Having a Bad Day?: Get 'yer Hugs here!!

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

1 minute ago, That1Cellist said:

Then I won't care though. I won't be in pain anymore.

The thing is that the pain won't go away by being emotionless, you will still feel it.

Quote

“We live the same lives!” he yelled at them. “Over and over and over. We make the same mistakes. Kingdoms do the same stupid things. Rulers fail their people time and time again. Men continue to hurt and hate and die and kill!”

[]”What if I think it’s all meaningless?” he demanded with the loud voice of a king. “What if I don’t want it to keep turning? We live our lives by the blood of others! And those others become forgotten. What good is it if everything we know will fade? Great deeds or great tragedies, neither means anything! They will become legends, then those legends will be forgotten, then it will all start over again!”

 

The access key begins to glow, and the sky grows dark. Rand shouts, what if it’s better for this all to end, what if the Light is a lie, and this is all just a punishment? He bellows that none of this matters. He draws in more and more Power, even more than when he cleansed saidin, or when he had created this mountain. He thinks that Lews Therin had been right to kill himself, except he hadn’t gone far enough. He remembers Ilyena’s broken body.

He could feel the palace around him shaking from the earth’s own sobs. Or was that Dragonmount, throbbing from the immense power he had drawn into himself?

He could smell the air thick with blood and soot and death and pain. Or was that just the scent of a dying world, spread before him?

He thinks Lews Therin made a mistake in leaving the world alive after him; there is no escaping the Wheel without ending everything. Aloud, he demands to know why they have to do this again, why he must relive his failures again. He holds more Power than perhaps anyone ever has, and he prepares to use it to end everything.

He would end it. End it all and let men rest, finally, from their suffering. Stop them from having to live over and over again. Why? Why had the Creator done this to them? Why?

Why do we live again? Lews Therin asked, suddenly. His voice was crisp and distinct.

Yes, Rand said, pleading. Tell me. Why?

Maybe… Lews Therin said, shockingly lucid, not a hint of madness to him. He spoke softly, reverently. Why? Could it be… Maybe it’s so that we can have a second chance.

Rand hesitates, and remembers what Tam had said to him about the reason he does his duties being more important than anything else, and the question he had asked:

Why, Rand? Why do you go to battle? What is the point?

Why?

All was still. Even with the tempest, the winds, the crashes of thunder. All was still.

Why? Rand thought with wonder. Because each time we live, we get to love again.

That was the answer. It all swept over him, lives lived, mistakes made, love changing everything. He saw the entire world in his mind’s eye, lit by the glow in his hand. He remembered lives, hundreds of them, thousands of them, stretching to infinity. He remembered love, and peace, and joy, and hope.

I love this quote from the wheel of time, because of what it explains. Because each time after we suffer and fall down, we can get back up and try again. It is why we are given second chances and grace. The wheel of time deals with the idea that people are born back into the pattern after they die, but this can be adapted to life. Because we are given love and grace when we try to change. Becoming hard isn't going to remove the pain, becoming hard isn't the way to not feeling pain. Becoming soft is, because you will feel the pain, but you will know that it will help you to eventually be better. I kind of see trials and pain as a way of knowing what others are going through, because if I have had a similar experience then I can partially know what they are going through. I can't know all that everyone is going through, but I do know some of it and that helps. I can testify that there is a being out there who knows and loves you. And if you choose to turn to him, he will comfort you. 

[That1Cellist he/him]

4 minutes ago, The Wandering Wizard said:

The thing is that the pain won't go away by being emotionless, you will still feel it.

I love this quote from the wheel of time, because of what it explains. Because each time after we suffer and fall down, we can get back up and try again. It is why we are given second chances and grace. The wheel of time deals with the idea that people are born back into the pattern after they die, but this can be adapted to life. Because we are given love and grace when we try to change. Becoming hard isn't going to remove the pain, becoming hard isn't the way to not feeling pain. Becoming soft is, because you will feel the pain, but you will know that it will help you to eventually be better. I kind of see trials and pain as a way of knowing what others are going through, because if I have had a similar experience then I can partially know what they are going through. I can't know all that everyone is going through, but I do know some of it and that helps. I can testify that there is a being out there who knows and loves you. And if you choose to turn to him, he will comfort you. 

