InfiniteInsanity

I did it!

I’m done!

I am no longer a junior!

And I get to torture all my friends with that fact!

Its great!

So I get to go to FSY again this year.

Except this time I’ll be in Utah. And I’ll actually have to meet new people.

And I’m excited but also absolutely terrified.

People are scary.

Y'all my brain is on a roll. 

It's just going.

Like I'm just scrolling through the Shard. Happily letting my brain drift from thing to thing.

Like and was thinking about short jokes. And tall people.

And then washing machines. And shrinking people.

And now I want to make some sort of blueprints.

Along with an essay as to why my brain's logic is right.

And the thing is I don't have free time right now.

I should be working on a final.

My brain and emotions are numb.

So I don't want to sleep.

Because these are the times I often have dreams.

And for the past few years dreams I've had are nightmares.

Which often include wide spread death.

And I don't want death right now.

I get to go tour schools for show choir!!!

Starting with a middle school.... with historically mean children.... yay?

Also I think the weather won't scare me too much as long as it doesn't hit while I'm at the middle school or driving around.

Happy Birthday!

So... remember how I was doing some choreography?
Maybe you don't that's fine.

Well now its tech week.

And we put it with the band for the first time yesterday.

Turns out the band has 7 extra measures.

That I had to come up with choreo for. 

And I think I've got most of it. 

However what in the world am I supposed to do with the measure where the band just doesn't play anything??

There's literally nothing happening for that measure. 

And I don't want them to just stand there.

I don't want to just stand there. I have to dance this too.

If anyone has any ideas please give. Cause that's all I got left.

Y'all want to know what was sooo much fun today. 

Walking to eighth period only to hear tornado sirens...

And then being stuck in a locker room with boys who were dead set on being as chaotic as possible... for an hour.

Though I was given much more information than I normally would have because eighth period is my show choir period. And as is quickly discovered, show choir children are insane. So many people were keeping very close track of the storm and tornados. One dude was even sad because when they let us go only to immediately tell us to go back he almost got outside and was close to seeing the tornados. He looked like he was near tears. I don't think he actually was but it looked that way.

Yup.

Lovely fun.

Tornados and big windy storms are the worst part of being a Nebraskan. 

Happy Birthday!!!!

Dancing is a word right?

Autocorrect is trying to tell me it isn't...

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!

My shoes for prom came today. Prom is in a week.

They make me like 3-4 inches taller which makes me feel really tall right now.

However my there will still be a decent gap in height between my date and I.

I'm just gonna be giggling all through prom because he's still taller and yet I'll feel so tall.

It's gonna be awesome.

I have cried twice today.

And it felt really good.

But also I think I'll cry more before the day is through.

Also by the way, I have used one of my poems in competition for slam poetry.

We're going to the semifinals sometime next week.

And there are videos somewhere that will be posted eventually on Youtube I think which is kind of cool. There are also pictures of me somewhere.

Yup.

I get to choreograph things for a show!

I'm really excited but also terrified. 

I'm doing it with someone else but they've been sick and we have to start teaching it on Monday.

It'll work out. The student directors are obligated and all qualified to help so it'll be fine.

Hey y'all. I've discovered that I have a problem.

I do not try in my harder classes... because I can get away with lower grades.

However I do try in all my easy classes... because I can't get away with it...

My grades are actually pretty good right now but... you know. 

Its a problem because I get stressed because I don't do the work.

HI.

I'm gonna post something kind of similar to Kajsa's SU.

Also gonna be about show choir.

And the same competition.

But we go to different schools so... yeah.

First of all I saw @Kajsa's show. And she's talked it down a lot for this week. It was INCREDIBLE. If that was their vocals at like half power as she says then... Hearing them at full voice would be insane. They were awesome.

I got to watch other groups.

And then I had a panic attack and then I performed and it went pretty well. And then critique and the judge was our choreographer's wife and she was super sweet and made us all cry (in a good way).

We placed first in daytime. Which was incredible. It felt good to know that even our "bad" performances can be considered good. 

Then finals. Which was fun but also we performed at 10pm. And I pushed myself to the limit. So much so that I kind of died at the very end. But I wasn't the only one. Then I was still dying and I watched the host group. And then awards and we were the grand champs. Which was insane.

