The Battle for the Sandwich

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

13 hours ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

I threaten to destroy all the planets you care about if you don't give me the sandwich

I know how to do that . Thank you, Dark Forest.

With an army of sophons, I begin unfolding the layers of reality to begin the process of destroying all Investiture. I also leave Roshar for Scadrial and hold Roshar in a state of Dark Forest Deterrence

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

Well, I eat the Dark Forest deference, and claim the Sandwich from whoever has it now idk anymore

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 minute ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Well, I eat the Dark Forest deference, and claim the Sandwich from whoever has it now idk anymore

I had backups. I threaten to use it to cast a spell (metaphorical, if you get the reference, you get it) to destroy Roshar, where I left behind many of your organs.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I wait until you choose someone with a low degree of deterrence as Swordholder and then systemically dismantle your defenses, taking the sandwich in the process.

[___ He/Him]

I appear, look around at the chaos, and disappear

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

10 hours ago, NerdyAarakocra said:

I wait until you choose someone with a low degree of deterrence as Swordholder and then systemically dismantle your defenses, taking the sandwich in the process.

But I was Swordholder the whole time and had a deterrence of 101%. And my successor is Sandy who has a degree of deterrence of 102%.

 

I'm still reading Death's End.

Spoiler

The Ring expedition has concluded. Also they're trying to find a way to show goodwill to the universe. 

Trisolaris got obliterated.

 

Edited July 7, 2025 by KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I attempt to steal it. I fail, but how do you know that I didn't actually create a decoy sandwich and eat the real one?

JK

I do reconnaissance, see the Swordholder's deterrance and go throw up down the toilet.

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

1 minute ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

I attempt to steal it. I fail, but how do you know that I didn't actually create a decoy sandwich and eat the real one?

JK

I do reconnaissance, see the Swordholder's deterrance and go throw up down the toilet.

U didn’t know this, but u have to bold it or it doesn’t count

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

1 hour ago, ChipsAHoid said:

U didn’t know this, but u have to bold it or it doesn’t count

I wonder why the world 'bold' just appeared out of thin air without context. Strange.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

On 7/7/2025 at 9:07 AM, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

But I was Swordholder the whole time and had a deterrence of 101%. And my successor is Sandy who has a degree of deterrence of 102%.

 

I'm still reading Death's End.

  Reveal hidden contents

The Ring expedition has concluded. Also they're trying to find a way to show goodwill to the universe. 

Trisolaris got obliterated.

 

For additional context, this is not ultimate deterrence. If I send the signal, only Roshar gets obliterated. Scadrial and everywhere else remains.

17 hours ago, YouCantHaveMySandwich said:

I attempt to steal it. I fail, but how do you know that I didn't actually create a decoy sandwich and eat the real one?

JK

I do reconnaissance, see the Swordholder's deterrance and go throw up down the toilet.

I give you 49 hours to bring me the sandwhich before I blow up whatever your homeworld is.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

12 hours ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

For additional context, this is not ultimate deterrence. If I send the signal, only Roshar gets obliterated. Scadrial and everywhere else remains.

I give you 49 hours to bring me the sandwhich before I blow up whatever your homeworld is.

I fire a

Getting to the point where all of this is Death's End /The Dark Forest spoilery, so I'm just going to hide everything. If you haven't read the Remembrance of Earth's Past series (that being The Three-Body Problem, The Dark Forest, and Death's End), consider this your unsolicited book recommendation of the hour.

Spoiler

Two-Vector Foil at your home system and adapt my species such that they can live in two dimensions.

 

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

Bartholomew, who had been contemplating his evil master plans and definitely not napping, covers Nerdy's homeworld in Oobleck so as to make it blow-up-proof. 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 hour ago, NerdyAarakocra said:

I fire a

Getting to the point where all of this is Death's End /The Dark Forest spoilery, so I'm just going to hide everything. If you haven't read the Remembrance of Earth's Past series (that being The Three-Body Problem, The Dark Forest, and Death's End), consider this your unsolicited book recommendation of the hour.

  Reveal hidden contents

Two-Vector Foil at your home system and adapt my species such that they can live in two dimensions.

 

Where in Death's End though?

Spoiler

They got the 3 plans right now. The Bunker, the Black Domain and Lightspeed ships.

Also the false alarm thing happened.

 

1 hour ago, Ashkaloda said:

Bartholomew, who had been contemplating his evil master plans and definitely not napping, covers Nerdy's homeworld in Oobleck so as to make it blow-up-proof. 

Actually, it would most likely involve blowing up the star, and because Roshar's star is more massive than the Sun (how else would a year be 500 days), the resulting mini-supernova would probably destroy everything up to Braize. The Oobleck would be instantly vapourised.

Edited July 8, 2025 by KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

The Demon King of Salvation uses the collected probability of Kim Dokja's company to manipulate the stories into saying that The Sandwich is within their company. They pay the sandwich above a living wage.

This is your ORV recomendation. PM me and click the link in my description.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

28 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

Where in Death's End though?

  Reveal hidden contents

They got the 3 plans right now. The Bunker, the Black Domain and Lightspeed ships.

Also the false alarm thing happened.

 

Actually, it would most likely involve blowing up the star, and because Roshar's star is more massive than the Sun (how else would a year be 500 days), the resulting mini-supernova would probably destroy everything up to Braize. The Oobleck would be instantly vapourised.

Not super great in orbital mechanics but I can think of some ways. 

The Oobleck, contrary, would not be vaporised as the whole point of it was being blow-up-proof. 

4 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

The Demon King of Salvation uses the collected probability of Kim Dokja's company to manipulate the stories into saying that The Sandwich is within their company. They pay the sandwich above a living wage.

This is your ORV recomendation. PM me and click the link in my description.