I don't want to try again. I don't want to try anymore. I don't want to keep going. What's the point?

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

Just now, That1Cellist said:

I don't want to try again. I don't want to try anymore. I don't want to keep going. What's the point?

The point is to learn again. To love and to help others struggle through life, because it is painful and it is hard. But we are here to help one another and you may not see it, but you have a positive impact on many people's lives. 

Quite honestly though, I don't know how to help you, except to let you know that you are loved. No matter if you don't think you can be or are worthy of it. You are.

[solarcat she/her]

I know this isn't problem isn't insane, but does anyone have any advice on how to make good friends? I don't have friends at school which makes things a bit painful, although I did join an acedemic club recently and now know some people, but they're merely acquaintances :/. I don't know how to make best friends with anybody and it's been nagging me since middle school. 

[Wittles he/him]

18 minutes ago, solarcat93 said:

I know this isn't problem isn't insane, but does anyone have any advice on how to make good friends? I don't have friends at school which makes things a bit painful, although I did join an acedemic club recently and now know some people, but they're merely acquaintances :/. I don't know how to make best friends with anybody and it's been nagging me since middle school. 

I get that. In my experience, I've found that if you just find anyone you can just talk to, build up to being friends. If they're someone you enjoy being around, and they enjoy being around you, you'll just kind of naturally form really good friendships. At least in my experience

 

[InfiniteInsanity she/her]

22 minutes ago, solarcat93 said:

I know this isn't problem isn't insane, but does anyone have any advice on how to make good friends? I don't have friends at school which makes things a bit painful, although I did join an acedemic club recently and now know some people, but they're merely acquaintances :/. I don't know how to make best friends with anybody and it's been nagging me since middle school. 

Be nice to people. Try to talk to people. If you see someone having a hard time reach out even if you don't know them. Generally being nice and respectful has gotten me a decent amount of friends and also people just tend to like you in general.

[SymphonianBookworm she/her]

2 hours ago, solarcat93 said:

I know this isn't problem isn't insane, but does anyone have any advice on how to make good friends? I don't have friends at school which makes things a bit painful, although I did join an acedemic club recently and now know some people, but they're merely acquaintances :/. I don't know how to make best friends with anybody and it's been nagging me since middle school. 

Hang around people who you genuinely like. If they’re any good, I’m sure they’ll see how great you are. Sometimes it takes time and a lot of awkwardness, but I have faith you’ll get there!

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

2 hours ago, solarcat93 said:

I know this isn't problem isn't insane, but does anyone have any advice on how to make good friends? I don't have friends at school which makes things a bit painful, although I did join an acedemic club recently and now know some people, but they're merely acquaintances :/. I don't know how to make best friends with anybody and it's been nagging me since middle school. 

Not particularly because I don't have many at my school and most of mine are also mostly acquaintances

I've only found a real friend through luck and he was sitting alone, so I went and sat next to him. And we became quite fast friends. 

Your problem doesn't have to be insane to be worthy of attention and thought. I hope you can find some who can be truly great friends. *Hugs*

[Wittles he/him]

So I've been feeling kind of really depressed for a while. It kinda sucks, but it was manageable I guess. There was a lot of crazy crap going on in the last half of last year. My dad got back into his alcohol addiction, and my grandma died, so it was really hard emotionally, grades plummeted and all that jazz. It was really hard mentally, but my family got through it. My dad went to rehab, and he's better than I've seen him in years, so it should have been better now right? Unfortunately, about this time, I started to realize I'm not exactly straight, like I'd thought for most of my life. So that has been basically making me have kind of a struggle with religion. I really want to stay a part of the LDS church, but at the same time, I want to be able to accept that part of me. The stress of trying to figure it out has made it hard to sleep a lot. There's a lot of internal conflict that I've been trying to resolve. The scariest part is I've been feeling a little bit suicidal. Just a few nights ago I was legitimately contemplating actually going through with it. It terrified me. I could just really use some reassurance that people actually care that I exist.