I still think that the varsity group from Kajsa's school should have won. They were amazing and I love them. I owe being in show choir to someone in that group.

I'm still drained. And I'm also sick.

"My mom and dad are both on the purple team, so I'm on the purple team. Even though I'm blue. It's confusing." -Bluey

Happy Birthday!!

@Kajsa.

....we beat the chicken little show....

We won and we beat the chicken little show.I

They hadn't lost until yesterday.

That felt so so good.

Yesterday was a roller coaster.

In the morning I listened watched the guys play a 2 HOUR game of poker. Like... They all stayed in as long as they could. It was really funny. They were very loud.

I missed the costume change during daytime because my dress for stuck and I couldn't get it off. And then my knees died.

So I ate dinner (which was actually good and I should probably do that more at comps) took painkillers. Which helped but the adrenaline was actually what killed the pain.

We then did finals which was so fun and felt so good. We've actually started saying a prayer in my side of the stage right before we go on and it is so comforting and really nice and the thing is that everyone is there it not just a few people it's everyone. Its very nice.

And then yeah. We WON!!! 

We beat chicken little and another really good group and got best vocals. We have now won that comp 3 years in a row. Its very nice. 

And I'll be in the same place as Kajsa's school next week and I am so excited!!

I did not get enough sleep. But you know what I did do? Finish a book in less the 24 hours.

I did it on Friday too.

Both books were the first in their series.

Both books were by the same author.

Both books ended in more of an "Oh look! You're not dead!" "Oh hey! You aren't dead either that's great because there were people and things that wanted and kind of still want to kill us!" sort of a way rather than "We did it! It's over!" sort of a way. Which makes sense cause they are the first books in their separate series.

Anyways I have a plan now.

I have three library books left. 

All of them are shorter than the one I read yesterday.

I shall read them all fast.... and then I'll read Yumi. Finally.

How is y'alls?

We won on Saturday.

It was chaotic and lovely and fun.

I got a crocheted chicken. It's really cute.

It was my emotional support chicken all day and now my little brother has taken it so I need to make more things like it. Obviously. 

I had a panic attack in the morning cause I felt lonely and I had no one to hang around.

My parents were there and I spent pretty much all of the time that they were there with them. It was really nice.

This little thing has nothing to do with show choir  and isn't happy either please just ignore it if you don't want to deal with anything like that.

Hi everyone!

I've got show choir things today.

The cursed competition.

It's just cursed. 

Something always happens. 

The risers are strapped tight enough and they split open and swallow someones leg for a bit. Someone else does something and gets really hurt and the whole comp is on pause for half and hour or more. They say the wrong name during the varsity group's introduction. And then there's an interruption to fix their name (that actually happened twice last year). I've had to save one of my guy friends from some females last year. They didn't actually do anything but he was uncomfortable and was scared to leave on his own so I came and got him out of there. 

So yeah. Cursed.

But all that aside I went to slam poetry yesterday and I wrote a happy poem and they gave me some ideas to make it better which was nice.

We had a temple trip last night that was nice.

And... yeah. I guess I might post more today if I have time (I've got homework to do so I'll be busy)

Y'all are amazing. I'll do my best not to die or literally break a leg today. Who knows? Maybe the curse will be nice to us.

Now is the time for registering for classes for next year! Which is when I'll be a senior... 

I have plenty of space in the one year schedule to get all the credits I need to graduate. I could probably have everything ready so I could graduate at the end of winter semester if I really wanted to (I don't). 

However like none of my friends seem to and I'm really confused. I have taken most of the time to do things besides core classes with music classes since my freshman year. And yet somehow even though they've done less of those then me, my friends are struggling. 

Like I just did course request stuff for next year and I put the last classes I need to graduate and all my music classes in and I still had plenty of space to put in other things if I wanted to (which I did for now because while less school would be nice I get bored to easily and I want to be sure I qualify for honor roll both semesters.) But they didn't?

Maybe it has something to do with me taking 2 years of math in middle school? But like I didn't stop doing math until this year, this semester so... I don't know. 

I'm just lost. 

It's a good thing for me! I've done no summer school. I won't need any summer school.

It's just weird and confusing and I don't understand it.