the most useless uses for useful powers

[WayneSpren he/him]

well, mostly I figure experimental hemalurgy (side note: cosmere band name?) would be a good way to you know, kill some folks, which Ruin seems pretty ok wio

I'll be the drummer in your new band.

[Landis963 he/him]

Using Ruin's edit powers to spellcheck.  

[natc]

Use shardic future sight to see if you should dodge in LoL ranked solo queue.

[Alfa he/him]

Kill harmony and absorb his power.

Spike somebody.

Give the hemalurgic spike to your friend.

Now you can hear his/her thoughts ans speak to him/her. Cheaper than mobile phones.

[Lord Ruler he/him]

Try putting 1000 breaths into a honor blade and giving it the command "chill out bro"

 

Or for something actually useful- Create a bend alloy bubble (so duralium effects last longer) then duralium atium and read WoK 3.

 

Actually a combo of duralium and bend alloy is a really good idea for metals other than iron and steel, because you get duralium effects for such a long time. You just have to time your bend alloy bubble so it starts just after you burn duralium. You get duralium strong for an incredibly long time. Too bad there aren't any mist born in Wayne and Waxes time...

Edited October 4, 2015 by Supernile

[Alfa he/him]

Try putting 1000 breaths into a honor blade and giving it the command "chill out bro"

 

As far as I recall how awakening works, this will end in an incredible frigid honorblade

[Lord Ruler he/him]

Or for something actually useful- Create a bend alloy bubble (so duralium effects last longer) then duralium atium and read WoK 3.

 

Actually a combo of duralium and bend alloy is a really good idea for metals other than iron and steel, because you get duralium effects for such a long time. You just have to time your bend alloy bubble so it starts just after you burn duralium. Too bad there aren't any mist born in Wayne and Waxes time...

[Kurkistan he/him]

I'm not quite so sure on the assumption that duralumin effects would last longer inside a bendalloy bubble.

[kinxer he/him]

I'm fairly certain Duralumin effects would only last longer in relation to the world outside of the bubble (arguably objectively longer) but would last the same amount of time subjectively for the Allomancer. Now, this isn't based on hard WoB, but it fits better with what we've seen of time bubbles (and Kurkistan can correct me if I'm wrong).

[Kurkistan he/him]

It would appear that metals burn at a rate that aligns with time subjective to the allomancer. So if you have a pair of Coinshots each with 10 minutes of steel, then start both of them burning and put one inside a 10x Bendalloy bubble, one minute later the one outside the bubble will have 9 minutes left and the one inside of it will be out.

 

Even without needing to interpret the linked WoP, we've seen no evidence that Allomancers inside fast/slow bubbles experience odd burn rates. Wayne's a bad example because he'd be used to it, but Wax never indicates anything about changed burn rates while inside of Wayne's speed bubble, and while it's not a perfect example since he might just not have burned Allomantic gold during that period, Miles never notices when he's put inside Marasi's slow bubble.

[Dunkum he/him]

all else aside, the moment you started burning the duralumin, you would also supercharge your bendalloy, and run out of that.  I guess you might briefly have a very large time bubble, or else the brief moment of burning supercharged bendalloy would last even less time to an outside observer...

[Young Bard he/him]

Using Hemalurgic Spikes as a fashion statement. (Somehow, I don't think it will catch on, though.)

[Malatium]

Permanently fill steel and zync, live in slow-motion

Fill Atium all your live, more in the beginning, going less and less with every year. Around forty instead start tapping it, more every year: You are now Benjamin Button

Fill away your sense of identity then compound determination, you are determined to be nobody

Wouldnt slow motion be when you're brain capacity is faster rather then slower ?

Fill a copper mind with a false personality and have a different personality every day

[kinxer he/him]

Fill a copper mind with a false personality and have a different personality every day

So far as we know, Copperminds can't store personality, only memories. Aluminumminds, however, may just do that. Alternately, you could just make it appear that you have different personalities all the time by storing and drawing from an Electrummind, thus being either manic or depressive on a particular day.

 

Also, welcome to the forums, but please don't multipost. You're able to edit your posts if you need to say something new right then. Enjoy the forums!

[Young Bard he/him]

Forge a stamp to make a table... exactly the way it already is.

 

Make a metal balloon without the string. Balance it in the air with your Coinshot-abilities.

[Stormgate he/him]

That actually would be fun.

[Ookla the Absent]

Using Hemalurgic Spikes as a fashion statement. (Somehow, I don't think it will catch on, though.)

I'm in!

[Stormgate he/him]

Soulcasting yourself into fire to keep yourself warm.

[Brightness Enna she/her]

This might have already been said, but...

 

Tap (or even better, compound) both steel and zinc and read. 

 

Awaken a clock in class to get out early.

 

Tap chromium while juggling for the first time.

 

Lightweave a copy of yourself taking notes while the real you has a nap or reads more books.

 

Use perfect pitch to tell when a professional musician messes up.

 

Tap connection to make little kids love you and always request you as a babysitter (so this is what happened with Vasher). Burn cadmium to pass the time away while you're babysitting.  Awaken some clothing to make sure that the kids don't touch any knives.

 

Forge a game console to be another one, like from a Nintendo to an XBox. Do the same with all the games.

 

Use Aon Tia to get to the other side of the couch so you can reach the refrigerator.

[kinxer he/him]

Use Aon Tia to get to the other side of the couch so you can reach the refrigerator.

You can reach your fridge from your couch?

Awaken an ocean with the Command "Wave!"

[Khmauv he/him]

Forge a forged item to have never been forged.

[Stormgate he/him]

Storing lots of health in a goldmind, swallowing it, then burning aluminum. Assume TLR is doing this for some reason.

[natc]

Awaken the Internet to Destroy Illegal Activity.

Internet eliminates 90% of itself, then tries to hack the Pentagon and kill us all for pirating music.

[Stormgate he/him]

But who wields the Internet?

[king of nowhere]

Awaken the Internet to Destroy Illegal Activity.

Internet eliminates 90% of itself, then tries to hack the Pentagon and kill us all for pirating music.

Mind you, if we could awaken the internet to only Destroy Really Bad Illegal Activity, it could be the single most useful application of  awakening.

 

I wonder how many breaths it would take to awaken the whole internet. And what kind of collateral effect could span from infusing massive amounts of investiture in something that is already almost a neural net by itself. Also, I wonder what would happen if the command was to Destroy Immoral Activity, and the internet decided to judge what is moral by making polls in forums. I may have nightmares for it.