Spoiler

Hehe, that got a bit longer than expected

 

Edited February 15, 2023 by Witless of Shinovar

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

4 minutes ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

So I've been feeling kind of really depressed for a while. It kinda sucks, but it was manageable I guess. There was a lot of crazy crap going on in the last half of last year. My dad got back into his alcohol addiction, and my grandma died, so it was really hard emotionally, grades plummeted and all that jazz. It was really hard mentally, but my family got through it. My dad went to rehab, and he's better than I've seen him in years, so it should have been better now right? Unfortunately, about this time, I started to realize I'm not exactly straight, like I'd thought for most of my life. So that has been basically making me have kind of a struggle with religion. I really want to stay a part of the LDS church, but at the same time, I want to be able to accept that part of me. The stress of trying to figure it out has made it hard to sleep a lot. There's a lot of internal conflict that I've been trying to resolve. The scariest part is I've been feeling a little bit suicidal. Just a few nights ago I was legitimately contemplating actually going through with it. It terrified me. I could just really use some reassurance that people actually care that I exist.

  Reveal hidden contents

Hehe, that got a bit longer than expected

 

You are an incredible person Witless. You do have a talent for art and I'm always excited to see more of your art and I can't wait to read some of your stories. We are always here for you and it is perfectly fine to have those feelings, I think that I might have some as well. Idk and it's complicated, but what is most important to always remember is that you are never alone. That is his tactics, remember that we love you and your are never alone, never.

[Immortal Platypus]

*hugs*

I care that you exist! You're so fun to do stuff with, and I LOVE YOUR ART! It's so cool! Please don't hate yourself if you are. I hope you figure out what you're going to do with the Church situation. If there's anything I can do you help, please let me know.

*more hugs*

You're amazing!!!

[kajsa ㅇㅅㅇ she/her]

12 hours ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

So I've been feeling kind of really depressed for a while. It kinda sucks, but it was manageable I guess. There was a lot of crazy crap going on in the last half of last year. My dad got back into his alcohol addiction, and my grandma died, so it was really hard emotionally, grades plummeted and all that jazz. It was really hard mentally, but my family got through it. My dad went to rehab, and he's better than I've seen him in years, so it should have been better now right? Unfortunately, about this time, I started to realize I'm not exactly straight, like I'd thought for most of my life. So that has been basically making me have kind of a struggle with religion. I really want to stay a part of the LDS church, but at the same time, I want to be able to accept that part of me. The stress of trying to figure it out has made it hard to sleep a lot. There's a lot of internal conflict that I've been trying to resolve. The scariest part is I've been feeling a little bit suicidal. Just a few nights ago I was legitimately contemplating actually going through with it. It terrified me. I could just really use some reassurance that people actually care that I exist.

  Reveal hidden contents

Hehe, that got a bit longer than expected

 

Hey, Witless.

That’s pretty rough. And those thoughts really are so so scary—I’ve lately had a few myself. I haven’t, say, considered it, but I get how terrifying those feelings are. 

I also get the struggling with the LDS church thing—not for the same reasons, but I also get that struggling with religion is pretty difficult. I really do hate how some members of the church treat the LGBTQ+ community. That’s one of the problems my family has with the LDS religion/standards/etc. I hope you can find peace, and if you ever need someone  to talk to, I will try my best to help out. And I think I’m pretty good at not judging people, so I’ll throw that out too. 

Is there anything you want us to do?

