Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[+Hoiditthroughthegrapevine he/him]

1 hour ago, I am Witless said:

I wish that I will survive my Humanities 101 class this semester without too much mental trauma or lost sleep. 

The Nightwatcher grants your boon, you get great sleep this semester, unfortunately you sleep through most of your humanities 101 class as well. You also survive your humanities class without too much mental trauma, but this implies that you will have a little mental trauma. The Nightwatcher, being the jerky spren of poetic justice that she is, makes your small mental trauma a very specific condition. You now have a case of Tourettes syndrome which is only triggered when you recite poetry.

I wish I could play chess with Robert Jordan and smoke some Two Rivers tabac from a hand carved pipe that looks like the smoke is coming from a Dragon's jaws.

Edited January 10, 2018 by hoiditthroughthegrapevine

[Lelouch Vi Britannia]

17 hours ago, Meandering Monotreme said:

Granted, but every other foreign language in a star wars film sounds to you that they are shouting "Houdini" all the time.

I wish that I could look through any other person's eyes at will.

"Houtini" means look over here. I'm not sure why I know this.

[ShardplateJoe III]

On ‎1‎/‎10‎/‎2018 at 2:59 PM, hoiditthroughthegrapevine said:

I wish I could play chess with Robert Jordan and smoke some Two Rivers tabac from a hand carved pipe that looks like the smoke is coming from a Dragon's jaws.

Granted, you are brought into the CR to play a game of chess with Mr. Jordan's cognitive shadow, and are free to come and go as you please, and Jordan will be there waiting for a new game whenever you return-- Mr. Jordan has got some time-- and the Nightwatcher makes a pipe of your description. As an added bonus, it is a fabrial pipe. Place any material of your choice in the pipe, and after 10 seconds, it will automatically be soulcast into the tabac you so desire. Your bane is that you now have a condition that constantly gives you ingrown toenails. No medical procedure, no treatment of any kind will fix this. You will be perpetually in pain when you walk, and will have to constantly fight the infection that threatens your toes.

I wish for all ten surges, with a means of fueling them as renewable as stormlight, and that my bane will not directly inhibit my ability to use the surges except tangentially.

Edited January 13, 2018 by TheTigerKandra

[FallenRadiant]

19 hours ago, TheTigerKandra said:

Granted, you are brought into the CR to play a game of chess with Mr. Jordan's cognitive shadow, and are free to come and go as you please, and Jordan will be there waiting for a new game whenever you return-- Mr. Jordan has got some time-- and the Nightwatcher makes a pipe of your description. As an added bonus, it is a fabrial pipe. Place any material of your choice in the pipe, and after 10 seconds, it will automatically be soulcast into the tabac you so desire. Your bane is that you now have a condition that constantly gives you ingrown toenails. No medical procedure, no treatment of any kind will fix this. You will be perpetually in pain when you walk, and will have to constantly fight the infection that threatens your toes.

I wish for all ten surges, with a means of fueling them as renewable as stormlight, and that my bane will not directly inhibit my ability to use the surges except tangentially.

Granted, but your stormlight only recharges on the 29th of February and there is no such thing as spheres that you can use to store your stormlight for later use.

 

I wish for 6 months of paid vacation.

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

5 hours ago, FallenRadiant said:

Granted, but your stormlight only recharges on the 29th of February and there is no such thing as spheres that you can use to store your stormlight for later use.

 

I wish for 6 months of paid vacation.

Granted, but you must be the one who pays (both your paycheck, and for your vacation).

I want to be a FULLBORN.

[The Young Pyromancer he/him]

Granted. However, you can't compound or store/burn anything beyond the base metals. So no Bendalloy God metals, ect. Also, you are crippled and stuck in a wheelchair, which no amount of gold can fix.

I wish to be so irresistibly attractive that everyone who sees me must obey my every command.

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

41 minutes ago, TheYoungPyromancer said:

Granted. However, you can't compound or store/burn anything beyond the base metals. So no Bendalloy God metals, ect. Also, you are crippled and stuck in a wheelchair, which no amount of gold can fix.

I wish to be so irresistibly attractive that everyone who sees me must obey my every command.

Granted, However suddenly can only talk in Lopen quotes.

I want To bond a highspren 

[Guest]

You do indeed bond to a highspren. Unfortunately, you can't quite see the top of it (I mean, it is called a highspren for a reason, right?) and subsequently are never actually able to communicate with it (I'd assume its face is at the top of its head) nor fully utilize your power.

I wish I could live a nice quiet life in the desert somewhere.

[+Hoiditthroughthegrapevine he/him]

2 hours ago, theRoyalDingus said:

I wish I could live a nice quiet life in the desert somewhere.

