The Battle for the Sandwich

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

4 minutes ago, NerdSandwich said:

You saved the Sandwich from burning by giving it to me >:D.

Yes.

Yes I did.

For there is more to life than Sandwich.

There is the Pizza.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

I yell "Sandwich thread! Go make your own for Pizzas!" and steal the Sandwich from Sandy.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

After yelling at Ketek, I steal the Sandwich back and turn the floor to ice for fun.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

I take up ice hockey.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

21 minutes ago, NerdSandwich said:

After yelling at Ketek, I steal the Sandwich back and turn the floor to ice for fun.

I melt the ice, and you begin to drown in the pool of water that it turns into. I easily grab the Sandwich from your flailing hands and then swim down and join Posiedon in the bottom of the ocean in his water kingdom.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I correct your typo to Poseidon and steal the Sandwich by compounding steel

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

I use an enormous spaceship to crash Earth into Neptune. 

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I make a pizza sandwich, throw it at the spaceship, which narrowly averts the crash.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

I wave as I fly past and collide with Venus instead.

[Deception He/Him]

I summon a horde of angry random forum dudes, who mob NerdSandwich. Unfortunately, in his anger, one of the forum dudes not only steals the actual sandwich but also steals the word off of NerdSandwich's name, turning her into Nerd. Then, I bore the random forum dudes to sleep with a wall of big bolded text about sandwiches before walking over and stealing the sandwich from the now sleeping forum dude. Then, I stick a big , hairy, slimy worm in the sandwich for whoever steals it next to find. Finally, I hold the sandwich, which cannot be destroyed according to the rules of this thread, above my head in an attempt to shield myself from whatever goes boom next.

 

Then, I take the hot potato that keeps getting thrown into this thread and eat it.

Edited June 2 by Deception
Fixed mistake

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I reach my hand into your throat and revive the Hot Potato.

In my anger at being called a boy, I steal the Sandwich.
I am obviously way too sane to be male.

(sarcasm. I'm insane)

Welcome to the Shard!

[Unintelligenius he/him]

I steal the Sandwich from @NerdSandwich, remove the worm that @Deception put in it, and hand everyone a grenade before running off in glee.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

7 hours ago, Unintelligenius said:

I steal the Sandwich from @NerdSandwich, remove the worm that @Deception put in it, and hand everyone a grenade before running off in glee.

I yell "THANK YOU!" and start jumping up and down excitedly, shaking the grenade like a bottle of coca cola

[NerdSandwich she/her]

14 hours ago, Unintelligenius said:

I steal the Sandwich from @NerdSandwich, remove the worm that @Deception put in it, and hand everyone a grenade before running off in glee.

I throw my grenade at you, and while you are distracted, I steal the Sandwich.

[-ACE- he/him]

On 5/6/2026 at 3:10 PM, Unintelligenius said:

I thank you but then am interrupted by a stampede of elephants. I jump onto one of their backs and ride over to @NerdSandwich. Then I grab the Sandwich ride off at the speed of light.

I eat doomslug and jump after you, then slap you until you get taller. I eat your elephants and give the sandwich back to @NerdSandwich before realizing im actually hungry and take it back. Then i prepare to take a big massive bite...

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Thanks for the Sandwich.
Oh no, someone took it, the hamster, again.

>:D

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

I send my secondary pigeon, Gert, to retrieve it. Gert spends the entire time screaming, as you do. 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

On 5/27/2026 at 10:53 PM, Ink and Embers said:

I yell "THANK YOU!" and start jumping up and down excitedly, shaking the grenade like a bottle of coca cola

You blow up.

On 5/28/2026 at 6:05 AM, NerdSandwich said:

I throw my grenade at you, and while you are distracted, I steal the Sandwich.

I kick it away.

On 5/29/2026 at 9:54 AM, -ACE- said:

I eat doomslug and jump after you, then slap you until you get taller. I eat your elephants and give the sandwich back to @NerdSandwich before realizing im actually hungry and take it back. Then i prepare to take a big massive bite...

I sue you for eating my elephants.

I also take the Sandwich from @NerdSandwich, put it in a box, and mail it to china.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

1 minute ago, Unintelligenius said:

You blow up.

I kick it away.

I sue you for eating my elephants.

I also take the Sandwich from @NerdSandwich, put it in a box, and mail it to china.

I randomly decide to vacation in China. I find a box on my doorstep a few days in to my vacation.

Oh look, I have the Sandwich.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

I blow up your vacation home in China and find the Sandwich in the ashes. Then I throw it into a bottle and throw that into the ocean and watch it float away.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Since I was kicked out of my vacation home, I was kicked out of China and swam away. I find the Sandwich and with joy use my Sandwichpowers to go to Roshar.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

5 hours ago, NerdSandwich said:

Since I was kicked out of my vacation home, I was kicked out of China and swam away. I find the Sandwich and with joy use my Sandwichpowers to go to Roshar.

Where you get stabbed through with a shradblade by Szeth.

[Deception He/Him]

But then Retribution revives you because he wants to study the sandwhich. Now a Shard has your snack and won't give it back.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

3 minutes ago, Deception said:

But then Retribution revives you because he wants to study the sandwhich. Now a Shard has your snack and won't give it back.

But it was all a dream! (bold your posts or they don't happen)

 

Szeth retires because he doesn't want to be a plot element anymore.

[Deception He/Him]

Dang it I forgot.

Retribution attacks your world and takes the sandwich to study it

Edited June 3 by Deception
bruh