The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

Vilgho backflips into a seat and pops his knuckles in a manner he hopes is threatening. (He rolls a 4 on intimidation. He looks like a 7 year old trying to scare somebody). “Cards, eh?” Vilgho asks, a twinkle in his eye. It’s been a while since he played a good game of cards. “I’m game.”

[xinoehp512 he/him]

X suggested Scum.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

“Alright mister,” Vilgho says, “you think you can beat the best of the best? Well you better think again, because I’m the scum master himself! Monks from the Spine of the World taught me how to play!”

Vilgho begins to deal out the cards with his mouth, just as the monks had taught him.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

X's avatar accepted the hand dealt to him.

[+Doomstick he/him]

Stick wondered why X's avatar was holding a severed hand

[Quivil]

Reva snatches the cards from Vilgho. "Keep the cards away from your mouth." She looks at them again. "Waitaminute... These are my cards! Thief!" she cries, and thwacks him over the head with them.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

Vilgho lets out a squawk-like noise as he takes 2 damage. He then uses wild shape and lets out an actual squawk as he turns into a parrot, flying around with the cards in his beak, before settling down and laying down his first card: a five of spades.

[+Doomstick he/him]

Butt played a 7 of diamonds, face down

[Quivil]

Reva gumbles at Vilgho and stomps off.

[+Doomstick he/him]

You decide that the second person POV is the best way to continue

[xinoehp512 he/him]

X's avatar plays the seven of hearts, skipping the next person's turn.

[+Doomstick he/him]

You eye the 6.75 of stars, but end up playing the 12 of squares

[xinoehp512 he/him]

X's avatar is suspicious of the card. He is fairly certain that such a card does not exist in a standard 52-card playing deck!

[The Technovore he/him]

You eye your opponent, who is clearly suspicious of your 5th-dimensionsal scum tactics. Fortunately, you have an ace in the hole. You reach for the Glock that's strapped to your thigh...

Edited March 29, 2021 by The Technovore
*your

[xinoehp512 he/him]

X's avatar decides to take that as a pass and plays the eight of spades.

[Quivil]

Taniel plays the green 9.

[The Technovore he/him]

You slap down a green skip, then follow up with a red skip, and finally a red +2, followed by a red 4. "Uno!" You shout in triumph, before descending into maniacal villianous laughter.

Upon reread it is clear that I have no idea how Uno works. 

Edited March 29, 2021 by The Technovore

[xinoehp512 he/him]

Unwittingly, however, you have played the draw-2 on yourself!

[+Doomstick he/him]

so you put two cards back into the deck.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

From someone else!

[+Doomstick he/him]

then you return x cards from your graveyard to your hand, where x equals the amount of +1/+1 counters on the 6.75 of spades

[xinoehp512 he/him]

X's avatar jumped in with a house!

[+Doomstick he/him]

the game is generally skewed in the house's favor

[Quivil]

Taniel decides she doesn't like this game anymore. "Anyone want to play 31?" She steals all the cards, shuffles them, and starts dealing without waiting for responses.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

X divides by two.