a username

 

Gwehehe Archipelago squad:

Spoiler

Fadran: Haly, I'm sad.
Haly: *Holds out arms for a hug* It’s going to be okay.
Misting: Archivist, I'm sad.
Archivist, nodding: mood.

Fadran, banging on the door: Haly! Open up!
Haly: Well, it all started when I was a kid...
Misting: No, they meant-
Archivist: Let them finish.

@The Halcyon Girl @The Aspiring Archivist @Mr. Misting

 

Gwehehe Reaper squad:

Spoiler

[The group is a prison cell that was just hit by an earthquake]
Bookwyrm: Uh, I'm gonna roll a perception check of... 4, and see if our cell is, uh, in any way damaged by this quake
Fadran: You're in a prison cell
Aarakocra: You did great. Well, I got a 10-
Fadran: You're in a prison cell with bars on it :3
Wizard: I got a 1!
Fadran: You're in... a cube-shaped place.

Bookwyrm: Is stabbing someone immoral?
Fadran: Not if they consent to it.
Aarakocra: Depends who you’re stabbing.
Wizard: YES?!?

@The Bookwyrm @NerdyAarakocra @The Wandering Wizard

Edited February 16, 2023 by Channelknight Fadran

[Mat he/him]

Why do those seem so accurate to what I might actually say o_0

[The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns]

Me: I'm going to make my character have a panic attack!

Other RPers: Do you think the anxiety you're giving this character is a reflection of your own?

Me: ...

Other RPers: ...

Me: ...and trauma!

Actually now that I think about it this is probably a lot of us.

Edited February 16, 2023 by The Aspiring Archivist

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

This is hilarious, can someone put me in one?

[kajsa ㅇㅅㅇ she/her]

3 hours ago, Shining Silhouette said:

Kajsa: With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I'm dying xD Literally so true. This is my life motto now.

[kajsa ㅇㅅㅇ she/her]

Here are mine.

Spoiler

Wizard: Sihouette, I’m afraid.
Sihouette: Just stay close to Haly.
Wizard: That's why I’m afraid.

Witless: I need a long word.
Wizard: T-rex but the long one.

Witless: You’re a loose cannon, Wizard.
Wizard: No, I’m not. I’m a cannon, maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?
Sihouette: I think you play by your own rules.
Archivist: No way, they think rules were made to be broken.
Witless: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.
Wizard: No, I’m just a reckless renegade. Haly is a loose cannon.
Haly: *smashes a chair* Aah! You shut your trap, Wizard!
Archivist: I’d say Haly’s more of a cop on the edge with nothing to lose. That’s an entirely different thing.
Sihouette: Now I’m just confused. Is Wizard a loose cannon or not?
Witless: All right, put on a pot of coffee. We’re gonna get to the bottom of this.
Wizard: *groans*
Haly: Aw, man.

Archivist (TAAron): I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.
Haly (Haly): But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.
Archivist (TAAron): O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??
Haly (Haly): Is it working?

Sihouette: Any tips on how to make someone like me?
Kajsa: Try to make them laugh all the time.
Sihouette: Oh, wow! You actually help me for once, and it's even good advice!
Kajsa: Yeah, the more they laugh, the more time they spend with their eyes closed, so it'd be easier. 

Ouch xD

Archivist: Are we really going to let Kajsa keep Haly?
Sihouette: We kept Witless.

Kajsa: Let's just agree to both say we're sorry on the count of three.
Kajsa: One... two... three.
Archivist: ...
Kajsa: ...
Kajsa: See, now I'm just disappointed in both of us.

Sihouette: Croissants: dropped
Kajsa: Road: works ahead
Archivist: Shavacado: fre
Witless:
Witless: ...I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

*The Squad is playing Minecraft together*
Wizard: Ooh, a village! You know what that means!
Sihouette: Hostile takeover?
Archivist: Genocide?
Kajsa: Steal everything!
Wizard: No, I meant-
Witless: I didn’t know we would fight the ender dragon this early! A village worth of beds isn’t enough!
Haly: WHAT ARE WE EVEN DOING?!?!
Wizard: …I was going to say move into the village and become the mayors…
Witless: Ohhhh! That sounds like a better idea.
Haly: Agreed.

Haly: *cooking*
Archivist: *kicks down door*
Archivist: *grabs knife from Haly's hand*
Archivist: WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR?
Haly:
Haly: What.
Wizard: He's trying to tell you he wants to cook.

Kajsa: Don't worry, I've got a few knives up my sleeve.
Wizard: I think you mean cards.
Archivist: She did not.
Kajsa, pulling out knives: I did not.

HAHAHAHA

I should probably stop now.

[Szeth's Facepalm]

*le gesp*

@Kajsa :)

no double posties pls

<3 <3 <3

[kajsa ㅇㅅㅇ she/her]

1 minute ago, Szeth's Facepalm said:

*le gesp*

@Kajsa :)

no double posties pls

<3 <3 <3

I did no double posties

Did I?

...sorry