Mental health club!

[Usseewa]

Just now, NerdSandwich said:

I have scars physically, mentally, and emotionally.
I don't view my scars as 'cool' certainly, I view them as part of me. I made some of them happen and I regret doing it, but I couldn't really help myself.
I was a cruel, hopeless, depressed, dumb, manipulative, arrogant, lazy, selfish, insecure, angry, stubborn.

Well I could go on

I think that's ur self-hate talkin' (all the negative descriptors)

 

sometimes i try to ignore my cuts and just be blissful

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Probably.
Anyway, I like talk to nobody about it which probably doesn't help.
Although my dad seems like he suspects something sometimes

And there's Chips.
But I tryyyy not to bother him

He apparently visited the Shard an hour ago and posted nothing?
Testament to his business

Edited May 12 by NerdSandwich

[Usseewa]

1 minute ago, NerdSandwich said:

Probably.
Anyway, I like talk to nobody about it which probably doesn't help.
Although my dad seems like he suspects something sometimes

And there's Chips.
But I tryyyy not to bother him

Oh, he doesn't know?

 

Well, I'll say it's important to have someone to talk to. A close friend, a family member, therapist, etc.

 

*she says hypocritically*

but no fr

[NerdSandwich she/her]

No he knows which is kinda creepy cause I feel like he has leverage over me somehow.

@ChipsAHoid?
Naw he has a million friends, a million homeworks (yes yes I don't bother with grammar I'm working on engineering), a million band things

I'm certainly not bothering him.

But I know literally nobody else who cares abt me (who isn't family) irl

So can't really do that

[Usseewa]

5 minutes ago, NerdSandwich said:

He apparently visited the Shard an hour ago and posted nothing?
Testament to his business

I thought u meant ur dad  

Just now, NerdSandwich said:

No he knows which is kinda creepy cause I feel like he has leverage over me somehow.

@ChipsAHoid?
Naw he has a million friends, a million homeworks (yes yes I don't bother with grammar I'm working on engineering), a million band things

I'm certainly not bothering him.

But I know literally nobody else who cares abt me (who isn't family) irl

So can't really do that

Hmmmmmm.........

 

Anyway,

It's okay to bother him for something like this.

 

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I'm gonna disagree with you on that one

For his own good lol

I'd probably steal his liver again.

[Usseewa]

whelp i gotta go study

have fun eating your friend's liver

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Oh not a chance.
Aforementioned homework
Imagine studying.
*coughs* I might be a lazy nerd

[Usseewa]

Just now, NerdSandwich said:

Oh not a chance.
Aforementioned homework
Imagine studying.
*coughs* I might be a lazy nerd

i literally half to if i want to live

pretty much

not really, but it feels like that sometimes

 

i struggle with procrastination lol

do u?

it's not the same as laziness

 

well not always I guess

[Verdance he/him]

Just now, Usseewa said:

i literally half to if i want to live

pretty much

not really, but it feels like that sometimes

 

i struggle with procrastination lol

do u?

it's not the same as laziness

 

well not always I guess

I struggle with procrastination as well

one of the main reasons i have depression actually 

[Usseewa]

11 minutes ago, Verdance said:

I struggle with procrastination as well

one of the main reasons i have depression actually 

DEPRESSSION IS SO WONDERFULLLLELLEKEKDJDJDJDJDNNENWNWNWNANSSSNSNSNSNJWJWJWJEME

I'M GONNA GO DO SOMETHING PROACTIVE CALLED STUDDDDDDEPRESSIONYING

HAHHWHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHH

that's basically what my notes look like, except with more typos and not really any allcaps because it's too tiring

 

edit: what the ado, i forgor i posted this

Edited May 12 by Usseewa

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

1 hour ago, NerdSandwich said:

Probably.
Anyway, I like talk to nobody about it which probably doesn't help.
Although my dad seems like he suspects something sometimes

And there's Chips.
But I tryyyy not to bother him

He apparently visited the Shard an hour ago and posted nothing?
Testament to his business

I said stuff in pms

 just busy is all

And you never listen when I say it’s really not bothering me

1 hour ago, Usseewa said:

Well, I'll say it's important to have someone to talk to. A close friend, a family member, therapist, etc.

