Having a Bad Day? Stop here for a Good Rant!

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Well, there's a super-nice library in Provo... Just sayin'...

No seriously. The Provo Library is the best.

Is it hiring recent college grads right now? If not, then it cannot be "the best" in my book. The best library is the one that gives me a job.

[Delightful]

Ugh. Living at home.

Mother: Delightful, you've left mess around and its inconveniencing me. Clean it up.

Me: *cleans it. Notices that belongings left in public space last night has been dumped on my floor*.

Me: Mum, if my stuffs in the way and you want to move it, please don't dump my stuff on the floor.

Mother: If you leave stuff dumped around I'll dump it on your floor.

Thanks mum. Way to go. Way to show respect for other people's property. Way to showcase how you want your own space treated.

Seriously. Show respect and it will be reciprocated. Bully tactics don't work and aren't appreciated.

Disclaimer: I fully recognise this is a first world problem and I'm privileged to be able to have my parents around and live at home. It's still super irritating.

Kobold: ouch. I'm sorry. :/.

Ninja edit: Twi, noooo . *hugs*.

Edited June 24, 2015 by Delightful

[+Slowswift]

Is it hiring recent college grads right now? If not, then it cannot be "the best" in my book. The best library is the one that gives me a job.

 

Yeah, probably not. I don't actually live in Provo, just close, so I don't really know. Goodness knows if I was a library director I'd hire you! If you're anywhere as near as awesome IRL as you are on here I don't know why they're turning you down.

 

EDIT: Also, Delightful, that stinks. Yeah, no one seems to get the memo... 

Edited June 24, 2015 by Slowswift

[Kaymyth]

Is it hiring recent college grads right now? If not, then it cannot be "the best" in my book. The best library is the one that gives me a job.

 

Cast your net far and wide.  From what I hear from folks in the library world, it's not been easy to get a job in there for several years now.  You may have to be willing to move quite a ways.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Slowswift: Thanks.

Kaymyth: I'm willing to live almost anywhere. One job was in North Dakota and one was in Wyoming. That said....I might have to look at states I never wanted to live in. Namely, Ohio.

Delightful: Argh, that sucks. My parents haven't done that to me as much in recent years, but they've pulled tactics like that before.

[Orlion Blight]

Fun fact:  a spray bottle full of soapy water will take out wasps as effectively as Raid, with an added bonus of no pesticide pollution to the surrounding area.  We used that trick on some paper wasps that had taken up residence in our garden hose housing last year.

 

I'll have to remember that. I don't plan on ever needing it again... the Wasp Wars have been over for some time, now... but one never knows. They return when vigilance is low.

 

Job searching is terrible... almost as terrible as Ohio!

[Kaymyth]

Slowswift: Thanks.

Kaymyth: I'm willing to live almost anywhere. One job was in North Dakota and one was in Wyoming. That said....I might have to look at states I never wanted to live in. Namely, Ohio.

Delightful: Argh, that sucks. My parents haven't done that to me as much in recent years, but they've pulled tactics like that before.

 

Ohio's not that terrible; I have friends who live there.  The winter would take some acclimating, but you'd do just fine.

 

Or, you know, there's Kansas City.  We do have this gem:

 

[Briar King]

Woke myself up cause I was groaning/howling with a super headache. Rushed to get Tylenol fro kitchen and as I was staggering down hall I almost hurled. I managed to make it back in bed and after whimpering for an hr more managed to pass back out for a few hrs. I hate the pain/nausea ones so much. I'd take a 24 hr ache over a 5 min combo gladly.

[Silverblade5]

Cast your net far and wide.  From what I hear from folks in the library world, it's not been easy to get a job in there for several years now.  You may have to be willing to move quite a ways.

The  forum mom has spoken.

[Quiver]

Urgh

 

I don't know why, but for the last few days, I've been thinking. Always a dangerous preoccupation... but what I've been thinking about, specifically, has been... well, a girl I used to know. I had a huge crush on her, for... well, a long time. on and off, it lasted years. And a little while before we lost contact, she said something about liking me at one point as well- at which point we decided to simply drop the whole thing because of my lack of comfort with an internet romance, and her coming out of a relationship.

 

That was a few years ago and... i's kind of struck me that I've never really felt so strongly about anyone the way I did about her. So now I'm considering looking her up and seeing how she's doing...

[Kaymyth]

The  forum mom has spoken.

 

Well, in this case, it's more in my capacity as a person who happens to know several folks with library science degrees.  I think it's not as bad now as it was a few years ago, but it's been a pretty tough job to break into because nobody was wanting to retire for a while there.

 

Urgh

 

I don't know why, but for the last few days, I've been thinking. Always a dangerous preoccupation... but what I've been thinking about, specifically, has been... well, a girl I used to know. I had a huge crush on her, for... well, a long time. on and off, it lasted years. And a little while before we lost contact, she said something about liking me at one point as well- at which point we decided to simply drop the whole thing because of my lack of comfort with an internet romance, and her coming out of a relationship.

