Brightness Enna

I have an interesting English teacher. This isn't a rant, though, so I'll skip that part. She gave us an assignment to write a short story (I think she said three pages but mine ended up being 15 ) set in the Wild West of America and using at least one person you know really well. So mine uses a modified version of Wax and Wayne, which is why this is in fan fiction. I changed their names and (sadly) took away their powers. Anyway, I'm a little upset but mostly confused by some of my teacher's comments. I wrote in third person limited from a specific character's point of view, but she seems to think I wrote in third omniscient and thus strayed a little too far into first person, seeing as I give the character's opinion on things he's observing. She has a specific problem with a phrase on page 4 of the document (3rd page of the story), when it is talking about "Owen" pulling a "dang rock" out of his pocket. Yeah, the phrasing is weird, but her beef is with the fact that my character is commenting on what he's seeing in that way. I don't see a problem with the concept. Of course, I'm biased. It's my story. So I wanted to ask for some feedback, both for that specific problem and for anything else. Let me know! I'm attaching the story as a .pdf. Thanks, you guys! Looking forward to some criticism. WANTED Dragon David.pdf

That's really cool! Wish I could do something neat like this instead of tests. Your art and stuff is looking great. I don't have a Facebook, but I wish I did to help! I think some of my friends might be willing, though. That food looks really good. Seriously.

Hi! You can embed images straight into a post. I'm not sure how to do it when you're starting a thread but I don't think it would be very different. All you do is click the "More Reply Options", then use the "Attach Files" thing at the bottom of the replying box thingy, then click "Add to Post" once you upload and attach the file. It'll give you something like this: and you can see the picture when you post! Ta-da! I'm on a school computer right now so I can't see your artwork (deviantart's blocked ) but I'll look at it as soon as I have a chance! Good luck with the art things and general technology things.

Ha, oops. Sorry! Granted. The obvious thing to do here would be to prevent your favorite or the nicer characters from becoming real, but I totally get you and would like that, too. So you get whatever characters you want. However, most of them are really confused when you pull them through, and they spend most of their time being sad and pining for their own world and companions. You can send them back and bring them here as many times as you want, though. It was a good wish/boon and I don't want to mess it up too bad. I wish for the ability to make others happy.

I think the Nightwatcher doesn't appreciate you trying to take over her powers. She gives you a broken sword instead. It's sharp as a storm but lacking a point. Boon: free sword! It won't ever break. It loves you. It will never leave your side. Bane: it is broken. It doesn't leave so you get arrested for having an unauthorized deadly weapon. Oh, you live in a dystopian novel, now, too. Good luck. I wish for more money, more than or equal to 100,000 USD. Thank you.

Granted. They are already out... of print. You slept right through it, Rip-Van-Winkle style. Your bane is that the beard you grew during that nap will always grow straight back after you try and get rid of it. I wish for a self-heating mug so that my tea will never get cold while I'm drinking it and internet-ing at the same time.

Granted. It's over. You and your coworkers, though, find that you have nothing to do. Your pay rates go down and you starve. Your bane is that after you almost starve to death, the economy booms, and another project more heinous than the last starts up. Your participation is required. You have money to eat bu no time so you continue to starve. I wish for two Saturdays this weekend, not replacing Sunday, so that we have time to go get that Stormlight companion thing downtown and study for finals.

Okay. You're a Returned and you don't need Breath to stay that way. You forget your family, friends, and everything you've learned since fourth grade. On the plus side, you're bigger and better looking. And people respect you, though most of the people in the world already have a religion and aren't likely to worship you. Your bane is that you need to eat an entire tree (at least 5 years old) every week or you die. Your body chemistry has been changed to allow this to happen. I wish for the printer to work.

Getting my little brother to stop playing video games and do something productive is just as bad as building a wall out of moldy hamburger buns on a windy day. ... because going to the doctor afterward is inevitable. It's also totally useless and impossible.

Beautiful wish for keteks are keteks for wishing beautifully Okay... I kind of succeeded. Anyway, granted. You now know how to write keteks. Your bane is that you had to take a four-year program to do it. (They are difficult to write meaningfully, after all.) This means that you are now four years older, your current job/school/stuff was on hold, and you accomplished basically nothing. Unless you are savvy and learn how to make money from it. Then hey, go you. I wish to be constantly hydrated without worrying about it. (Without drowning, either.)

That's what I always assumed. Aren't there a few places that specify that Vin or whoever pulls vials out of their sash? Also, I always pictured the mistcloaks without any leather or fabric on the shoulders - just a million strips of the same fabric (which, for some reason, I assumed was some kind of gray raw silk with a soft leather lining) literally sewn together at the top in a few layers. So the strips are more gradual triangles that meet at their small ends and clasp with some sort of lacing.