[SymphonianBookworm she/her]

13 hours ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

So I've been feeling kind of really depressed for a while. It kinda sucks, but it was manageable I guess. There was a lot of crazy crap going on in the last half of last year. My dad got back into his alcohol addiction, and my grandma died, so it was really hard emotionally, grades plummeted and all that jazz. It was really hard mentally, but my family got through it. My dad went to rehab, and he's better than I've seen him in years, so it should have been better now right? Unfortunately, about this time, I started to realize I'm not exactly straight, like I'd thought for most of my life. So that has been basically making me have kind of a struggle with religion. I really want to stay a part of the LDS church, but at the same time, I want to be able to accept that part of me. The stress of trying to figure it out has made it hard to sleep a lot. There's a lot of internal conflict that I've been trying to resolve. The scariest part is I've been feeling a little bit suicidal. Just a few nights ago I was legitimately contemplating actually going through with it. It terrified me. I could just really use some reassurance that people actually care that I exist.

  Reveal hidden contents

Hehe, that got a bit longer than expected

 

We care that you exist. What you're going through is really tough, but the most important things are to be who you are---regardless of what others tell or want you to be---and to remember that there are people out there who really care about you. Whenever you're feeling conflicted or stressed, try to think that everyone on the Shard, and I'm sure people in your home life, will always be there for you if you need us, and that you're a genuinely kind, intelligent, and overall amazing person the world will suffer to lose. 
Please don't go through with it.
If you ever need to talk, i'm always here.

[The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns]

15 hours ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

So I've been feeling kind of really depressed for a while. It kinda sucks, but it was manageable I guess. There was a lot of crazy crap going on in the last half of last year. My dad got back into his alcohol addiction, and my grandma died, so it was really hard emotionally, grades plummeted and all that jazz. It was really hard mentally, but my family got through it. My dad went to rehab, and he's better than I've seen him in years, so it should have been better now right? Unfortunately, about this time, I started to realize I'm not exactly straight, like I'd thought for most of my life. So that has been basically making me have kind of a struggle with religion. I really want to stay a part of the LDS church, but at the same time, I want to be able to accept that part of me. The stress of trying to figure it out has made it hard to sleep a lot. There's a lot of internal conflict that I've been trying to resolve. The scariest part is I've been feeling a little bit suicidal. Just a few nights ago I was legitimately contemplating actually going through with it. It terrified me. I could just really use some reassurance that people actually care that I exist.

  Reveal hidden contents

Hehe, that got a bit longer than expected

 

Depression should never be something you just have to manage. Seek out help if you can get it, specially if you are feeling suicidal. If you're in the U.S., the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 988.

I'm sorry sorry you're going through that struggle. A conflict of identity and belonging is one of the hardest to work through. I'm sure many other people give give better advice than I could on that.

We are all here for you. Don't hesitate to reach out whenever. *hugs*

[Wittles he/him]

I...Thank you. I don't really know what else to say, just thank you all.

Edited February 15, 2023 by Witless of Shinovar

[Immortal Platypus]

You're welcome. You're awesome and don't need to thank me at all.

[SymphonianBookworm she/her]

Me too. I’m happy to help! Well, hopefully I helped. 

[Wittles he/him]

5 hours ago, Kajsa said:

Hey, Witless.

That’s pretty rough. And those thoughts really are so so scary—I’ve lately had a few myself. I haven’t, say, considered it, but I get how terrifying those feelings are. 

I also get the struggling with the LDS church thing—not for the same reasons, but I also get that struggling with religion is pretty difficult. I really do hate how some members of the church treat the LGBTQ+ community. That’s one of the problems my family has with the LDS religion/standards/etc. I hope you can find peace, and if you ever need someone  to talk to, I will try my best to help out. And I think I’m pretty good at not judging people, so I’ll throw that out too. 

Is there anything you want us to do?

I'm not sure. Really just reassurance that I'm not a waste of space.

@SymphonianBookworm, @Being of Cacophony @The Aspiring Archivist @The Wandering Wizard. You all helped. I'm kind of just repeating myself, but thank you all so much.

Spoiler

I do think I need to thank you all for being such awesome people willing to help me

 

Edited February 15, 2023 by Witless of Shinovar

[The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns]

28 minutes ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

I'm not sure. Really just reassurance that I'm not a waste of space.

@SymphonianBookworm, @Being of Cacophony @The Aspiring Archivist @The Wandering Wizard. You all helped. I'm kind of just repeating myself, but thank you all so much.

  Reveal hidden contents

I do think I need to thank you all for being such awesome people willing to help me

 

Well, I promise you aren't. We all value you, and I'm sure there are others out there who do as well. You don't hurt anyone by being around, in fact, you help.

[The Bookwyrm he/him]

18 hours ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

So I've been feeling kind of really depressed for a while. It kinda sucks, but it was manageable I guess. There was a lot of crazy crap going on in the last half of last year. My dad got back into his alcohol addiction, and my grandma died, so it was really hard emotionally, grades plummeted and all that jazz. It was really hard mentally, but my family got through it. My dad went to rehab, and he's better than I've seen him in years, so it should have been better now right? Unfortunately, about this time, I started to realize I'm not exactly straight, like I'd thought for most of my life. So that has been basically making me have kind of a struggle with religion. I really want to stay a part of the LDS church, but at the same time, I want to be able to accept that part of me. The stress of trying to figure it out has made it hard to sleep a lot. There's a lot of internal conflict that I've been trying to resolve. The scariest part is I've been feeling a little bit suicidal. Just a few nights ago I was legitimately contemplating actually going through with it. It terrified me. I could just really use some reassurance that people actually care that I exist.

  Reveal hidden contents

Hehe, that got a bit longer than expected

 

I unfortunately can't say that all people of our religion will always treat people of the LGBTQ+ community respectfully all the time.

But that doesn't mean that there aren't those who do.

Even if the church doesn't fit all the way on that level, it doesn't mean you shouldn't leave. It doesn't mean that you can't accept your place on Earth, as long as you understand that you are more than this life and this experience. I've found so much solace in my life with the simple fact that we existed before we came here and that we will continue to exist afterwards. Things that seem hard and difficult suddenly make sense and have a place in the eternal perspective. You have a place in heaven, as well.

Of course, I'm straight. I don't understand the difficulties that plenty of others that I know face. So my "advice" might seem like no more than the ranting of a self-righteous person who doesn't understand.

But please keep in mind that Christ understands. If you go to him and our Heavenly Father, they understand your position in a way no one else does, and if you ask and listen, they'll guide you through. Think of what good this church has done in your life, and what it can do for you in the next.

And, disregarding all of that, you're still an amazing person who deserves to be happy. You're a cool person, Witless! We love having you on the Shard and interacting with you. 

There are people who love you and want to help you, and if you need professional help, then that's fine too. We're glad you're with us, and we hope that you realize your worth.

[Wittles he/him]

1 minute ago, The Bookwyrm said:

I unfortunately can't say that all people of our religion will always treat people of the LGBTQ+ community respectfully all the time.

But that doesn't mean that there aren't those who do.

Even if the church doesn't fit all the way on that level, it doesn't mean you shouldn't leave. It doesn't mean that you can't accept your place on Earth, as long as you understand that you are more than this life and this experience. I've found so much solace in my life with the simple fact that we existed before we came here and that we will continue to exist afterwards. Things that seem hard and difficult suddenly make sense and have a place in the eternal perspective. You have a place in heaven, as well.

Of course, I'm straight. I don't understand the difficulties that plenty of others that I know face. So my "advice" might seem like no more than the ranting of a self-righteous person who doesn't understand.

But please keep in mind that Christ understands. If you go to him and our Heavenly Father, they understand your position in a way no one else does, and if you ask and listen, they'll guide you through. Think of what good this church has done in your life, and what it can do for you in the next.

