The Battle for the Sandwich

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

"Indeed, there is definitely a difference. More people should acknowledge it, as calling an immortal platypus just a 'platypus' is quite insensitive." I say from inside the glove box. I jump out and grab the sandwich from your hands (or wherever it is in your car), then dive out the window and unfold my wingsuit.

Edited November 21, 2022 by Sequence

[Immortal Platypus]

You jumped out of my glove box? But that car is hundreds of miles away in my garage. I'm in Perry's flying car. And the sandwich isn't in my car. It is in Perry's car. And, as per my preferred sandwich, it can't be grabbed by someone other than me.

[Edema Rue she/her]

On 10/19/2022 at 1:47 PM, AltonicKeys said:

Your actions aren't too outlandish (The sandwich appears in my hand and stays there no matter what)

 

4 minutes ago, ImportantQuestions said:

 it can't be grabbed by someone other than me.

Questions has broken the rules. As a result, he can no longer fight for the sandwich. 

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

35 minutes ago, ImportantQuestions said:

You jumped out of my glove box? But that car is hundreds of miles away in my garage. I'm in Perry's flying car. And the sandwich isn't in my car. It is in Perry's car. And, as per my preferred sandwich, it can't be grabbed by someone other than me.

... Drat. What is this then? I bite into the sandwich, immediately gagging in disgust. It was an ant shaped like a sandwich! I make a sound of annoyance and rent a helicopter to go after Perry and Questions in.

Edited November 21, 2022 by Sequence

[Immortal Platypus]

How did I break the rules?

It's not too outlandish. It can be summoned by something, or fishing rodded or something, it just can't be physically grabbed by someone else. There are a lot of ways I could list, but I'm not going to give you ideas. Think along the lines of the surge of Abrasion. It's not, because neither of my Radiant orders have access to that surge, but it's similar.

Edited November 21, 2022 by ImportantQuestions

[Edema Rue she/her]

Using a magical fishing pole, I snatch the sandwich and reel it in. 

[Immortal Platypus]

That fishing rod must have a long range. I cut the line and use a magical fish to swallow it and bring it back.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

3 hours ago, ImportantQuestions said:

I wondered if anyone was going to notice that. Thanks for noticing it!!! That just made me happy.

I survive because I'm an immortal platypus. I still have the sandwich because Wizard never had it. Nerdy did. I steal the real one (instead of the sawdust decoy @AesSedai318 has) from his corpse and hop into my natural habitat, the nearby burned trees.

However, you misgendered me! I am nonbinary, and I go by They/Them pronouns. I chastise Questions and take the sandwich as recompense. I am able to do this because my powers as the Shard of Randomness resurrected me as a sentient rubber ducky with telekinesis.

Edited November 21, 2022 by NerdyAarakocra

[The Bookwyrm he/him]

I set Nerdy the Rubber Ducky adrift on Miller's Planet from Interstellar and take the sandwich, leaving them adrift on the deadly water world.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

The shadows blind Bookwyrm, and take the sandwich while he is trying to not fall into the water.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

I throw a bucket of lemon juice (with pulp and seeds) onto the shadows. The shadows do not have eyes, but the astronomical waste metaphorically blinds them with rage.
I ask them "How many fingers am I holding up" (It's 14) and run off with the sandwich

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

As the Shard of Randomness, I settle the water world as my Shardworld. I quickly raise an entire civilization in a speed bubble from the Wayne clone, and have the civilization reclaim the sandwich for me.

Edited November 21, 2022 by NerdyAarakocra

[Telrao she/her]

Extremely confused, Telrao accidentally trips Keys on his escape. She apologises, then morphs into a whaleshark and dives under the deep, deep blue sea.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I continue to build up my Shardworld, accidentally giving Autonomy's Men of Red and Gold a crippling addiction to waffles.

[Immortal Platypus]

4 hours ago, Ookla the Nerdy said:

However, you misgendered me! I am nonbinary, and I go by They/Them pronouns. I chastise Questions and take the sandwich as recompense. I am able to do this because my powers as the Shard of Randomness resurrected me as a sentient rubber ducky with telekinesis.

sorry!!

I go to visit the Shardworld and surreptitiously (which obviously means with syrup) take the sandwich and dunk it into a bucket of syrup. Everyone is so disgusted they let me escape into the underworld where even the Shadows can't go without risk.

sorry again Nerdy. just wondering (from everyone), surup or seerup?

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

Just now, ImportantQuestions said:

sorry!!

I go to visit the Shardworld and surreptitiously (which obviously means with syrup) take the sandwich and dunk it into a bucket of syrup. Everyone is so disgusted they let me escape into the underworld where even the Shadows can't go without risk.

sorry again Nerdy. just wondering (from everyone), surup or seerup?

Thanks for apologizing! No hard feelings.
I think that it would be surrep.

I turn the maple syrup into amber, preserving the sandwich and technically fossilizing it.

[Immortal Platypus]

idk why, I guess it's just because I'm a he and everyone I know is a he or she, I just immediately assume everyone goes by he or she. I'm trying to change that.

I attempt to eat the sandwich but the amber is too hard. I just keep escaping in the underworld instead.

[Edema Rue she/her]

Really? How many people do you know? 

Luckily for me, I have experience with fossils. (I spent far too long with Rand and Mat.) I grab a hammer and chisels and begin removing the sandwich. 

[Immortal Platypus]

not enough, but almost all are part of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

You don't even have the fossil sandwich. I do. stop pretending with a clone.

unrelated note, can you clone non-living things or is it just duplication?

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

On 10/19/2022 at 0:47 PM, AltonicKeys said:

The game is simple - The most delicious sandwich ever sits on a hill. You must get the sandwich.
The point is to have fun and be original! Don't just say "I take the sandwich" cuz that's lame and boring.

...

I take the sandwich WITH A DOG

[Edema Rue she/her]

I was just practicing. Taking the fossilized sandwich from Ookla the Omniscient, I start for real.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

                                                                                                                             (Irrelevant)
Unfortunately, the dog was color-blind! This does not matter, but the dog is also blind-blind! They stole a brick instead. Ookla the Ta'veren is working on a brick.

Edited November 22, 2022 by Ookla the Keys

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

Fortunately, the brick was made out of the amber with the sandwich inside.

[The Bookwyrm he/him]

I take a hammer and break the sandwich out of the brick, then escape into the past using a turnstile.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

However, the sandwich does not follow you into the past, making it easy for I, the Shard of Randomness reincarnated as a sentient rubber ducky with telekinesis, to reclaim it.