Like I’ve been saying?

1 hour ago, NerdSandwich said:

No he knows which is kinda creepy cause I feel like he has leverage over me somehow.

@ChipsAHoid?
Naw he has a million friends, a million homeworks (yes yes I don't bother with grammar I'm working on engineering), a million band things

I'm certainly not bothering him.

But I know literally nobody else who cares abt me (who isn't family) irl

So can't really do that

Define a million friends

I’m really not that popular

1 hour ago, Usseewa said:

I thought u meant ur dad  

Hmmmmmm.........

 

Anyway,

It's okay to bother him for something like this.

 

Yes

yes it is

1 hour ago, NerdSandwich said:

I'm gonna disagree with you on that one

For his own good lol

I'd probably steal his liver again.

1 hour ago, NerdSandwich said:

Oh not a chance.
Aforementioned homework
Imagine studying.
*coughs* I might be a lazy nerd

Hey I wasn’t doing homework for once

I was practicing my band music

 Aaaand figuring out how to medley  Little Do You Know, Baby Shark, Für Elise, Flight of he Bumblebee, River Flows In You, and Rush E into one song

And it works too

I still can't play it all right but the fact it can be done is what's terrifying

I was being productive trust

[Myst He/Him]

So….

As a few of you know, I have a girlfriend now, but like, I keep catastrophizing about messing up cause like, I care about her and us and idk, but like, it’s a problem because it means I’m stressing over anything I think I’m doing wrong(even after she’s told me multiple times that it’s alright) 

Anything on how to manage this? I’m generally good with anxiety, and when I’m not, I can fake it till I make it. But this is different somehow and I was wondering if anyone had advice

[Verdance he/him]

1 minute ago, Myst said:

So….

As a few of you know, I have a girlfriend now, but like, I keep catastrophizing about messing up cause like, I care about her and us and idk, but like, it’s a problem because it means I’m stressing over anything I think I’m doing wrong(even after she’s told me multiple times that it’s alright) 

Anything on how to manage this? I’m generally good with anxiety, and when I’m not, I can fake it till I make it. But this is different somehow and I was wondering if anyone had advice

Erm

i specialize in depression, sorry…

….You haven’t broken up yet?
…wow that sound stupid

[Myst He/Him]

3 minutes ago, Verdance said:

Erm

i specialize in depression, sorry…

….You haven’t broken up yet?
…wow that sound stupid

Fair

I mean, no, it’s not something she’s causing, she’s really understanding and willing to put up with me(part of why I like her)

And don’t worry

Edit; or like are you saying that like since we haven’t broken up it’s not?

Edited May 12 by Myst

[#1 Taln Fan he/him]

8 minutes ago, Myst said:

So….

As a few of you know, I have a girlfriend now, but like, I keep catastrophizing about messing up cause like, I care about her and us and idk, but like, it’s a problem because it means I’m stressing over anything I think I’m doing wrong(even after she’s told me multiple times that it’s alright) 

Anything on how to manage this? I’m generally good with anxiety, and when I’m not, I can fake it till I make it. But this is different somehow and I was wondering if anyone had advice

It’s something that’ll somewhat ease with time, but it’s kind of a natural part of the process of a romantic relationship. I’d say to just try to regulate those emotions and to share them with her/communicate (and that it’s not the fault of something she’s doing, if that’s the case). It shows you care, and it’s likely she feels some of the same 

[Myst He/Him]

6 minutes ago, #1 Taln Fan said:

It’s something that’ll somewhat ease with time, but it’s kind of a natural part of the process of a romantic relationship. I’d say to just try to regulate those emotions and to share them with her/communicate (and that it’s not the fault of something she’s doing, if that’s the case). It shows you care, and it’s likely she feels some of the same 

Alright thanks, I think I understand.

This reminds me of the first time the two of us held hands. I had to focus so much on making sure I wasn’t shaking(I didn’t do well at that) and I could feel her doing the same

Edited May 12 by Myst

[NerdSandwich she/her]

On 5/11/2026 at 10:47 PM, ChipsAHoid said:

I said stuff in pms

 just busy is all

And you never listen when I say it’s really not bothering me

Like I’ve been saying?

