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Posted
On 9/26/2025 at 12:49 PM, AltonicKeys said:

Granted. They turn against you because you are not part of the narrative and thus you are a wrench in their plans. And then they turn against themselves because they're not supposed to be here either.

I wish for laser eye beams like Cyclops from X-Men (but they're actual lasers and not stupid punch dimension energy) (being blind is a justifiable trade-off for laser eyes)

Thats actually suprisingly accurate to the novel T^T

18 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Granted. They keep fretting over the stupidest things

I wish to feel something other than amusement and vague pity watching my school’s football team lose every game (at least this year there have been 2 games we lost by LESS than 50 points. Last season there was only one…)

Granted, you feel the need to read ORV

I wish for dragon

Posted
2 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Thats actually suprisingly accurate to the novel T^T

Granted, you feel the need to read ORV

I wish for dragon

Funnily enough I actually have been feeling the itch lol

Granted. He’s setting ur house on fire right now. He’s just not very skilled at baking…

I wish for getting enough sleep for once

Posted
17 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Thats actually suprisingly accurate to the novel T^T

Granted, you feel the need to read ORV

I wish for dragon

(Just realized what ORV stands for I am a fool. but uh no I read the webtoon and then dropped it. forgot why oooops)

13 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Funnily enough I actually have been feeling the itch lol

Granted. He’s setting ur house on fire right now. He’s just not very skilled at baking…

I wish for getting enough sleep for once

Granted. Every morning you wake up refreshed like a baby. But the night before. That's when the nightmare starts. Not actually nightmares but the bed is full of hot nails and so is the pillow. There are noises outside your window. Construction? Building a park? A dog park full of dogs anyways? More likely than you think. Also your throat is really dry. But you can't get water, because it's dark. And that's scary. Due to the evil monster I placed in your home. Good luck soldier.

I wish for a really nice pot of pasta

Posted
7 minutes ago, AltonicKeys said:

(Just realized what ORV stands for I am a fool. but uh no I read the webtoon and then dropped it. forgot why oooops)

Granted. Every morning you wake up refreshed like a baby. But the night before. That's when the nightmare starts. Not actually nightmares but the bed is full of hot nails and so is the pillow. There are noises outside your window. Construction? Building a park? A dog park full of dogs anyways? More likely than you think. Also your throat is really dry. But you can't get water, because it's dark. And that's scary. Due to the evil monster I placed in your home. Good luck soldier.

I wish for a really nice pot of pasta

It’s really kind but it hates you

I wish I still had a marimba at my house

Posted
59 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Funnily enough I actually have been feeling the itch lol

Granted. He’s setting ur house on fire right now. He’s just not very skilled at baking…

I wish for getting enough sleep for once

READ IT

and a burning house + dragon is better than no dragon

44 minutes ago, AltonicKeys said:

(Just realized what ORV stands for I am a fool. but uh no I read the webtoon and then dropped it. forgot why oooops)

Granted. Every morning you wake up refreshed like a baby. But the night before. That's when the nightmare starts. Not actually nightmares but the bed is full of hot nails and so is the pillow. There are noises outside your window. Construction? Building a park? A dog park full of dogs anyways? More likely than you think. Also your throat is really dry. But you can't get water, because it's dark. And that's scary. Due to the evil monster I placed in your home. Good luck soldier.

I wish for a really nice pot of pasta

go to orv.pages.dev and re-read. I will tell you a secret if you read the first chapter

37 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

It’s really kind but it hates you

I wish I still had a marimba at my house

Granted, but it is literally on fire

I wish @AltonicKeys would read ORV all the way to ch 551

Posted

um. granted, in advance... (I did not enjoy the webtoon so this is gonna be at the bottom of my reading list) (No guarantee I'll enjoy it written out though)

I wish I get the motivation to finish all my projects

Posted
2 hours ago, AltonicKeys said:

um. granted, in advance... (I did not enjoy the webtoon so this is gonna be at the bottom of my reading list) (No guarantee I'll enjoy it written out though)

I wish I get the motivation to finish all my projects

Well... there is a meme in the ORV community that is people leaving ORV early because it is too 'cliche'

but Granted, but only if you finish your motivation

i wish for orange

Posted

(No yeah it was mad cliche I got sick of the OP main character plot armor shenanigans) Granted, you get green instead. The fruit is technically in the same family as an orange, but it's incredibly sour instead. Not even any trace of sweetness like in a yellow. And the skin is horribly bitter. The whole thing is really the opposite of sublime. Maybe you will call it superlime.

I wish I could come up with better names for stuff

Posted
17 minutes ago, AltonicKeys said:

(No yeah it was mad cliche I got sick of the OP main character plot armor shenanigans) Granted, you get green instead. The fruit is technically in the same family as an orange, but it's incredibly sour instead. Not even any trace of sweetness like in a yellow. And the skin is horribly bitter. The whole thing is really the opposite of sublime. Maybe you will call it superlime.

