Tournament: Cosmere Character Roast Battles

[AonEne he/him]

You guys are seriously great at this.

[+Sorana she/her]

That was a great round. I'm not sure who I'll vote for.
*goes back and reads the entries again*

[Toaster Retribution he/him]

If you vote for Axies, he will make Aimia great again. 

[I think I am here. he/him]

Vote Taln! He's only a bit crazy. 

[Mistspren she/her]

Vote Arclo, he’s a real Aimian who everybody thinks is crazy!

I’m just kidding, you can vote for whoever you want. They are all good choices.

[Toaster Retribution he/him]

8 minutes ago, Mistspren said:

Vote Arclo, he’s a real Aimian who everybody thinks is crazy!

I’m just kidding, you can vote for whoever you want. They are all good choices.

Racism towards Siah Aimians! 

I agree though. Everyone was good. 

Edited August 31, 2018 by Toaster Retribution

[Ashspren]

And the winner is... @I think I am here., with Taln! 

~~~ 

Cograts to all of our Primaries winners! @Herowannabe @Archer @Edgedancer Jak @I think I am here. — I’ll post the first match of the semifinals in 24 hours or less.

[Mistspren she/her]

Congrats, Itiah! You had a great rap.

[Toaster Retribution he/him]

Congrats @I think I am here. Yours was great! Good job the rest of you as well!

[I think I am here. he/him]

Aye! Bows,

Thank you all!

[Rhapsody she/her]

Good job to all of you. Your raps were great.

[I think I am here. he/him]

Honestly, I'm a little scared of getting Jak right now.

[+Sorana she/her]

On 1.9.2018 at 1:52 AM, I think I am here. said:

Honestly, I'm a little scared of getting Jak right now.

I can definitly understand that...
He is a strong opponent. His rap was great.

 

Edited September 2, 2018 by Sorana

[Ashspren]

And the first group of the semifinals is... 

@Herowannabe, with Stick!

@Edgedancer Jak, with Lift! 

Let the first match of the semifinals... BEGIN!

[Herowannabe he/him]

14 hours ago, Ashspren said:

And the first group of the semifinals is... 

@Herowannabe, with Stick!

@Edgedancer Jak, with Lift! 

Let the first match of the semifinals... BEGIN!

How long do we have to post our raps? My schedule is a little crazy with it being Labor Day weekend, so I want to make sure I give myself enough time to do it.  

[Ashspren]

8 hours ago, Herowannabe said:

How long do we have to post our raps? My schedule is a little crazy with it being Labor Day weekend, so I want to make sure I give myself enough time to do it.  

48 hours.

[Ishar]

I would enter for the next round, but I feel like I would end up insulting people's choice of character instead of the actual character. 

[Edgedancer Jak]

Whaaaat?! I'm actually ready on time?? 

I was actually kind of hoping I'd be ready first so I could steal some of your potential "ick" rhymes @Herowannabe. 

Here's Lift!

Spoiler

 

Back again for more Lift!

Like to float? I’ma set you adrift.

 

Hullo, Stick, welcome to my game,

 

Get ready to change, you’ll never be the same,

If I’d been the Lightweaver, you’d’ve burst into flames,

Then cooked my dinner, you’d be ashy remains.

You think you can win? Sure isn’t brains you’ve been hoggin’.

You gotta lotta lunks in yer nogginin’,

 

Now break it down, Voidbringer! Guest rap, go!

 

“I’m not a Voidbringer! And... Is that a twig you’re talking to?”

That’s not a rap! Try again.

“Mistress, I really don’t see the--”

You have to do what I say, I captured you!

“You didn’t--! Sigh… I miss my chairs.”

Eh, good enough.

We’re the best of the tough!

We protect the ignored

And do it in form,

You won’t even keep a poor

Crying lost girl warm!

 

Listen, FishStick,

 

You’re gonna be sick,

You’re words are just ick,

They stumble, so thick,

They’ve got no Slick,

I’d give ya some tips,

But there’s too much to fix.

 

You’re barely enough to cook my lavis,

No mouth to speak with, you’re just a novice,

I've got the Words, the skills, the Shardfork,

One day maybe you could be a wine cork.

I’m walking away, just try to follow,

With nothing to stand on, your words are just hollow.

 

[Herowannabe he/him]

@Edgedancer Jak

Going first or last

It doesn't really matter

I'm still gonna blast

You and serve you on a platter.

Spoiler

Step aside little girl

I’ll show you how it’s done

I’m the best in the world

When it comes to makin’ fun

 

I’m Stick and now I’m back

And of course I’m bound to

Give flak and talk some smack

And outright CRUSH Round Two

 

Shallan and the lame spren?

They were just a warm up

Make way for the flame spren

Watch them as they form up

 

You’re about to get burned

And by the time I’m through

There’ll be a lesson learned

No one needs it more’n you

 

Whaddya think you’re doin’

Stealing all my “-ick” rhymes?

It still won’t help you win

Best stick with two-bit crimes

 

Take me barbecuing?

Try it once or six times

Won’t find what you’re pursuing

Look elsewhere for enzymes

 

You say I’m just a twig?

Well I’m still smarter’n you

You’re dumber than a pig

And I’mma prove it too

 

‘Can’t tell your little spren

From a bad voidbringer

You think you’re only ten

‘Can’t count past your fingers

 

That’s just a thing called math

It’s not hard it’s easy

Now go and take a bath

Your stench makes me queasy

 

You love your awesomeness

So proud you can be sleek

That’s nothing ominous

You’re just a little freak

 

You don’t know how to fight

Can’t even swing a weapon

D’you think yourself a Knight?

Under that impression?

 

Couldn’t be more wronger

Use your pow’rs I dare you

You’ll just make me stronger

‘Grow some vines and snare you

 

You can elude Darkness

(With help from your Gawx friend)

Can’t dodge my rhymes’ sharpness

They’ll cut you in the end

 

You’d like to eat my lunch

But I’ll eat YOU for dinner

I’ve got a sneaky hunch

I’m gonna be the winner.

 

 

[Ashspren]

Here’s the link! 

https://goo.gl/forms/D300kgUJcQphBxBg2

VOTE VOTE VOTE!

[Kidpen he/him]

But they're both so good.... 

Oh well. Sorry Hero. I think Lift's guest rap won it for me. 

[Herowannabe he/him]

27 minutes ago, Kidpen said:

But they're both so good.... 

Oh well. Sorry Hero. I think Lift's guest rap won it for me. 

Fair enough. I was considering doing my own guest rap, but there weren’t a lot of choices (Treebeard the Ent maybe?) plus is was getting late at night and I couldn’t brain anymore.  

[Edgedancer Jak]

1 hour ago, Herowannabe said:

I was considering doing my own guest rap, but there weren’t a lot of choices (Treebeard the Ent maybe?)

Haha that would've been great! "I'll see your Wyndle and raise you a Treebeard."

[Kidpen he/him]

14 minutes ago, Herowannabe said:

Fair enough. I was considering doing my own guest rap, but there weren’t a lot of choices (Treebeard the Ent maybe?) plus is was getting late at night and I couldn’t brain anymore.  

Ugh, now I'm second guessing myself. Yours was seriously good as well. I definitely hope you both come back again at some point so I can read more wonderful raps.

[+Sorana she/her]

That was a really hard decision!

They were both so good.