The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[+Doomstick he/him]

Narrator Stick asked for spoiler tags to be added.

this thread generally doesn't really talk much about the cosmere, seeing as we have our own diverging universe where Elend's cousin is immortal, Kelsnah adopted Lift, etc.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

The spoiler cops started blaring their sirens.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

"I edited my post!" you cry. "Please don't arrest me!"

[Quivil]

"You're going to DIE for that!" they yell

[Bridge-Four he/him]

And you burst with Stormlight as you say the first ideal "Crem before cremlings!" 

[Random Bystander she/her]

"And ducks!"

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

The chase was (is?) on! You speed your spaceship up to max speed and jet for the oragne planet, which you momentarily forgot the name of.

Edited April 20, 2021 by Szeth_Pancakes

[Bridge-Four he/him]

But most importantly, the ship was made of cremlings

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Invested cremlings

[Bridge-Four he/him]

Now looking back at the orange planet, you realise it was completely orange in color

[+Doomstick he/him]

the Oragnes still ruled, though

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

You grab as many oragnes as you can from the orange planet, then blast off in your cremling ship.

[Bridge-Four he/him]

To fight the big bad, it seemed.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

The big bad was mysterious, big, and bad. However, you really just wanted the oranges to give to Lani, so that she would give you upvotes.

[Bridge-Four he/him]

But she did not give you the upvotes and then you realise that Lani was the big bad all this time.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

"Oh no!" You cry. Suddenly, Hoid

 

[+Doomstick he/him]

the Big Bad was the codename of Dr. Who Octopus' next plan for multiverse domination, Tani was his latest pawn

[Bridge-Four he/him]

This one is for Szeth_Pancakes

once again starts playing the flute while riding a kite.

Edited April 20, 2021 by Bridge-Four

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

"Well, this is awkward," you say. "Now we have two conflicting timelines!"

[Bridge-Four he/him]

"We could merge them" you say as you suddenly Ascend and become the Shard of Timeliness.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

And then you merge them!

 

[Bridge-Four he/him]

This was necessarily not done for plot convenience

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

You and Good Hoid (from the flute universe) face off against Evil Hoid and Lani.

[Bridge-Four he/him]

The evil Hoid had a harp though

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

You blast Evil Hoid and Lani with your Investiture Laser. (Yes, this is how Investiture works.)