I wish I could come up with better names for stuff

(Well, that's the point. If you can bear through it, it is way deeper than originally thought) Granted, but all of them are the exact same word.

I wish for better writing skills

Posted

Granted. However, you can only write in Klingon and it's always backwards.

I wish for an army of rubber ducks.

Posted

Granted. They flood the streets. You try to command them, but it's so crowded that they can only move about half an inch per hour. Not like they could move much faster if it was uncrowded though. They don't have legs, or any limbs really. They can only hope for the wind to help them. At least you have several tons of rubber cooking under the sun. The fumes will probably kill someone eventually. Whether this will be your target or a bystander is up to chance.

I wish I can read the entirety of Hitchhiker's Guide without having to go back to understand stuff.

  • 3 weeks later...
Posted
On 10/14/2025 at 12:39 PM, AltonicKeys said:

Granted. They flood the streets. You try to command them, but it's so crowded that they can only move about half an inch per hour. Not like they could move much faster if it was uncrowded though. They don't have legs, or any limbs really. They can only hope for the wind to help them. At least you have several tons of rubber cooking under the sun. The fumes will probably kill someone eventually. Whether this will be your target or a bystander is up to chance.

I wish I can read the entirety of Hitchhiker's Guide without having to go back to understand stuff.

Granted. You may read the phrase “Hitchhiker’s guide without having to go back to understand stuff”

I wish I was able to add more hours to the day so I could have time for things like sleep, reading, and the shard

Posted
20 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

Granted. You may read the phrase “Hitchhiker’s guide without having to go back to understand stuff”

I wish I was able to add more hours to the day so I could have time for things like sleep, reading, and the shard

Granted, but you must use the majority of the time for READING ORV *laughs evily*

I wish I could EXPLODE INTO CONFETTI

Posted

Granted, but it happens every time you think about ORV and you take an hour to recoalesce. If you think about ORV as confetti, the process starts over.

I wish I could be able to wipe my memories of a book to read it for the first time again.

Posted
10 hours ago, Booknewt said:

Granted, but it happens every time you think about ORV and you take an hour to recoalesce. If you think about ORV as confetti, the process starts over.

I wish I could be able to wipe my memories of a book to read it for the first time again.

Granted, but when you wipe your memories of a book you also wipe all your memories so you forget everything, including how to read.

I wish for some water.

Posted
8 hours ago, Uninteligenius said:

Granted, but when you wipe your memories of a book you also wipe all your memories so you forget everything, including how to read.

I wish for some water.

Granted, it fills your lungs and you drown on dry land

I wish I could summon the ‘hero‘ “tried-to-milk-badger man” and have him follow my every command

Posted

Granted! You are now acutely aware that you are going to be hit by a bus sometime within the next week, and it completely dominates your waking thoughts :P.

I wish for the mental fortitude and intelligence to win every argument I engage in!

Posted

Granted! No one likes talking to you anymore because you're always right (or at least stubborn enough to make the other person wrong). You've got a promising future as a lawyer though.

I wish my phone can load stuff in a shorter time than 30 seconds

Posted
55 minutes ago, AltonicKeys said:

Granted! No one likes talking to you anymore because you're always right (or at least stubborn enough to make the other person wrong). You've got a promising future as a lawyer though.

I wish my phone can load stuff in a shorter time than 30 seconds

Granted but now each thing you open is only there for 30 seconds before it loads something else

i wish for a new French horn

Posted

Granted. You get a New France horn. Due to colonization, it's been renamed to the Quebec Horn. It's an antique horn, a buisine. One of those long medieval horns. It sucks.

I wish I have the willpower to get out of bed earlier

Posted

Granted. You now have more than enough willpower to get out of bed earlier. However, you lose the ability to physically get up earlier, so you can't get up anyway.

I wish to be able to consistently be able to draw good pictures.

Posted
11 minutes ago, Conure1243 said:

Granted. You now have more than enough willpower to get out of bed earlier. However, you lose the ability to physically get up earlier, so you can't get up anyway.

I wish to be able to consistently be able to draw good pictures.

Granted. However, you can never draw excellent pictures. 

I wish I had more time.

Posted
On 11/12/2025 at 4:15 PM, KnightSkye Reforged said:

Granted. However, you can never draw excellent pictures. 

I wish I had more time.

Granted. However, you are stuck in the same moment forever.

I wish that I could have the ability to freely move to different parts of my life.

Posted
5 minutes ago, IlliterateDragon said:

Granted. However, you are stuck in the same moment forever.

I wish that I could have the ability to freely move to different parts of my life.

Granted, you now experience your life different parts at a time… However, you experience time linearly, and so the different “parts” are just the next second. So nothing changes

I wish to have a slice of pizza, try and mess that up : )

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