Pre-Reod (or post-book) Elantrian, obviously. (Let's pretend it will work perfectly anywhere.) No risk of the power source running out - I can keep an Aon going indefinitely. I can do pretty much whatever Lightweavers can, plus teleport, make people feel happy (I would seriously use Omi way too often), heal other people, and a million more things we don't know about. The accuracy requirement and studying needed doesn't even faze me. Bonus side effect: I now look super cool but can change my appearance however I want to make other people more comfortable. Plus clothes and things. Ultimate cosplayer. (Aside: could you use Aons in a sort of programming language? Like, "if a person touches the middle of this, glow and make the wind chimes blow" or, a little more nebulously using Spiritual connection (like I know how that works. psh), "however this person expects to see me, make them see it")

This one is more of a "Sharders are Sanderfans and I can prove it..." but it was too funny to pass up. Go to the forum homepage. Scroll down to the very bottom. In the stats, the farthest right number is about the record of most online. The number as I see it is 640. Hover over the number and it will tell you what date that number came from. Ours is February 14. Valentine's Day. Obviously, most of us consider ourselves "in a relationship" but probably not with real people... Personally, I ship Ennadolin and ignore the fact that Shallan already has him.

Granted. You re-learn how to multiply numbers, but spend so much time doing it that you forget every other math topic you supposedly learned this year. Your bane is that, from now on, you will never be able to guess the age of any person you see, with the exception of children under ten. This means that you will not be able to tell if you should be humble or haughty around a person. (In high school terms, this means you're a junior for eternity - mostly sure that everybody is younger than you but not wanting to guess in case they're actually a senior.) I wish for the effortlessness of improvising on the piano that comes with decades of practice, without having to wait at all. (Like this awesome person)

Granted. Khriss teaches you how to sew socks. Then leaves on some important task. Your bane is that all water from now on will taste just slightly like mint. No matter what you put in it or what the water goes in. (pasta, kool-aid, artichokes, those awesome pudding-brownie hybrid things...) I wish to know which lane will go the fastest whenever I approach an intersection. And be able to get into said lane.

Using your powers of imagination to futilely imagine using Abrasion to weave among cars on the freeway. Sigh. Also, using copious amounts of Stormlight to lash the zippers on a backpack closed rather than zipping them closed yourself. Making a soulstamp from aluminum. Drawing Aon Ashe on a working floodlight.

Granted. You now have the ability to become guilty in every court ruling you are ever part of. Your bane is that you are never tried for the things you did do wrong. I wish for my laundry to magically do and fold itself.

When an assignment is to write a short story set in the Wild West-y Utah and one of the characters is a person you know well... so you use Wax and Wayne with different names and change their powers to fit your world. (sadly, Wayne isn't as great simply because I'm not actually Sanderson.) (plus there are dragons. They never said it had to be realistic.)

Granted. Your brain now thinks very quickly and you even go on to win whatever intellectual competition you wish, whether it be a science fair, spelling bee, or quiz show. Now, whenever you pass a truck on the road, whether you are driving or riding, you have an almost-uncontrollable urge to go to the bathroom. I wish to dream lucidly and control said dreams.

Yes, I know. As soon as I saw your picture, I was thinking, "you know, I could get the right colors of fluffy yarn and do something like this, then crochet many chains (that's about the extent of my crocheting skills) and sew them on." Still haven't ruled it out. Probably won't be as good as yours though. Did anybody decorate Easter eggs? My family did... and from 24, there were 4 Sanderson themed ones. 3 from me and 1 from my little brother, who I first got to read Steelheart by reading him the prologue while he was playing video games, then got him into Mistborn, and now he's reading Stormlight. Anyway. He drew the atium symbol on one in crayon. I drew an AonOmi, though it sort of failed, the Edgedancer glyph with their second ideal written on the back, and a Parshendi one... It had black spots drawn in crayon and the rest was dyed reddish brown. I think it looks cool. If I ever get pictures I'll post 'em. It was a fun day.

I used onlinehtmleditor.net. I don't know if it worked, though it looks pretty dang neat. Good job! As to this crocheted Vin... I want one. Please. Too bad there aren't crocheting machines that can assemble them.

Done. You can't do anything with them, though. They cannot be written or spoken of, only existing perfectly in your head. I wish for a lifetime supply of sunshine I can call into the sky whenever I want. (why is it snowing just as we were getting excited for spring?!? Storming Utah.)

Woops, thanks. Guess I'll go change that. You make a good point. Preservation isn't Honor. I guess I got caught up in how Preservation is the "good" force and Ruin is the "bad", mostly ignoring intent. I can almost see why Vin was considered Lawful Good, but at the same time, someone else may have made more sense. Dalinar, maybe? Kaladin, kinda? Maybe Sarene or Raoden could count, too. Still, I pretty much wholeheartedly agree with the rest of the chart. (I can't decide - is chaotic evil Stormfather or Odium? Because Stormfather doesn't make much sense to me.)

You now understand everything! (Provided it's explained to you first.) Concepts are very easy for you to grasp. Know, though, that this doesn't mean you can solve the world's problems magically. You just get things quickly. However, your imagination is worthless now and every explanation needs very clear graphics. Also, it is near-impossible for you to write anything original or speak without quoting every sentence from another source. I wish that multiple Disneylands (CA) existed: one for each year the park has been open, with corresponding developments in its history, and all are available for me and other people to visit.