Granted, you are instantly transported to the middle of the Saharan desert. Hope you had a bottle of water in your pocket when you made that wish...
It's nice and quiet being far away from civilization, but if you don't feel like cooking delivery's not an option, here's a google map view of the closest restaurants:

I wish that every time you had to use the constant to figure out a math problem, that you would get a slice of real pie to eat while you are figuring out that math problem...

 

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

1 hour ago, hoiditthroughthegrapevine said:

I wish that every time you had to use the constant to figure out a math problem, that you would get a slice of real pie to eat while you are figuring out that math problem...

Granted. However, the pies come in every flavor randomly (and I mean every flavor) after the style of the beans in Harry Potter. And to successfully solve the math problem, you must always consume the pie slice.

The effects of this are global, and thus all of the world's computers totally crash, and are severely handicapped until new models are built that are capable of consuming pie slices. Also, the raspberry pi computer model has become wildly popular.

On the bright side, you've indirectly solved world hunger (although even this is a two-edged sword: roughly the same number of people that were dying of hunger are now dying of obesity-related health conditions).

 

I wish for true understanding. Preferably not the variant that would result in going mad from the revelation.

[+Hoiditthroughthegrapevine he/him]

31 minutes ago, Drake Marshall said:

I wish for true understanding. Preferably not the variant that would result in going mad from the revelation.

The Nightwatcher's green vaporous form coils around you, you stare into her alien yet too human face as green wispy tendrils of luminescent vapor pierce your mind.

Suddenly you find yourself standing on a train platform in Sussex, in one hand you hold a newspaper wrapped in a cone, dripping hot oil, filled with sublimely deep fried breaded chunks of cod. In the other hand you hold a train station schedule. In a logical leap that transcends space and time, you realize the true teleological purpose of mankind. The scales have fallen off of your eyes, you perceive the deep and all penetrating truth of the true meaning of life. Looking up, with eyes unclouded by mere petty existence, you see it. You see the face of god, and more importantly you see the train conductor hat that he is wearing and the dingy less than respectable condition of his basement. You my friend have just discovered the reason that we were created, God is a train enthusiast, and we are all part of the greatest scale model train set ever built.

Your curse is that now that God knows that you are aware of his model train set, he wants to get your opinion on his world class stamp collection.

 

I wish that the world would realize that dividing by zero is just as valid as multiplying by zero. If you divide something into nothing parts, for crap's sake you have nothing! Why is it more valid to say A times 0 = 0 then it is to say A divided by 0 = 0?

[Zennix he/him]

33 minutes ago, hoiditthroughthegrapevine said:

I wish that the world would realize that dividing by zero is just as valid as multiplying by zero. If you divide something into nothing parts, for crap's sake you have nothing! Why is it more valid to say A times 0 = 0 then it is to say A divided by 0 = 0?

Boon: The Nightwatcher grants you a free session with a Psychiatrist.

Bane: The Nightwatcher decides that your current state of your mental health is punishment enough for you. So, she takes pity on you and personally accompany so that you won't hurt yourself.

I wish to become an immortal worldhopper. 

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

27 minutes ago, hoiditthroughthegrapevine said:

I wish that the world would realize that dividing by zero is just as valid as multiplying by zero. If you divide something into nothing parts, for crap's sake you have nothing! Why is it more valid to say A times 0 = 0 then it is to say A divided by 0 = 0?

Actually, the math community is secretly okay with dividing by zero. Because you sort of kind of need zero division to do calculus. For example, integrating something is basically the process of dividing zero by zero and getting a finite nonzero result.

But don't tell anybody. It's a secret.

 

Also, I will note that you are a lot more likely to get infinity when you divide something by zero than you are to get zero again. This is part of why zero division is regarded as "impossible", because technically, infinity is not a number in the strictest sense (although lets be honest, we can usually get away with treating it like one, albeit one that follows some unusual rules).

[Guest]

Dividing by zero is indeed completely ok, if you don't care about finding an answer. Because multiplying by zero destroys information (1*0 = 0, 129376*0 = 0 -123*0=0), you can't undo this process by creating information out of nothing (cause you know, dividing supposed's to undo multiplication). Point is, you can still do it. I think it's useful in proofs occasionally in modular arithmetic and number theory. (maybe elsewhere too)

7 hours ago, Zennix said:

Boon: The Nightwatcher grants you a free session with a Psychiatrist.

Bane: The Nightwatcher decides that your current state of your mental health is punishment enough for you. So, she takes pity on you and personally accompany so that you won't hurt yourself.

I wish to become an immortal worldhopper. 

You become an immortal worldhopper. However, that's the only thing you are. You can't walk anywhere now - you have to use your skills. You need a constant supply of Investiture, and you are never able to even move around for the simplest of tasks.

I wish I could be reverse Lift: Absorb Investiture, and then turn it into food.

[+Hoiditthroughthegrapevine he/him]

2 hours ago, theRoyalDingus said:

I wish I could be reverse Lift: Absorb Investiture, and then turn it into food.