They are sued as the sandwich is not a living being. 

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

Just now, Ashkaloda said:

Not super great in orbital mechanics but I can think of some ways. 

The Oobleck, contrary, would not be vaporised as the whole point of it was being blow-up-proof. 

They are sued as the sandwich is not a living being. 

Kim Dokja's Company uses the authority of the star stream to erase the sue complaint, as the only laws they are subject too are their own.

A Probability storm starts to apear in front of you for going against the Nebula of The Oldest Dream. He is very angry.

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

1 minute ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Kim Dokja's Company uses the authority of the star stream to erase the sue complaint, as the only laws they are subject too are their own.

A Probability storm starts to apear in front of you for going against the Nebula of The Oldest Dream. He is very angry.

Uh oh lol

I create an unmade Sandwich

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

4 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Kim Dokja's Company uses the authority of the star stream to erase the sue complaint, as the only laws they are subject too are their own.

A Probability storm starts to apear in front of you for going against the Nebula of The Oldest Dream. He is very angry.

This makes the fish with legs who sued them very sad, and so they go to therapy. 

 

Still very far from everything else and not understanding the references, I offer the Probability storm a freshly filleted fish. 

4 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Uh oh lol

I create an unmade Sandwich

A fish with legs appears in front of the Unmade Sandwich and consumes it. 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

12 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

The Demon King of Salvation uses the collected probability of Kim Dokja's company to manipulate the stories into saying that The Sandwich is within their company. They pay the sandwich above a living wage.

This is your ORV recomendation. PM me and click the link in my description.

You are on Roshar.

The Sandwhich is on Scadrial.

Any attempt to take it and I broadcast Roshar's coordinates to the galaxy, and then it won't take long before a Dark Forest Strike obliterates you.

7 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

Not super great in orbital mechanics but I can think of some ways. 

The Oobleck, contrary, would not be vaporised as the whole point of it was being blow-up-proof. 

They are sued as the sandwich is not a living being. 

But the plasma from the stellar explosion would significantly slow down Roshar's velocity and it would crash into the remnant of it's star.

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

1 minute ago, Ashkaloda said:

This makes the fish with legs who sued them very sad, and so they go to therapy. 

 

Still very far from everything else and not understanding the references, I offer the Probability storm a freshly filleted fish. 

A fish with legs appears in front of the Unmade Sandwich and consumes it. 

Did you sacrifice one of ur fish???? That’s so dark

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

2 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

This makes the fish with legs who sued them very sad, and so they go to therapy. 

 

Still very far from everything else and not understanding the references, I offer the Probability storm a freshly filleted fish. 

A fish with legs appears in front of the Unmade Sandwich and consumes it. 

The Probability Storm is not sentient and attacks you with lightning damage. You must gain help from the Constellations or feel the wrath of lightning.

1 minute ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

You are on Roshar.

The Sandwhich is on Scadrial.

Any attempt to take it and I broadcast Roshar's coordinates to the galaxy, and then it won't take long before a Dark Forest Strike obliterates you.

But the plasma from the stellar explosion would significantly slow down Roshar's velocity and it would crash into the remnant of it's star.

Im not on roshar

Im in the Star Stream

The Demon King of Salvation does not care because he does not know what Roshar is. He had used Story Manipulation to get the sandwich, and now has the Sandwich because of the innate rules of the star stream.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

3 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

You are on Roshar.

The Sandwhich is on Scadrial.

Any attempt to take it and I broadcast Roshar's coordinates to the galaxy, and then it won't take long before a Dark Forest Strike obliterates you.

But the plasma from the stellar explosion would significantly slow down Roshar's velocity and it would crash into the remnant of it's star.

Sure, eventually. But, presumably, this is not Roshar? I somehow lost the conversation in the past few minutes. 

2 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Did you sacrifice one of ur fish???? That’s so dark

What? I would never! 

1 minute ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

The Probability Storm is not sentient and attacks you with lightning damage. You must gain help from the Constellations or feel the wrath of lightning.

Im not on roshar

Im in the Star Stream

The Demon King of Salvation does not care because he does not know what Roshar is. He had used Story Manipulation to get the sandwich, and now has the Sandwich because of the innate rules of the star stream.

Not knowing who or what a Constellation is, I opt to feel the wrath of the lightning. I stubbornly communicate this to the Probability Storm, ignoring its lack of sentience. 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

17 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

The Probability Storm is not sentient and attacks you with lightning damage. You must gain help from the Constellations or feel the wrath of lightning.

Im not on roshar

Im in the Star Stream

The Demon King of Salvation does not care because he does not know what Roshar is. He had used Story Manipulation to get the sandwich, and now has the Sandwich because of the innate rules of the star stream.

I threaten to broadcast the location of the Star Stream unless you return the Sandwich.

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

20 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

Sure, eventually. But, presumably, this is not Roshar? I somehow lost the conversation in the past few minutes. 

What? I would never! 

Not knowing who or what a Constellation is, I opt to feel the wrath of the lightning. I stubbornly communicate this to the Probability Storm, ignoring its lack of sentience. 

The lightning strikes you down. You get Lightning damage

I would assume this would kill a fish, but you know.

6 minutes ago, KaladinsSenseOfHumorSpren said:

I threaten to broadcast the location of the Star Stream unless you return the Sandwich.

You dont know where the star stream is. And in the star stream, The Oldest Dream has complete Omniscience. The Oldest Dream is a member of Kim Dokja's Company.

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

2 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

The lightning strikes you down. You get Lightning damage

I would assume this would kill a fish, but you know.

You dont know where the star stream is. And in the star stream, The Oldest Dream has complete Omniscience. The Oldest Dream is a member of Kim Dokja's Company.

coder! U spoiled smth!