 

That was a few years ago and... i's kind of struck me that I've never really felt so strongly about anyone the way I did about her. So now I'm considering looking her up and seeing how she's doing...

 

If it's something you feel strongly about, I'd say go for it.  But these things can go either really, really awesome or just be a sinking letdown. (Hello, personal experience!)  It's a risk, but it's usually worth it.  Even if it's a letdown of, "Oh, she's seeing someone now," at least you can stop wondering.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

My dad was recently called to Denver to interview for a position in Spokane, the city where we lived before we transferred to Arizona. I think I'm the only one who doesn't want to move back to Spokane, and that's largely because I want to strike out on my own for a while. Everyone else is excited about the prospect of reconnecting with old friends and living in a place with trees and four real seasons. 

 

In less than a week, my mom, dad, and sisters are driving up to Spokane and Portland for a family friend's wedding. Because of work, my brother and I are flying up a week later. My parents were planning on using the first few days of their trip to visit Spokane—which excited one of my sisters, who had made plans to visit with one of her friends. 

 

Today, my mom called this sister to her side and told her she wanted to skip Spokane and go straight to Portland. Here are her reasons: 

 

1. We might be moving to Spokane anyway. 
2. If we do go to Spokane, this trip will be a lot of wasted time, because you'll be able to see your friend every day if you want to. 
3. "I'm afraid that if we don't move to Spokane and I see it again, I'm going to die." 

 

In other words, Mom wants to cheat my sister out of what may very well be the last time she'll see her best friend for years because she doesn't want to bear the pain of possibly seeing Spokane and not moving there. 

 

I really, really hope she's changed her mind by the end of today, because that is so wrong I don't even know where to start. 

[Kobold King]

My dad was recently called to Denver to interview for a position in Spokane, the city where we lived before we transferred to Arizona. I think I'm the only one who doesn't want to move back to Spokane, and that's largely because I want to strike out on my own for a while. Everyone else is excited about the prospect of reconnecting with old friends and living in a place with trees and four real seasons. 

 

In less than a week, my mom, dad, and sisters are driving up to Spokane and Portland for a family friend's wedding. Because of work, my brother and I are flying up a week later. My parents were planning on using the first few days of their trip to visit Spokane—which excited one of my sisters, who had made plans to visit with one of her friends. 

 

Today, my mom called this sister to her side and told her she wanted to skip Spokane and go straight to Portland. Here are her reasons: 

 

1. We might be moving to Spokane anyway. 
2. If we do go to Spokane, this trip will be a lot of wasted time, because you'll be able to see your friend every day if you want to. 
3. "I'm afraid that if we don't move to Spokane and I see it again, I'm going to die." 

 

In other words, Mom wants to cheat my sister out of what may very well be the last time she'll see her best friend for years because she doesn't want to bear the pain of possibly seeing Spokane and not moving there. 

 

I really, really hope she's changed her mind by the end of today, because that is so wrong I don't even know where to start.

 

Yeah, "might" isn't a very good argument in this case.

 

Is there any way you could make a detour to Spokane with your sister, in the event of Mother Commitment Failure Syndrome?

[+Slowswift]

Dang.

 

Maybe arrange for you to split off and go see Spokane, while the rest of your family goes to Portland, then meet back up?

 

EDIT: Aaaand ninja'd by Kobold. Of course I was.

Edited June 25, 2015 by Slowswift

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Yeah, "might" isn't a very good argument in this case.

 

Is there any way you could make a detour to Spokane with your sister, in the event of Mother Commitment Failure Syndrome?

Dang.

 

Maybe arrange for you to split off and go see Spokane, while the rest of your family goes to Portland, then meet back up?

 

EDIT: Aaaand ninja'd by Kobold. Of course I was.

 

If I could, I'd do it in a heartbeat. But I won't even be able to make it up there until a week after they leave, and then I'm flying to Portland, staying two days for the wedding, and driving back down with my parents. I'm old enough to rent a car now, so the only real constraint is time—and that's a huge constraint.  

[Kobold King]

If I could, I'd do it in a heartbeat. But I won't even be able to make it up there until a week after they leave, and then I'm flying to Portland, staying two days for the wedding, and driving back down with my parents. I'm old enough to rent a car now, so the only real constraint is time—and that's a huge constraint.

 

That sucks.

 

The only other good option, then, is to try taking it up with your mom. You probably can't rely on her changing her mind if she's reasoned herself into this course of action, so your best bet might be to try guilting/nagging her into returning to the original plan.

 

 

Disclaimer:

 

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

That sucks.

 

The only other good option, then, is to try taking it up with your mom. You probably can't rely on her changing her mind if she's reasoned herself into this course of action, so your best bet might be to try guilting/nagging her into returning to the original plan.

