The Battle for the Sandwich

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

"Yes, I'd like the Pasta Alfred. And could we get the artichoke dip to share?"

[AltonicKeys he/him]

As I no longer have a job, I sit down to leech off of everyone else's food.

[Immortal Platypus]

Unfortunately, you shot the tracker into the fake sandwich that Alpha gave to Altonic Keys. I wasn't at the table, after all. And the shadows stole a sandwich from some poor individual named Cacaphony. I, clearly, am Platypus.

[Edema Rue she/her]

The Caterpillar began drinking the souls of the long dead grasshoppers. It developed a mouth and smiled in satisfaction. Souls taste lovely, It conveyed.

[Immortal Platypus]

"Souls are good. I rarely take the ones of grasshoppers but I'll try them some time." Platypus says, smiling, happy that he finally organized a meal to make up for the one he interrupted.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

name changes.

The shadows realize their mistake, and take the sandwich from Platypus.

[Wittles he/him]

I use a flashlight to make the shadows disappear and take the sandwich

[Immortal Platypus]

I scold you for interupting a dinner. You feel bad and give the sandwich back to me.

[The Paradoxical Phenomenon he/him]

Spoiler alert but

Spoiler

The story ends with me in complete possession of the true original sandwich.

It’s in bold, so it’s canon.

Get wrecked.

Edited February 8, 2023 by TheAlpha929

[Wittles he/him]

I apologize and take the sandwich back. I escape in my batmobile

[Immortal Platypus]

Your batmobile breaks down and when you get out to fix it, it drives back and gives me the sandwich.

19 minutes ago, TheAlpha929 said:

Spoiler alert but

  Reveal hidden contents

The story ends with me in complete possession of the true original sandwich.

It’s in bold, so it’s canon.

Get wrecked.

Joke's on you, I break canon all the time. Gottem.

[Edema Rue she/her]

The Caterpillar calmly continued drinking the souls of grasshoppers.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

Clouds roll in. The sky darkens. Thunder flashes. A deep booming voice bellows: "Rule 3: Your actions aren't too outlandish."

@TheAlpha929 gets struck by lightning.

The clouds part.

[The Paradoxical Phenomenon he/him]

Uhhh… am I out?

[Immortal Platypus]

not really. just don't do it again

[Edema Rue she/her]

They all sound mean but don’t worry, we’ve all been yelled at about rules at some point.

[SymphonianBookworm she/her]

As someone gets struck lightning, Symph quietly snatches the sandwich away, replacing it with a sentient mushroom. She then runs away, proceeding to mumble something about a precious.

Edited February 9, 2023 by SymphonianBookworm
Why have a mushroom when it can be a sentient mushroom instead?

[Edema Rue she/her]

The Caterpillar climbs on top of the sentient mushroom.

[Immortal Platypus]

Platypus, feeling the weight of a sentient being differently then the weight of the sandwich, chases after Symph and takes the sandwich back after a quick lyting. "We can resume this after dinner is over. Don't worry, it'll be over soon."

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

14 hours ago, Aes Sedai said:

They all sound mean but don’t worry, we’ve all been yelled at about rules at some point.

Except me! I have never broken a rule and never will!

The Sandwich appears in my hand and I eat it.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

I pry open your mouth and grab the sandwich before it is damaged, and put a full lemon in your mouth instead.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Well, at least Rule number 1 and 3 didn't murder me for my misdeeds! I pull out my Sandwich magnet and attempt to steal the Sandwich again, quickly swallowing the lemon before my mouth implodes.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

your mouth implodes anyway, causing the magnet to inverse and fling the Sandwich to the Shadows.

[Immortal Platypus]

I wonder why there is a Sandwich magnet. I realize I invented it, pull out my control switch, and send the sandwich towards me.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

But we screwed up the planet so bad, the magnetic field was inverted. You push the sandwich away from the two of you and towards me.

Because that's how magnets work.