The Battle for the Sandwich

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

3 hours ago, Through The Living Ketek said:

*ahem.

It was a Tuesday, the day after the great 2024 Hamburger-Palooza, when Bob's 2, 3, and 4 went missing.
You see, Bob was tired of being the only one holding the spatula. He had commissioned a local mad scientist, Dr. Bob, to create clones to help with the lunch rush. But things went... wrong.

I tell everyone that is all you get for if I told you more it would involve supreme consequences. no one is changing my mind.

I immediately change your mind using strange eldritch powers to compel you to say the rest. 

3 hours ago, Through The Living Grass said:

Oh storms im sorry. 
the bald dragon seems to be suffering from a memory affliction. Someone beyond the comprehension of mortals is curious about what the google doc contains.

Why apologise?

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

Unnamed, who hasn't moved since he first returned to this Thread, opened a door and walked through.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I hire a kandra thief. The kandra gives the Sandwich to me.

Edited March 6 by NerdSandwich

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I get distracted and don't explain the story.

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

I politely ask for the Sandwich.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

1 hour ago, NerdSandwich said:

I hire a kandra thief. The kandra gives the Sandwich to me.

The kandra asks for all of your bones as payment. 

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

LOOK! IT'S SOMETHING EXTREMELY DISTRACTING BEHIND YOU!!!
Steals the Sandwich when it looks away.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

1 hour ago, ThatOneGuyOverThere said:

LOOK! IT'S SOMETHING EXTREMELY DISTRACTING BEHIND YOU!!!
Steals the Sandwich when it looks away.

I drop a hot air balloon on your head and steal the Sandwich while you're distracted 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

5 hours ago, Through the Living Ink said:

I drop a hot air balloon on your head and steal the Sandwich while you're distracted 

I drop a cold air balloon on your head and steal the Sandwich while you're distracted.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

7 hours ago, Unintelligenius said:

I drop a cold air balloon on your head and steal the Sandwich while you're distracted.

I drop a lukewarm air balloon on your head and steal the Sandwich while you're distracted. 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

2 hours ago, Through the Living Ink said:

I drop a lukewarm air balloon on your head and steal the Sandwich while you're distracted. 

Clone drops a zero kelvin balloon on your head and steals the Sandwich while you're distracted.

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

5 hours ago, Through The Living KSauce said:

Clone drops a zero kelvin balloon on your head and steals the Sandwich while you're distracted.

Grabs the Sandwich from your hands as I float up in the hot air balloon previously dropped on my head.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

2 hours ago, ThatOneGuyOverThere said:

Grabs the Sandwich from your hands as I float up in the hot air balloon previously dropped on my head.

I use a flaming arrow to shoot down your hot air balloon and take the Sandwich while you are trying to put out the fire. I then call the cops on you and have you arrested for arson.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

13 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

I use a flaming arrow to shoot down your hot air balloon and take the Sandwich while you are trying to put out the fire. I then call the cops on you and have you arrested for arson.

The flaming hot air balloon falls from the sky to land on top of you. 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

1 minute ago, Through The Living Ash said:

The flaming hot air balloon falls from the sky to land on top of you. 

Luckily, I have a spare shovel in my back pocket. I quickly dig a tunnel down and then away from the flaming hot air balloon. I pop up a couple hundred feet from the burning balloon, Sandwich still in hand.

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

2 hours ago, Unintelligenius said:

I use a flaming arrow to shoot down your hot air balloon and take the Sandwich while you are trying to put out the fire. I then call the cops on you and have you arrested for arson.

I throw the burning gas tanks at the police cars and run, pulling out a vacuum cleaner. I do a flip over you, using the vacuum to suck the Sandwich out of your hands. Sticking the landing, I continue to run off.

Edited March 7 by ThatOneGuyOverThere

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

8 hours ago, ThatOneGuyOverThere said:

I throw the burning gas tanks at the police cars and run, pulling out a vacuum cleaner. I do a flip over you, using the vacuum to suck the Sandwich out of your hands. Sticking the landing, I continue to run off.

Into the sunset. 

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

2 hours ago, Through The Living Ash said:

Into the sunset. 

Which is quite uncomfortable because the sun is a ball of flaming gas. 

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I take the slightly singed sandwich while ash burns alive, and take it to the cult of the stick.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

47 minutes ago, Through The Living Ketek said:

I take the slightly singed sandwich while ash burns alive, and take it to the cult of the stick.

I am apparently now burning alive. Cool. I use my burnyness to burn the cult of the stick and take the sandwich from its charred remains. 

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

After suffering 54-degree burns, it dawns on me that running into the sun might not be a good idea.

Edited March 8 by ThatOneGuyOverThere

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

Just now, ThatOneGuyOverThere said:

After suffering 54-degree burns, it dawned on me that running into the sun might not be a good idea.

Which was weird, because one would think that running into the sunset would make it impossible for anything to dawn. 

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

3 minutes ago, Through The Living Ash said:

Which was weird, because one would think that running into the sunset would make it impossible for anything to dawn. 

Then again, one that was running into the sunset probably wouldn't be thinking.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

Just now, ThatOneGuyOverThere said:

Then again, one that was running into the sunset probably wouldn't be thinking.

They might be thinking, but clearly not very well given their decision. 

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

Driven by my newfound burning desire for the Sandwich, my soul clings to this plane of existence and searches for a method to reclaim it, disappearing from here.

Edited March 9 by ThatOneGuyOverThere