 

 

Disclaimer:

 

 

Oh, man, if guilting or nagging her worked, I'd do that until she changed her mind on everything and let my sister stay in Spokane the entire trip. But when she decides she's right on something, she is right and attempting to change her mind only makes her angry.  

[Elsecaller3414]

I know a lot of people like that.  Once they've decided what they are going to do, they won't change their plans, no matter what.  Sorry about that situation.

[+Slowswift]

Oh, man, if guilting or nagging her worked, I'd do that until she changed her mind on everything and let my sister stay in Spokane the entire trip. But when she decides she's right on something, she is right and attempting to change her mind only makes her angry.

 

At what point will you have acquired enough funds to 1) get the heck out of that house and 2) get your sister a trip to Spokane on your own watch?

[Kobold King]

Oh, man, if guilting or nagging her worked, I'd do that until she changed her mind on everything and let my sister stay in Spokane the entire trip. But when she decides she's right on something, she is right and attempting to change her mind only makes her angry.

 

When was the last time you tried? This sounds really important to your sister, so it just might be worth the risk.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

I know a lot of people like that.  Once they've decided what they are going to do, they won't change their plans, no matter what.  Sorry about that situation.

 

And the worst part is, she's not even thinking about my sister. She's not even pretending. I've had run-ins with her and my dad where they'd make something all about them and package it like they were concerned for me—and I'm not saying that's better or worse than what she's doing now; but I do find it especially frustrating that she isn't even acting like she's concerned about my sister. All she cares about is what she feels and what she wants, and she's acting like that's all that matters.  

At what point will you have acquired enough funds to 1) get the heck out of that house and 2) get your sister a trip to Spokane on your own watch?

 

Once I get a library job that pays a decent starting salary, I'll be able to move out on my own. After that, if she hasn't gotten a trip to Spokane, I'll start saving for one so she can go. 

 

When was the last time you tried? This sounds really important to your sister, so it just might be worth the risk.

 

The last time I tried was….I think a year, year and a half ago, when I confronted her about the way she'd treated me as a teen, and how it made me feel at the time and how it had caused all these issues for me years later. She flew into a rage, denied everything that made her look bad, and claimed everything else was for my own good and that it was okay because it had worked. (Spoiler: It hadn't worked at all. I just got better at hiding things from her.) 

 

I know this isn't for me—it's for my sister, which makes me want to try it even more. But I don't know if it would work. 

[Kobold King]

The last time I tried was….I think a year, year and a half ago, when I confronted her about the way she'd treated me as a teen, and how it made me feel at the time and how it had caused all these issues for me years later. She flew into a rage, denied everything that made her look bad, and claimed everything else was for my own good and that it was okay because it had worked. (Spoiler: It hadn't worked at all. I just got better at hiding things from her.) 

 

I know this isn't for me—it's for my sister, which makes me want to try it even more. But I don't know if it would work. 

 

Yeah, but there might be a difference between accusing her of wrongdoing in her past and sweet-talking her into doing something nice in the present.

 

I don't know her and I don't know your situation, but I think it'd at least be worth a try to talk to her about it, emphasizing not the injustice of the situation but how much it would mean to Abbie.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Yeah, but there might be a difference between accusing her of wrongdoing in her past and sweet-talking her into doing something nice in the present.

 

I don't know her and I don't know your situation, but I think it'd at least be worth a try to talk to her about it, emphasizing not the injustice of the situation but how much it would mean to Abbie.

 

True. I don't know if she'd see the difference, though. She knows how much this means to Abbie, so trying to talk her back into it might be—in her mind—tantamount to accusing her of doing something wrong. I texted Abbie and asked if she's still set on skipping Spokane, because she called her down about twenty minutes ago and I don't know if it was to tell her she'd change her mind or not, but I still haven't gotten a reply. If she says yes, Mom is still set on skipping, I'll try to think of a possible angle to get Abbie this trip. 

[+Slowswift]

It's tripping me out that you all know each other's names. 

 

And Twi, I wish you the best of luck with this! May the Heralds be with you.

Edited June 25, 2015 by Slowswift

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Well, I talked to my sister. She said that Mom and Dad have agreed to send her to Spokane by herself if they don't wind up moving there. 

 

Thing is, Abbie said that apparently they've gone back on their word already about her visiting her friend. Originally, the plan was to let Abbie stay in Portland in a hotel with her friend for a few days, take the friend back to Spokane, and go to the wedding. Then, three weeks after that plan was made, they went back on their word, said Portland wasn't safe, and told her she could have one day with her friend in Spokane. According to Abbie, Dad denied ever having agreed to let her stay in a hotel with her friend in the first place. 

 

So I'm worried that they'll go back on their word about Spokane, too. I told her that if that happens, I'll help her out financially, make part of it a gift so our parents will have less say in whether or not she goes.