Depression, for someone who prides himself on keeping an open mind, it sure did take a lot of persuasion before I agreed I needed help. Still kinda cavalier about it, after all this time tbh, so probably not the best person to ask for help. My sister used to have anxiety attacks, got checked then I realized slippery slope of awkwardness and denial that is mental health.
I'll advise you to take advantage of this topic and admit that you do have a problem, it's immensely helpful in reminding yourself that there's something that you need to take care of.