The Battle for the Sandwich

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

7 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Uhh...

*googles what that is*

Oh those'd make terrible weapons

Light is bad at breaking stuff if it's in the visible spectrum 

And these things are very visible

Also I choose to use The Strong Nuclear Force

Nononono

Lightsabers only. Whatever configuration you choose. I’m using double-bladed. These are my terms. 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 minute ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Nononono

Lightsabers only. Whatever configuration you choose. I’m using double-bladed. These are my terms. 

Uhh 

I choose Gamma Ray

And Strong Nuclear Force

Is it fight until one yields?

Also does cancer count as a wound?

[Unintelligenius he/him]

1 minute ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Uhh 

I choose Gamma Ray

And Strong Nuclear Force

Is it fight until one yields?

Also does cancer count as a wound?

I take the Sandwich while everyone is distracted by the duel preparations.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

Just now, Uninteligenius said:

I take the Sandwich while everyone is distracted by the duel preparations.

It's in a safe though

[Unintelligenius he/him]

Just now, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

It's in a safe though

I just grab the safe that the Sandwich is in and run to the middle of Alaska.

[SpartanBrigade He/Him]

14 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Uhh...

*googles what that is*

Oh those'd make terrible weapons

Light is bad at breaking stuff if it's in the visible spectrum 

And these things are very visible

Nuh uh
You know what a lightsaber is 
Don't lie to us

I break into the vault and run away with the Sandwich 

Edited August 17, 2025 by SpartanBrigade

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

2 minutes ago, SpartanBrigade said:

I break into the vault and run away with the Sandwich 

How though

It's SIM

2 minutes ago, Uninteligenius said:

I just grab the safe that the Sandwich is in and run to the middle of Alaska.

I slide tackle you and steal the safe back

Edited August 17, 2025 by KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

44 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Uhh 

I choose Gamma Ray

And Strong Nuclear Force

Is it fight until one yields?

Also does cancer count as a wound?

These are not the terms of a duel I agree to. If I make a Star Wars reference it must be a Star Wars weapon at least lol

39 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

How though

It's SIM

I slide tackle you and steal the safe back

You have no idea how easy a slide tackle is to mess up. Well, I’d assume so based on how often people mess it up trying to get me but whatever. I’m smart enough to not try that

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

3 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

These are not the terms of a duel I agree to. If I make a Star Wars reference it must be a Star Wars weapon at least lol

Then what are my options

If there's no gamma ray...

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

9 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Then what are my options

If there's no gamma ray...

Idk lightsaber, blaster gun, rocket launcher even, Star Wars type tank for all I care

No star cruisers, but a one person star fighter I would accept (assuming I can use the force on small parts of it)

You could even summon an army of non-force users (perhaps up to 100), but know that I would use the force on them with little moderation. 

Really anything vaguely reasonable

But lightsabers function mostly like shardblades but with a lot of cool things they never incorporated into the movies…

And they’re easier to turn on and off.

Edited August 17, 2025 by ChipsAHoid

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

4 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

But lightsabers function mostly like shardblades but with a lot of cool things they never incorporated into the movies…

And they’re easier to turn on and off.

But is there anything forbidding a gamma ray one?

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

1 minute ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

But is there anything forbidding a gamma ray one?

Yes

At least they don’t exist to my knowledge

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

Just now, ChipsAHoid said:

Yes

At least they don’t exist to my knowledge

Ahh

So I can have one

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

8 hours ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Ahh

So I can have one

Can you give me canonical evidence of one?

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

11 hours ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Uhh...

*googles what that is*

Oh those'd make terrible weapons

Light is bad at breaking stuff if it's in the visible spectrum 

And these things are very visible

Also I choose to use The Strong Nuclear Force

Have you seriously never watched Star Wars?

[Vielence She/Her]

12 hours ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

I take away @KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren's ability to code because this is getting out of hand.

THANK YOU

5 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Have you seriously never watched Star Wars?

Hey I didn’t until 2 years ago. 
 

Comes up to whoever currently has the sandwich bc I’ve lost track, and challenges them to an insult battle.

Raise your hand if you know what that is

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

8 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Can you give me canonical evidence of one?

Uhh...

No

6 hours ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Have you seriously never watched Star Wars?

No

I think I might've watched the opening credits once or something like that

6 hours ago, VieB13 said:

THANK YOU

Hey I didn’t until 2 years ago. 
 

