MistbornAlpaca

I'd love to jump on the submission train this week if there's room! It's been a while since I've submitted and I think I've actually got something worthwhile this time!

I used to be addicted to the Hokey-Pokey, but I turned myself around I was addicted to soap, but now I'm clean

I have seen more movies and read more books than I can count. The only book I can think of that has made me cry is Unbroken... just Unbroken.

Just officially changed my username to MistbornAlpaca. Very surprised it wasn't taken! (Also, I know my profile pic is not an alpaca, but a sheep... BAAAAAAH!!)

@Quell, thanks to my younger siblings I have seen every episode of Phineas and Ferb... at least twice Also, I love your profile pic @Nohadon! Is it a representation of anything in particular?

Ok, so what about usernames on other sites/games? My username for all of the games and sites I sign up for at this point is MistbornAlpaca

Crazy Russain Hacker is great!! Thanks for reminding me of him, I had kinda forgotten about him.

Honestly, I have no clue where my username came from. The Jack part came from my name, (which I'd prefer not to disclose) and the username kinda just popped into my head. It's not very good.

I totally agree with all of these! I would also have like to see the Sleepless, which were notably absent There were a few hints, but they never showed up onscreen.

Thanks for all the advice guys!! I think I'm going to go with a specialty powder that reacts with the alcohol to temporarily erase memories

I would also absolutely be up for @podman36 cussing at me

The Boxtrolls

Very cool profile pic and sig @Queen Elsa Steelheart !!!! (By the way, this is a great thread idea @Del-light-full )

I've actually done a poll on this, that you can find here.

Definitely worth every penny, but I just couldn't bring myself to pay for the snacks

It's been a long time since I've critiques or submitted and I'm happy to be back at it! It looks like I'm the first to comment on this one! Yay! I haven't read the other 2 parts, so @Mandamon take my comments with that in mind Also, I probably would have put a Gore (G) tag on here, just to be safe. Also, you have 2 characters in here whose names start with M, so I'm going to use M to refer to the main character, and Moort. to refer to the other. On page 1, I'm a little confused with whos who. I realize this probably wouldn't have happened if I had read the other two. I think it may also be from you getting confused with names. So I think by the end of page one, the main character is still "I", and his friend is G, and then Moort. is someone else, right? Right off I'm getting the impression that these guys deal with this stuff all the time. They're being very callous, which based on your summary of the other two parts is understandable, just figured I'd point it out. Definitely need a (G) tag on here What are they playing these Melodies on? Is it an instrument? Or something else? I'm really confused but I think reading the other two parts would have solved that for me Ok, so I'm starting to get the impression that by "attuning" (if you don't mind my using that word) the Melody of Potential they're basically watching a replay of what happened? Am I right? Wait!!! G has paws and is furry!?!?! Also something else that probably wouldn't be a problem if I'd read the other parts. I'm not sure if me mentioning these is helpful or not, but I figure I'll point them out just in case they haven't been mentioned in previous parts. The dialogue and voice here on pg. 4 are great! "Thus it was mere happenstance when G called out, "Aha"!" a few minutes later, and I ran to her side." This feels really clunky, especially the "and I ran to her side" part. I'm still a little confused about how all this music/Melody stuff works. Also, I don't know if you're a musician or not, but as far as I know you don't "Tune chords". You tune strings, keys, or other physical parts of the instrument. I don't know if you've thought about this or not, just figured I'd point it out. Ok, I've got the names down, Moort. is someone else that hasn't had a role in this part of the story yet. I still don't understand quite how the Symphonies and Melodies work yet, but I have enough of an understanding now to realize what's going on. When they start talking about how "I" never lived in the mansion I feel like they've gotten a little off track from the problem at hand. The way G goes from a "Wait, what do you mean," to a "You don't have to tell me" feels a bit inauthentic On pg. 9, when M says he could trace who held the weapon, he mentions he could use a combination of symphonies. Is it normal to combine symphonies for specialty use? If it is normal I don't think he would have mentioned that he would combine the two, and instead just say he could trace the weapon. Ok, I'm really starting to understand the symphonies now, which is fantastic, and I love the way you've built it up over the course of this part, although I was a little frustrated in the beginning and I think it could use some more description or explanation in the first part of this part. When G mentions checking the wounds on pg. 9, and M thinks that if F had less hair, G would be green, I got a little confused and it took a few reads of that sentence to figure out that F is the species that G is, and that they have a lot of hair (which is why G is furry). I just wonder if you could make it a little easier to get this at a first glance, maybe mention that G is an F earlier in the story (which you very well may have done in earlier parts) In the second to last paragraph of pg. 9, they decide that Moort. will have more ideas, but they say they can trust them. Was that supposed to be he/her? Or is Moort. a group or species? Up to this point, I have the impression that Moort. is a singular person. Again, you may have established this in previous parts. Ok, so Moort. is a singular person. I think that bit about the them was either a typo, or you were referring to more people and it just didn't come across. Nope, not a typo, I understand now. After finishing the rest of the story, I just have one more comment. Based on what I know of the characters, especially how G kept the body out of her eyesight, I think at least G was acting waay too callous in the beginning when the body was found. Overall I really liked the story! It drew me in and although I was a little confused with the whole Symphony thing, I think I have a basic understanding now, and I'm excited to read more! I might even go back and read the other two parts when I have a minute (which I'm sure are in my inbox somwhere)

I have been thinking about getting this game for a while. I'm glad you like it. Do you think it's worth it? I own and love Netrunner, X-Wing Miniatures, and several others, but my brother is kind of lame and gets tired of a game after playing it maybe ten times, so I'm wondering if the solo play is actually a fun option. What is your opinion?

I honestly couldn't decide. I love them all

Same. I do think they could've toned down the quality to make it more affordable, but I think the game might have suffered and I'm glad they have it where it is. Except that I will not be kickstarting it for that price.

I had already read LoTR at 8, and Eragon shortly followed, and by the time I was 13 I had read both WoK and WoR. However I think the percentage of the 13-year old population that achieves that is relatively small.