Granted, your new name is Chiri Chiri and you're a larkin. You get to live on some nicely potted shinovar grass, and your budy Rysn gives you quite a few spheres to drain a day.

I wish that I could travel to the future, say 150 years, and see the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra (which in the future will be a geosynchronous low space orbit concert venue) perform some classic music. I would wish specifically to see the full orchestra rendition of "More than a Woman" by the Bee Gees.

Edited February 14, 2018 by hoiditthroughthegrapevine

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

9 hours ago, hoiditthroughthegrapevine said:

Granted, your new name is Chiri Chiri and you're a larkin. You get to live on some nicely potted shinovar grass, and your budy Rysn gives you quite a few spheres to drain a day.

I wish that I could travel to the future, say 150 years, and see the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra (which in the future will be a geosynchronous low space orbit concert venue) perform some classic music. I would wish specifically to see the full orchestra rendition of "More than a Woman" by the Bee Gees.

Granted, however after visiting the future you must return and watch the Twilight Trilogy over over and over again for eternity. (You will never die)

I wish that I was a Fullbinder.

[+ElephantEarwax he/him]

13 hours ago, Lord Mistborn Skybreaker said:

Granted, however after visiting the future you must return and watch the Twilight Trilogy over over and over again for eternity. (You will never die)

I wish that I was a Fullbinder.

Granted. You have bonded (Maybe OB spoiler)

Spoiler

Yelig-Nar

You must avoid being consumed.

I wish for a train set.

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

2 hours ago, ElephantEarwax said:

Granted. You have bonded (Maybe OB spoiler)

  Hide contents

Yelig-Nar

You must avoid being consumed.

I wish for a train set.

Granted. You are transported onto an infinite railway network, onboard a beautiful train, and it all belongs to you. Onboard the train is pretty much everything you need to lead a good life, including a complete signed collection of the cosmere books.

Unfortunately, the train never stops and you may not exit it. Every hour you encounter a trolley question scenario on the tracks. Have fun solving ethical dilemmas for the rest of eternity.

 

I wish for a combustible lemon. Preferably one that will not combust in my face or anything of that sort.

[GeneralHZRD he/him]

Granted, but you have no control over when it will combust, so you live your life in constant worry.

 

I wish for exactly 263.5 TicTacs.

[Nathrangking he/him]

6 minutes ago, TheVillageIdiot said:

I wish for exactly 263.5 TicTacs.

Granted. You now have 263.5 tics shaped like tacks that nest in your body.

I call upon the power of the Nightwatcher to fulfill my boon. I wish to have the power of spiritual adhesion and have complete control of this power and knowledge of how it works. 

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

4 hours ago, Nathrangking said:

Granted. You now have 263.5 tics shaped like tacks that nest in your body.

I call upon the power of the Nightwatcher to fulfill my boon. I wish to have the power of spiritual adhesion and have complete control of this power and knowledge of how it works. 

Alas, spirtual adhesion is of Honor and the nightwatcher is unable to grant your wish.

I wish that whoever gives me my curse would do so in old English.

Edited February 16, 2018 by Lord Mistborn Skybreaker

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

15 hours ago, Lord Mistborn Skybreaker said:

Alas, spirtual adhesion is of Honor and the nightwatcher is unable to grant your wish.

I wish that whoever gives me my curse would do so in old English.

Cuman hêr forniman êcnes, attraction with pron ðe ic wiergan êower âsettan tôsprecan ðiclîce nêah ealdlic Englisc!

(I do rather hope you meant old English and not middle English)

Warning: Reference inbound: I wish for blessed greased fixed +2 grey dragon scale mail 

[Glaedr Firnen he/him]

On 9/24/2014 at 9:04 AM, Ashiok said:

sure, but you can't breathe air.

 

No School, but same knowledge and recomendations as somebody who has school

1

Granted, but you will have an unbearably strong desire to attend school that can never be fulfilled.

I want to never age.

 

[Zennix he/him]

Granted. You remain a baby for all eternity.

I wish to use everybody that has posted in this thread for my latest Dark Alley project. 

Edited February 18, 2018 by Zennix

[+Hoiditthroughthegrapevine he/him]

30 minutes ago, Zennix said:

I wish to use everybody that has posted in this thread for my latest Dark Alley project. 

Granted! Unfortunately you kind of mumbled when you made your wish, so you show up to your Dark Alley and see you a whole lot of people who look like this:

You're Dark Alley has been turned into a Dork Alley!

I wish that someone would grant @Drake Marshall's wish:

On 2/16/2018 at 9:54 AM, Drake Marshall said:

Warning: Reference inbound: I wish for blessed greased fixed +2 grey dragon scale mail 

I did some initial internet research to try and figure out what this was referring to, but I could tell that I was seeing shallowly and dimly into an arcane sub-world and that I lack the requisite esoteric knowledge to come up with a suitable bane/boon for this one...