The Battle for the Sandwich

[Unintelligenius he/him]

9 hours ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

however, I swoop in and steal the Sandwich, then fly away.

I shoot you with a missile and then grab the Sandwich from your corpse. Then I dig a tunnel to the middle of the Earth and hide.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I pull a Jasnah and follow you to the middle of the Earth. I steal the Sandwich and fly away using Skybreaking.

[Vielence She/Her]

I am a Windrunner. I must protect this sandwich. Thus, I steal it, vanquish you, and continue flying away. 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

I am a skybreaker. I arrest you for vanquishing because that's obviously illegal. I take the Sandwich for myself for research purposes. 

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I am an Edgedancer. I use the Surge of Friction to slip the Sandwich from your hands and into mine. I mime taking a bite and then successfully run away.

[Vielence She/Her]

15 hours ago, Uninteligenius said:

I am a skybreaker. I arrest you for vanquishing because that's obviously illegal. I take the Sandwich for myself for research purposes. 

I explain that it cannot be illegal as my oaths did nit stop me, and I was only protecting the sandwich from those who would to it harm. 
 

I then lash it back up to me, and fly away

[Unintelligenius he/him]

10 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

I explain that it cannot be illegal as my oaths did nit stop me, and I was only protecting the sandwich from those who would to it harm. 
 

I then lash it back up to me, and fly away

I explain that your morals are not the same as the law and that, according to Supreme Legislation Area Code 4.11.8, "vanquishing will result in immediate arrest by the perpetrator." I arrest you again, this time putting you in a cell that is impossible to escape, and then take the Sandwich.

[Vielence She/Her]

I *explode* the cell, heal my self with stormlight, and then steal the sandwich, put you ins different cell, and go into hiding

[Unintelligenius he/him]

3 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

I *explode* the cell, heal my self with stormlight, and then steal the sandwich, put you ins different cell, and go into hiding

I walk out of my cell because you forgot to lock it and then go searching for you.

[Vielence She/Her]

I *poof* invisible so you can’t see me or the sandwich 

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

20 hours ago, VieB13 said:

I *poof* invisible so you can’t see me or the sandwich 

Bartholomew echolocates you and then nabs the sandwich. 

[Vielence She/Her]

2 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

Bartholomew echolocates you and then nabs the sandwich. 

No. He doesn't bc Bartholomew was exploded, and ooblecked multiple times. 

Also, monkeys don't have echolocation. 

*keeps the sandwich*

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

2 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

No. He doesn't bc Bartholomew was exploded, and ooblecked multiple times. 

Also, monkeys don't have echolocation. 

*keeps the sandwich*

Yes they do

I use one to find and steal the sandwich 

Isn’t Jerome the money and Bartholomew the fish with legs?

[Vielence She/Her]

1 minute ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Yes they do

I use one to find and steal the sandwich 

Isn’t Jerome the money and Bartholomew the fish with legs?

NO THEY DON'T

 

"No, most monkeys do not have echolocation." I googled it Chips.

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

23 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

NO THEY DON'T

 

"No, most monkeys do not have echolocation." I googled it Chips.

Most? Had to google it but I remember reading about the Aye-Ayes doing that as a kid now. See uh. In 1st grade I read animal encyclopedias for fun. I was weird. Well, still am…

Oh that reminds me don’t ask why this happened but in band we learned that according to the ai overview when crickets get too cold it can lead to “death and cannibalism” and when they get too hot, it can lead to death. It then helpfully said “death is usually fatal in crickets”. I’m sorry but when is death not fatal in crickets??

Edited September 14, 2025 by ChipsAHoid

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

52 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

No. He doesn't bc Bartholomew was exploded, and ooblecked multiple times. 

Also, monkeys don't have echolocation. 

*keeps the sandwich*

Chips is correct (for once). Jerome is the monkey controlled by @Uninteligenius while Bartholomew is the fish with legs that I control. And Bartholomew most certainly does have echolocation. 

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

3 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

Chips is correct (for once). Jerome is the monkey controlled by @Uninteligenius while Bartholomew is the fish with legs that I control. And Bartholomew most certainly does have echolocation. 

Wow. Me being right? That’s a first  

[Vielence She/Her]

4 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Most? Had to google it but I remember reading about the Aye-Ayes doing that as a kid now. See uh. In 1st grade I read animal encyclopedias for fun. I was weird. Well, still am…

Oh that reminds me don’t ask why this happened but in band we learned that according to the ai overview when crickets get too cold it can lead to “death and cannibalism” and when they get too hot, it can lead to death. It then helpfully said “death is usually fatal in crickets”. I’m sorry but when is death not fatal in crickets??

When death isn’t fatal obviously. 

3 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

Chips is correct (for once). Jerome is the monkey controlled by @Uninteligenius while Bartholomew is the fish with legs that I control. And Bartholomew most certainly does have echolocation. 

Aw, crap. 

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

4 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Most? Had to google it but I remember reading about the Aye-Ayes doing that as a kid now. See uh. In 1st grade I read animal encyclopedias for fun. I was weird. Well, still am…

Oh that reminds me don’t ask why this happened but in band we learned that according to the ai overview when crickets get too cold it can lead to “death and cannibalism” and when they get too hot, it can lead to death. It then helpfully said “death is usually fatal in crickets”. I’m sorry but when is death not fatal in crickets??

Also pretty sure aye-ayes are lemurs, not monkeys. 

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

5 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

Also pretty sure aye-ayes are lemurs, not monkeys. 

Ehhhhh same diff really

[Unintelligenius he/him]

On 9/14/2025 at 12:57 PM, Ashkaloda said:

Chips is correct (for once). Jerome is the monkey controlled by @Uninteligenius while Bartholomew is the fish with legs that I control. And Bartholomew most certainly does have echolocation. 

Jerome definitely has echolocation too. 

Jerome uses his echolocation to locate the Sandwich and then steals it and gives it to me.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Jerome turns on you and gives the Sandwich to me.

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

4 hours ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

Jerome turns on you and gives the Sandwich to me.

Woah woah woah no godmodding

that’s his monkey right?

[Unintelligenius he/him]

6 hours ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

Jerome turns on you and gives the Sandwich to me.

Jerome turning on me was obviously part of an elaborate plan because he would never actually turn on me. Right after he gives you the Sandwich, Jerome punches you and then steals it back and also all your spare cash. He then returns the Sandwich and the cash to me.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

Right I've been gone for a bit

@Ashkaloda anything I should know

On 9/12/2025 at 3:30 PM, El Denisimo said:

Yup, that should be enough.
Here, have an extra, say, 50, as a first-purchase bonus!
*Airdrops over 50 corpses on you, each one earily looking identical to Kansas*

I staple @Kansas Stormcursed's Cognitive Shadow to this body and give him some Dor so he can maintain sufficient Connection.

Edited September 16, 2025 by KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren