Having a Bad Day?: Get 'yer Hugs here!!

[Edema Rue she/her]

19 hours ago, The Sibling said:

I just did a science test and it was three pages. The first two pages I think i got everything right, and then the last page had a question which I'd never seen before and I was so confused. I pretty much wrote down nonsense as my answer and I'm just sad because it was going so well and then my brain sort of crash landed right at the end.

That’s the worst! Just remember what you did well. There’s nothing you can change now, so you don’t need to keep worrying about it; if you did good, you did good. If you fail, you fail.

*hugs* 

You’re amazing.

[InfiniteInsanity she/her]

There's this person. They have a bad habit of manipulating people. And they had a bad habit of physically hurting people. And they got better on the second part but not on the first. And something about them my brain has just gotten so used to all the manipulating and everything that it's hard for me to recognize because I'm just used to it. But then because I'm scared I won't recognize it I just kind of shut down a little. 

This person came and sat and talked to me and couple of other people this morning before school and I couldn't take it and I just started to slowly shut down. And then when they left I just kept shutting down and I couldn't stop it which freaked me out which made me break down. 

But I've also noticed that if I can connect anything people say or do to something that person did in the past I start to shut down too. And I have no control over those connections and I don't know what to do about it. I could literally shut down at any moment because of any little thing someone did.

I want it to stop but I don't know how.

[Immortal Platypus]

*hugs*

Uh... I'm not exactly sure what to say here. The only thing I can think is to have a talk with the person and see if they're trying to improve on the first part. If they are, I think (I hope might be a better term) your mind will calm down a little bit. If they're not, I'd just ask them to try to improve. Sorry if that's not helpful. I don't really know what to say. 

[The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns]

55 minutes ago, InfiniteInsanity said:

There's this person. They have a bad habit of manipulating people. And they had a bad habit of physically hurting people. And they got better on the second part but not on the first. And something about them my brain has just gotten so used to all the manipulating and everything that it's hard for me to recognize because I'm just used to it. But then because I'm scared I won't recognize it I just kind of shut down a little. 

This person came and sat and talked to me and couple of other people this morning before school and I couldn't take it and I just started to slowly shut down. And then when they left I just kept shutting down and I couldn't stop it which freaked me out which made me break down. 

But I've also noticed that if I can connect anything people say or do to something that person did in the past I start to shut down too. And I have no control over those connections and I don't know what to do about it. I could literally shut down at any moment because of any little thing someone did.

I want it to stop but I don't know how.

*hugs*

I'm not sure about this either. I've had my own experiences with shutting down, and sometimes it's hard to address because addressing it or talking to the person could make you shut down.

It would be a good idea to check in with this person like @Being of Cacophony said. If that's too stressful, maybe message them online or something to avoid a direct confrontation. If you can't manage either of those, try talking to someone else who you trust about it, it can really help to express it to someone and talk it through. I'm sure plenty of people, including myself, would be glad to listen on here, although it could really help to talk to someone in person.

Take care of yourself, you'll get through this.

[Wittles he/him]

On 1/13/2023 at 4:59 PM, Kajsa said:

Hi.

New in this thread, but I definitely need to get 'ma hugs.

I've had... a ROUGH time lately. I'm constantly stressed and overwhelmed even when I have no homework or tests or show choir competitions or friend issues.

I sprained my ankle late August last year (the 29th) and I'm still having issues; saw four different doctors, three physical therapists, got a ton of x-rays and MRIs... nothing. But somehow it still manages to feel like there's a thorny dagger stuck in my ankle/foot/shin region. This has caused me to have to sit out of show choir rehearsal a LOT. I was sitting out all of show choir again today (as in sitting out the whole time, hadn't danced AT ALL) and I heard someone say my name, so I looked up, thinking it was one of my friends come to check on me. Turns out it was Annabelle's little brother who said, "Hey, your dancing's been awesome today!" He meant it as a joke, but I still nearly cried. I managed to force a smile and then I went back to drawing on my music.

I get home at night sometimes and I just fall apart. There are spells where I can't handle any social interaction, and I get frustrated at people when they try to talk to me. Some days I get messages and I open them and stare at them and then even though I love the person who sent it to me, I turn off my phone and just... don't respond. I don't know. I've just been struggling a lot.

There's more but this is already a plenty long rant ;P

Hewp. 

This is definitely a bit late, but I might be able to help at least a little bit. I didn't sprain my ankle, but I hurt my back bad, I mean really bad like a year ago. It's better, but it still hurts a lot. I used to do a lot of sports, but now, most of the time it's all I can do to stay standing. That also seriously affected my mental health, along with moving to a new school. I had a really hard time motivating myself to do anything. Hell, I still have a hard time motivating myself to do anything. It sucks. Injuries suck, people don't care, but you still get the feeling that they're watching you sit out and not do things that cause so much pain and judging you for not joining in. (well most don't care). In the end, I've found that it's worth it to stay in contact with the people you care about. It really helps to have someone to talk to who isn't judgmental. Praying also helps a lot. 

Sorry, That might have gotten a bit ranty, and I have no idea if this will actually help, but I hope I was able to do something good.

[Edema Rue she/her]

On 1/30/2023 at 1:31 PM, InfiniteInsanity said:

There's this person. They have a bad habit of manipulating people. And they had a bad habit of physically hurting people. And they got better on the second part but not on the first. And something about them my brain has just gotten so used to all the manipulating and everything that it's hard for me to recognize because I'm just used to it. But then because I'm scared I won't recognize it I just kind of shut down a little. 

This person came and sat and talked to me and couple of other people this morning before school and I couldn't take it and I just started to slowly shut down. And then when they left I just kept shutting down and I couldn't stop it which freaked me out which made me break down. 

But I've also noticed that if I can connect anything people say or do to something that person did in the past I start to shut down too. And I have no control over those connections and I don't know what to do about it. I could literally shut down at any moment because of any little thing someone did.

I want it to stop but I don't know how.

I’m not always the best with human, but the best I can say is to try to think through the things they say. Step back and look at the situation from a distance when you aren’t with them. Imagine they’re a book character? 

That sounds really nerdy, but it’s easier to do these things when it doesn’t feel as directly related to you.

[Shining Silhouette he/him]

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

16 minutes ago, Shining Silhouette said:

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

As you know I am here for you, always my friend. *Hugs*

I'd give everyone I knew was having a bad time if they were all near my. My message to all of you is that you are loved. Even if you don't believe that god loves you, know that I will love you just for who you are.

[The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns]

38 minutes ago, Shining Silhouette said:

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

*hugs*

That sucks. Remember that you can always say if you're feeling down, on here and in real life, if you're comfortable with it.

I'm glad you're feeling better! Contentment is good. There's no need to expect or hope for a constant intense happiness, that's pretty unrealistic. Feeling content means stability, and stability is good.

As for the family issue, it's good that you've come to terms with the situation. You can hope that things will get better, but if they stay just okay that's fine too.

Like Wizard said, we're always here for you.

[Wittles he/him]

1 hour ago, Shining Silhouette said:

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

*Hugs*

I actually had something like that also happen recently. It's hard. I'm glad that we are people you considered good enough friends that you could talk to about this. (Even though I'm fairly new) I really hope things get better for you. Until then, here's some more hugs. *sends more virtual hugs*

[Edema Rue she/her]

8 hours ago, Shining Silhouette said:

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

Consider hugs given. You deserve them. 

1 hour ago, Szeth's Facepalm said:

ok tw for erm a lot of stuff. suicide attempt depression self harm parents. lotsa crem. (i'm sorry for dumping all of this here, this started as a rant about my dad but it turned into the massive vent session i've needed for like a year.)

  Reveal hidden contents

i'm having a really hard time with my dad lately. every interaction i have with him is so incredibly frustrating and difficult. I've been visibly having a hard time with stuff lately, getting bad grades and struggling to keep up with my responsibilities, but internally i am doing the best that i have since 2019 (when a family member of mine died and my depression and suicidal thoughts started, and didn't get better until pretty much September 2022). i'm still harboring anger at him and my mother for not being there for me when i needed them and basically ignoring every warning sign from me that i was suffering (something i can see that they are also doing to my little brother, and i want to do something about it but i just can't. i cannot spend my emotional energy on them right now.) and now my dad is upset with me for struggling, but i am upset with him because he just can't seem to understand how much I've improved and gotten better. i am just so far from where i was a year ago. I used to hurt myself a lot because it felt like an outlet (i don't know why. i can't explain.) and i haven't done that since school started. January 3 was actually the 1 year anniversary of when i almost attempted suicide, i'd come very close so many times over the past two years but i can still remember exactly how close i was this time. i had everything planned out. i'd started a letter to my parents, i knew exactly how i was going to do it and i had gotten everything i'd need and it was all just right there. it scares me so much when i think about it. every time i read my journal entries where i am spiraling into the head space where i am genuinely planning to take my own life i start shaking all over (i am shaking thinking about it now). i can barely remember wanting to do it anymore! i am so so far away from that and i just wish i could explain that to my parents, i wish i could explain that i'm just doing so much better, and i want to tell them about all the little things i can do again because i'm better and healthy, like listening to my favorite songs because they don't make me cry anymore, and being excited about things in the future because now i think there is going to be a future, but any mention of mental or emotional upsetness, and for gods sake sometimes physical (like when i mentioned how i've been begging to go to dermatologist for years for my painful eczema or when i asked for glasses and said how i haven't been able to see well for a while), sends them into this fit about how lucky we are and how ungrateful we are because we have the best family in the world and we are selfish and delusional for feeling any sort of mental (or fricking physical) unstability. and i wish them saying that cured everything i've ever felt but the truth is it just doesn't, and they refuse to understand anything i try to explain to them because they are so convinced that they are right that they won't even consider that there is truth to what i am saying, so i am always upset with them in the back of my mind and whenever we interact it just comes out in tiny bits (or big bits) and it's now at the point where most of the time i am talking to my dad and half the time i am talking to my mom i feel physically sick because i just cannot communicate to them what is wrong, so being upset with them, aside from being mentally and emotionally exhausting is also physically painful and sickening. and my dad refuses to see that i may be struggling visibly now but i am doing so so much better than i was and that makes it worse because he is always mad at me about something and never happy or impressed with anything i accomplish.

i'm sorry, that was a lot longer and a lot heavier then i intended but it just feels so so good to get off my chest. i'm really grateful for all of you guys here. you all listen to me when my friends and my family won't, and it's so easy to talk to you all. genuinely thank you so much.

You don’t need to be sorry for venting. Like all humans, you deserve the right to speak and be heard. I’m sorry that isn’t happening at home. Like with all complex problems, there isn’t some simple solution. Try remember where you were, and where you are now. People can’t read minds, and they rarely have the time to learn to care. I know that doesn’t help anything; I’ve had my own parent issues, and nothing can make them be the kind of parent we want to have. 

Even though it’s rough, you are loved, by them and others. Even though it hurts, you can push through. You’re awesome. If those thoughts come back, there are people here and in the real world who care about you and will help. 

[Szeth's Facepalm]

Thank you guys so much. I really appreciate you.

also it was late and i was upset and i kind of overshared ;-; sorry ;-; gunna just maybe hide that post ahaha

[That1Cellist he/him]

17 hours ago, Shining Silhouette said:

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

*Hugs* I'm glad that you were able to have a good day yesterday. I'm sorry that you've been having such a rough time. Good luck, man. If you need us, we're here for you.

 

[Casual Elantris Enjoyer]

I'm going through a really really bad section of life right now

I need your whole stock

Edited February 14, 2023 by Casual Elantris Enjoyer

[Szeth's Facepalm]

5 minutes ago, Casual Elantris Enjoyer said:

I'm going through a really really bad section of mental health right now

I need your whole stock

*hugs hugs hugs hugs hugs and oreos and Raoden and more hugs* i'm so sorry :(

Spoiler

omg i forgot about your Marsh i will get that to you soon!!!

