The Battle for the Sandwich

[Vielence She/Her]

I oobleckbthe sandworm and take the sandwich

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I take it back and cast an anti-taking spell.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

On 9/19/2025 at 5:12 PM, Uninteligenius said:

I stand up and began to speak very dramatically and truthfully to the court, "First off, the defendant, @VieB13, is guilty of breaking and entering. She broke into my Chull Mobile 3000 and hotwired it. Then she drove off and, in doing so, stole the vehicle. But this isn't all, she also left me in a cloud of dust, and as a result, I needed lung surgery and have taken an emotional toll that I will never recover from. We ask the honorable judge Bartholomew to find the defendant guilty of breaking and entering, burglary, and emotional damage, and charge her with ten years in a federal prison and fine her $1,000,000 for damages and medical bills."

Bartholomew thanks you and asks the defense (@VieB13) for their opening statements. 

On 9/19/2025 at 5:15 PM, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

This jurymember calls upon @VieB13 for the defense.

I also ask 2 questions: Where is this proof that this has happened? and Does this really merit $1,000,000 in recompense?

As the defendant has not requested trial by jury, Bartholomew questions your presence as a jury member. He also asks you to maintain the proceedings of the trial properly, reminding that defense comes after opening statements and the case-in-chief by the prosecution, and that the right to question the prosecution is generally reserved for the defense. 

On 9/19/2025 at 9:54 PM, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Trout runs away in fear. 

I summon a sandworm to try and eat you

I blast it backwards, looking tired. 

 

@YouCantHaveMySandwich I snatch the sandwich instead. 

Edited September 22, 2025 by Ashkaloda

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

On 9/19/2025 at 4:12 PM, Uninteligenius said:

I stand up and began to speak very dramatically and truthfully to the court, "First off, the defendant, @VieB13, is guilty of breaking and entering. She broke into my Chull Mobile 3000 and hotwired it. Then she drove off and, in doing so, stole the vehicle. But this isn't all, she also left me in a cloud of dust, and as a result, I needed lung surgery and have taken an emotional toll that I will never recover from. We ask the honorable judge Bartholomew to find the defendant guilty of breaking and entering, burglary, and emotional damage, and charge her with ten years in a federal prison and fine her $1,000,000 for damages and medical bills."

Objection: speculation

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

3 minutes ago, Kansas Stormcursed said:

Objection: speculation

Bartholomew reminds you that a speculation objection may only be presented by the opposing attorney. 

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

4 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

Bartholomew reminds you that a speculation objection may only be presented by the opposing attorney. 

Shshshshshhh

[NerdSandwich she/her]

41 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

Bartholomew thanks you and asks the defense (@VieB13) for their opening statements. 

As the defendant has not requested trial by jury, Bartholomew questions your presence as a jury member. He also asks you to maintain the proceedings of the trial properly, reminding that defense comes after opening statements and the case-in-chief by the prosecution, and that the right to question the prosecution is generally reserved for the defense. 

I blast it backwards, looking tired. 

 

@YouCantHaveMySandwich I snatch the sandwich instead. 

Only to have me take it back and cast anti-snatching, anti-taking, anti-grabbing, and anti-stealing spells instead.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

39 minutes ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

Only to have me take it back and cast anti-snatching, anti-taking, anti-grabbing, and anti-stealing spells instead.

I look rather dejected, having been forced into swiping the sandwich and make off with it. 

[The Great Wyver She/Her]

I follow behind with my totally canon Steelrunning powers in order to catch up with @Ashkaloda and take the sandwich. I then use a totallyu existent breath to make it not be stolen. It's a big, strong sandwich you wouldn't wanna fight.

Edited September 22, 2025 by The Great Wyver
cannon

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I fight it anyway and successfully steal the Sandwich back.

Edited September 22, 2025 by YouCantHaveMySandwich

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

Wait nooo the poll isn't a perfect 1/3 2/3 split anymore

Someone vote microwave

[The Great Wyver She/Her]

2 hours ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

I fight it anyway and successfully steal the Sandwich back.

But since it's invested with my Breath it runs back to me.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

38 minutes ago, The Great Wyver said:

But since it's invested with my Breath it runs back to me.

While waiting for @VieB13's opening statement I send out a robot dog that takes the Sandwich and brings it to me.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I hack the robot and it brings the Sandwich to me.

[Vielence She/Her]

I hack your hack then take it. 

[The Great Wyver She/Her]

I hack your hack your hack and take the sandwhich. I give it more breaths so its more alive.

[Vielence She/Her]

I remind you (still having the sandwich) that only the bolded can steal the sandwich while grinning

[Soulbinder she/her]

Well, my response, both bold and bolded, is to roll up on a hoverboard while T-posing and snatch the sandwich from you while you're distracted.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I once again ignore all plot and steal the sandwich via deafening you with a recording of @ChipsAHoid's singing.

You don't hear me sneak up on you and steal the Sandwich.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

12 minutes ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

I once again ignore all plot and steal the sandwich via deafening you with a recording of @ChipsAHoid's singing.

You don't hear me sneak up on you and steal the Sandwich.

Plot once again seeks punishment on you and forces you to work in the Pits of Hathsin for 346 years, during which possession of the sandwich is given back to @Soulbinder. 

[Keke They/he]

I drop down and scream so loud it shatters windows and causes a tornado 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

I give up on the court case against @VieB13 and ask Bartholomew to dismiss it because it's taking too long. I then leave the courthouse and hire SWAT to steal the Sandwich for me.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

45 minutes ago, Hawks said:

I drop down and scream so loud it shatters windows and causes a tornado 

1 minute ago, Uninteligenius said:

I give up on the court case against @VieB13 and ask Bartholomew to dismiss it because it's taking too long. I then leave the courthouse and hire SWAT to steal the Sandwich for me.

Clone appears out of nowhere as a Freedom Worldweaver. With a wave of his hand, the tornado veers away from him and attacks the SWAT after they've taken the sandwich, so I can take it from them and can turn them into Lifeless that serve me.

 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

1 minute ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Clone appears out of nowhere as a Freedom Worldweaver. With a wave of his hand, the tornado veers away from him and attacks the SWAT after they've taken the sandwich, so I can take it from them and can turn them into Lifeless that serve me.

 

The SWAT are all wearing anti-tornado hats and anti-be-turned-into-Lifeless sweaters, so they're completely fine as they trek back to me and hand me the Sandwich, then set up a perimeter outside my warehouse.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

2 minutes ago, Uninteligenius said:

The SWAT are all wearing anti-tornado hats and anti-be-turned-into-Lifeless sweaters, so they're completely fine as they trek back to me and hand me the Sandwich, then set up a perimeter outside my warehouse.

Clone uses air Worldweaving to deposit anti-hat hats on top of their hats, and anti-sweater sweaters on top of their sweaters, then summons a new tornado, turns 'em into Lifeless, and brings 'em to me.