Define a million friends

I’m really not that popular

Yes

yes it is

Hey I wasn’t doing homework for once

I was practicing my band music

 Aaaand figuring out how to medley  Little Do You Know, Baby Shark, Für Elise, Flight of he Bumblebee, River Flows In You, and Rush E into one song

And it works too

I still can't play it all right but the fact it can be done is what's terrifying

I was being productive trust

Oh crud I summoned him didn't I 

Ok correction:

*holds up clarifying finger*

I'm not bothering you, you simply don't have that kinda time.

A million more friends than me at least lol.

CHIPS!!!

(this is where I would yell the full legal name (I love having that kinda privilege)

YOU AREN'T DOING HOMEWORK???!!!
YOU AREN'T WATCHING 7 HOUR VIDEOS FROM YOUR MATH TEACHER???!!!!!

Now that makes me not depressed
*happiness*

*steals liver*

...Well that is a very unique medley sounds fun
Now just add Bach, "Never Gonna Give You Up" (disruptive tonal shift), an aggressive commercial theme and you've got it!

Yeah consider me terrified

Although those are some good songs

Edited May 13 by NerdSandwich

[Keke They/he]

@Usseewa

*hugs*

i read up on the posts and i dont have a lot of advice. 

What i do have is this. Some ways to help stop sh is like, hide your knifes, like give them to a trusted friend or put them somewhere youll forget, when i struggled i put them behind a bunch of towels in the top of a closet. 

If you have urges try to distract yourself, talk to someone, watch a show, play a game and occupy your hands. Writing is a good way to do that. 

Another thing is after, if you do relapse i suggest having bandaids in your room so you can put them on without others knowing and then wear long sleeves. *hugs*

also just talking to people abt it helps so they can help you. 

Anyways we love you usseewa!!

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Yeah well said Usseewa

[Verdance he/him]

@Keke thank you for making me think about this topic.

I haven’t thought about it much, but i used to have like one of three pocketknives basically at my fingertips wherever i went up until I SH’d. Whenever i would be emotionally upset i would feel the knife in my pocket and sometimes would think about it, but quickly shoot it down. Until… I didn’t. After i SH’d I gave my knives to my parents. Idk if I would have stayed clean if my parents didn’t have them, i do have a penknife and scissors nearby but noticeably i have been thinking a lot less about cutting since the pocketknives have been out of reach. 
@Usseewa
I highly recommend you gather up anything you might cut yourself with and give them to your parents, or a friend, or a trusted loved one. This is about the last piece of advice i can give you on this, to be honest. If you can’t bring yourself to do this, or if it doesn’t help, then there’s nothing i can really do or say than just we will always be your friends, we will always care for you, and that you matter so much more than you think.

[Usseewa]

Hey guys..

thanks for the support and stuff

i logged on because I was pretty happy all day, but then started thinking about tough stuff that I can't really talk to anyone about, maybe my therapist idk. But I've been thinking abt it and stuff and now I'm just really overwhelmed and.. distraught, I guess is a good word. And I was thinking of self-harming again (I haven't done it today, and when I was happy earlier I thought to myself it would be good to try and not do it today and work from there or something). So I decided to take advice everyoen says and talk abt it with someone instead? The "someone" being the shard.. heh.

I can't really give my implements/"sharps" to anyone. I can probably put in a different place. The one now is too convenient.

sigh.

I keep getting like this every few days and I just spiral and feel stuck and lost and no one to talk to about it.

 

edit: i'll check back here later..

Edited May 12 by Usseewa

[NerdSandwich she/her]

*hugs*
Agh I wish I could do smth

*hugs*

[#1 Taln Fan he/him]

40 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

I can't really give my implements/"sharps" to anyone. I can probably put in a different place. The one now is too convenient

Is there a specific reason why not? (If you’re willing to share)

or is it just not wanting to tell parents and have that convo? (Which is very fair)

[Usseewa]

11 minutes ago, #1 Taln Fan said:

Is there a specific reason why not? (If you’re willing to share)

or is it just not wanting to tell parents and have that convo? (Which is very fair)

I can't

Then the person I give it to would know.

 

edit

also I've been trusting people less and I'm paranoid about certain things...

Edited May 12 by Usseewa