Comes up to whoever currently has the sandwich bc I’ve lost track, and challenges them to an insult battle.

Raise your hand if you know what that is

I have the sandwich.

In a safe. 

And I'm going to school in 15 minutes so... no time.

[Vielence She/Her]

6 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Uhh...

No

No

I think I might've watched the opening credits once or something like that

I have the sandwich.

In a safe. 

And I'm going to school in 15 minutes so... no time.

Ok let’s do it now. 
… 

please tell me you know what it is?

Stands in front of the safe and says that if I win the insult battle you give me the sandwich if your own free will, destroy all copies of anything that is even slightly involved in creating more safes, codes or other things like that, and that I have a 5min head start to run away with the sandwich.

What is your request for if you win?

Try to find a loophole in that I dare you. 
this is a skill of mine. 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 minute ago, VieB13 said:

Ok let’s do it now. 
… 

please tell me you know what it is?

Stands in front of the safe and says that if I win the insult battle you give me the sandwich if your own free will, destroy all copies of anything that is even slightly involved in creating more safes, codes or other things like that, and that I have a 5min head start to run away with the sandwich.

What is your request for if you win?

Try to find a loophole in that I dare you. 
this is a skill of mine. 

Destroying all copies....

Accepted.

But I'd better be going so not right now.

~8 hours, if you're awake

[Vielence She/Her]

1 minute ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Destroying all copies....

Accepted.

But I'd better be going so not right now.

~8 hours, if you're awake

 Ahem. I will not be awake definitely not then no.

Also you didn’t tell me what you wanted in return. You have to before we commence. 
 

Then I rewrite the challenge to make sure all points are hit then we can begin. 

 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

8 hours ago, VieB13 said:

 Ahem. I will not be awake definitely not then no.

Also you didn’t tell me what you wanted in return. You have to before we commence. 
 

Then I rewrite the challenge to make sure all points are hit then we can begin. 

 

Uhh...

I wish nothing of you

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

17 hours ago, VieB13 said:

Ok let’s do it now. 
… 

please tell me you know what it is?

Stands in front of the safe and says that if I win the insult battle you give me the sandwich if your own free will, destroy all copies of anything that is even slightly involved in creating more safes, codes or other things like that, and that I have a 5min head start to run away with the sandwich.

What is your request for if you win?

Try to find a loophole in that I dare you. 
this is a skill of mine. 

Spoiler

I would change to: 

If I win the insult battle you give me the sandwich of your own free will, irreparably destroy anything that is even slightly involved in creating more safes, codes, SIM or other things like that with the exception of things created by those who oppose you, never involve yourself or others under your control with them again, and that I have a 5min head start to run away with the sandwich.

Unbeknownst to all, I unlock the safe, open it, remove the sandwich, place a hot dog in it, close the safe, then lock it. 

Edited August 18, 2025 by Ashkaloda

[Vielence She/Her]

12 hours ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Uhh...

I wish nothing of you

Ok but you can't cash it in later. Now or nothing. 

4 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

  Reveal hidden contents

I would change to: 

If I win the insult battle you give me the sandwich of your own free will, irreparably destroy anything that is even slightly involved in creating more safes, codes, SIM or other things like that with the exception of things created by those who oppose you, never involve yourself or others under your control with them again, and that I have a 5min head start to run away with the sandwich.

Unbeknownst to all, I unlock the safe, open it, remove the sandwich, place a hot dog in it, close the safe, then lock it. 

Ok so 1) thats really good and 2) NO

I spin around as your closing the safe and use a throwing knife to snag the sandwich and pull it back with a piece of string. 

Once I have it in my hand I use a dust bomb to cover my escape.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

35 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

Ok but you can't cash it in later. Now or nothing. 

Ok so 1) thats really good and 2) NO

I spin around as your closing the safe and use a throwing knife to snag the sandwich and pull it back with a piece of string. 

Once I have it in my hand I use a dust bomb to cover my escape.

I just thought how would I get around this and then tried to patch the holes I found. 

I throw a temper tantrum because you ignored the first word of my writing. 

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

3 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

I just thought how would I get around this and then tried to patch the holes I found. 

I throw a temper tantrum because you ignored the first word of my writing. 

I offer you a cookie in compensation. HEY NO STOP CHECKING FOR HEMALURGIC SPIKES I SWEAR THERE’S NONE