 

[Casual Elantris Enjoyer]

Just now, Szeth's Facepalm said:

*hugs hugs hugs hugs hugs and oreos and Raoden and more hugs* i'm so sorry

  Hide contents

omg i forgot about your Marsh i will get that to you soon!!!

 

Thank u bestie  

Spoiler

OH YOUR SZETH IS DONE ONE SEC LEMME GRAB HIM 

 

[Edema Rue she/her]

2 hours ago, Casual Elantris Enjoyer said:

I'm going through a really really bad section of mental health right now

I need your whole stock

*hugs, understanding, unconditional love, care, bacon*

You are an amazing human, even when you fail or others mess things up. You are loved, no matter what happens. There are people who care. Hold on! Get out of your head and make yourself see the people who care about you.

[S. Stormy she/her]

On 2/4/2023 at 10:31 AM, Aes Sedai said:

Hold on!

...Is it bad that I read this as Hoid on?

[PyroPhile]

Can I have a hug?

[InfiniteInsanity she/her]

7 hours ago, PyroPhile said:

Can I have a hug?

*hug*

[The Bookwyrm he/him]

Hello, peoples.

I think our good friend InfiniteInsanity could use some hugs.

If you see this, could you @ her with some helpful kind words?

[Shining Silhouette he/him]

@InfiniteInsanity, I'm genuinely glad that you're on the shard. I can tell that you care about people and want to help. That's a special gift! And I'm really grateful for your help for me, personally. 

PLUS you helped make THIS which I laugh about at least once a week with my friends. That definitely makes you good in my book 

Quote

Zero Mos. One Moose. Two Meese. Three or more Meesen.

Zero Gos. One Goose. Two Geese. Three or more Geesen.

Zero Shop. One Shoop. Two Sheep. Three or more Sheepen.

Zero Oux (pronounced "oo" like in Demoux and Renoux). One Ox. Two Oxes. Three or more Oxen.

Zero Foux. One Fox. Two Foxes. Three or more Foxen.

Zero Boux. One Box. Two Boxes. Three or more Boxen.

Zero Mus. One Mouse. Two Mice. Three or more Meeses (Reference the song about Scrooge in A Muppet Christmas Carol).

 

Brilliant! Just brilliant!!

[That1Cellist he/him]

Wait a second, the insane one needs hugs? Why didn't she say so?

That's... Insane of her.

@InfiniteInsanity

*hugs*

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. As usual, I don't know what to say. I don't have words. But we're here for you if you need us, okay?

You'll be alright.

Edited February 6, 2023 by That1Cellist

[Edema Rue she/her]

@InfiniteInsanity, you are amazing. You’re super fun to RP with, and it’s easy to tell that you’re so talented. We’re always here for you, and I’m so glad that you’re on the shard! Breathe through it. You’re strong. You can get through it.

[InfiniteInsanity she/her]

3 hours ago, The Bookwyrm said:

Hello, peoples.

I think our good friend InfiniteInsanity could use some hugs.

If you see this, could you @ her with some helpful kind words?

 

2 hours ago, Shining Silhouette said:

@InfiniteInsanity, I'm genuinely glad that you're on the shard. I can tell that you care about people and want to help. That's a special gift! And I'm really grateful for your help for me, personally. 

PLUS you helped make THIS which I laugh about at least once a week with my friends. That definitely makes you good in my book 

Brilliant! Just brilliant!!

 

2 hours ago, That1Cellist said:

Wait a second, the insane one needs hugs? Why didn't she say so?

That's... Insane of her.

@InfiniteInsanity

*hugs*

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. As usual, I don't know what to say. I don't have words. But we're here for you if you need us, okay?

You'll be alright.

 

2 hours ago, Aes Sedai said:

@InfiniteInsanity, you are amazing. You’re super fun to RP with, and it’s easy to tell that you’re so talented. We’re always here for you, and I’m so glad that you’re on the shard! Breathe through it. You’re strong. You can get through it.

...

Thank you. I really needed it today.