And, disregarding all of that, you're still an amazing person who deserves to be happy. You're a cool person, Witless! We love having you on the Shard and interacting with you. 

There are people who love you and want to help you, and if you need professional help, then that's fine too. We're glad you're with us, and we hope that you realize your worth.

Dang, out of rep. *hugs*

 

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

47 minutes ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

I'm not sure. Really just reassurance that I'm not a waste of space.

@SymphonianBookworm, @Being of Cacophony @The Aspiring Archivist @The Wandering Wizard. You all helped. I'm kind of just repeating myself, but thank you all so much.

  Hide contents

I do think I need to thank you all for being such awesome people willing to help me

 

You are welcome! If you don't mind I'll repeat something at you. You are a incredible person and a talented artist.

5 minutes ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

Dang, out of rep. *hugs*

 

I'm out as well

[That1Cellist he/him]

12 minutes ago, The Wandering Wizard said:

You are welcome! If you don't mind I'll repeat something at you. You are a incredible person and a talented artist.

I'm out as well

 

20 minutes ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

Dang, out of rep. *hugs*

 

Hahaha I’ve got rep at least.

[Immortal Platypus]

Now I need emotional support. Backstory:

I don't know how many of you have heard of BOB or battle of the books, but my friends and I signed up for it. We all prepared a lot and were ready.

Today:

Today was the actual battle. It was basically trivia and we had to answer what book it was from. So we did pretty good overall, but in an event you had to take 1st or 2nd to move on, we took 3rd. By one point! One lousy point!! And the worst part is, each question is worth 2 points and we answered wrong that I got right but my team didn't hear me say it and so answered a different answer. The only thing that makes it better is that I beat someone (on the Shard) on a Rithmatist question, so that was awesome.

Hugs appreciated. and any advice/comments.

[Morningtide she/her]

19 hours ago, Witless of Shinovar said:

So I've been feeling kind of really depressed for a while. It kinda sucks, but it was manageable I guess. There was a lot of crazy crap going on in the last half of last year. My dad got back into his alcohol addiction, and my grandma died, so it was really hard emotionally, grades plummeted and all that jazz. It was really hard mentally, but my family got through it. My dad went to rehab, and he's better than I've seen him in years, so it should have been better now right? Unfortunately, about this time, I started to realize I'm not exactly straight, like I'd thought for most of my life. So that has been basically making me have kind of a struggle with religion. I really want to stay a part of the LDS church, but at the same time, I want to be able to accept that part of me. The stress of trying to figure it out has made it hard to sleep a lot. There's a lot of internal conflict that I've been trying to resolve. The scariest part is I've been feeling a little bit suicidal. Just a few nights ago I was legitimately contemplating actually going through with it. It terrified me. I could just really use some reassurance that people actually care that I exist.

  Reveal hidden contents

Hehe, that got a bit longer than expected

 

*hugs* I can't say anything that hasn't already been said but I reiterate everything, especially what Bookwyrm said. *hugs again*

8 minutes ago, Being of Cacophony said:

Now I need emotional support. Backstory:

I don't know how many of you have heard of BOB or battle of the books, but my friends and I signed up for it. We all prepared a lot and were ready.

Today:

Today was the actual battle. It was basically trivia and we had to answer what book it was from. So we did pretty good overall, but in an event you had to take 1st or 2nd to move on, we took 3rd. By one point! One lousy point!! And the worst part is, each question is worth 2 points and we answered wrong that I got right but my team didn't hear me say it and so answered a different answer. The only thing that makes it better is that I beat someone (on the Shard) on a Rithmatist question, so that was awesome.

Hugs appreciated. and any advice/comments.

*hugs* That type of thing always feels terrible, especially when you know you were right! My only advice is just to remember that you are still amazing, even if it didn't go well. All being said, third place is also really awesome, even if it isn't what you wanted!