Edema Rue

Rue waves back. “Rue is fine! Um…hi!”

Rue understood the statement; Root surpassed all prior loyalties. She lifted her own jar and started to chug.

Honor is goat dead so long as he lives in the hearts of men.

Rue and Him were besties. They even shared their weird hats and shoes. She suddenly realized that she’s inadvertently changed sides simply for root. Was that addiction? Nah.

“Uh…Rue? Rue Sedai?”

“Uh…I…IfeeluselessandIhavenoideawhatimdoing?”

I…by the other attackers I meant the other people storming the fortress…but okay! Rue was very disturbed by this, but she knew that the tacks were only a minor offense. They could still be friends. “Would you like a cup of root? We can wear silly shoes too, if it makes you happy.” And so it was that the root cult doubled in size.

After all, she was forced to wear a strange hat as well. But she didn’t mind, because it meant an unlimited supply of Root. At least, until she met the other attackers…

Whoops. I’m a Utahn.

Safer isn’t always better; if the characters in books always chose the safer route, think how boring it would be. With greater pain comes greater capability for happiness. …but I define myself as like a 3. I’m awful at following my own advice.

Rue looks up. She’s alone. How long has she been alone? And why does her head hurt so much? “Guysh?” She says, wondering why her voice sounds so slurred. “I fink I found da Root storage.”

Wasps and woodchucks kill platypai

We all watch him leave. “Well, now that he’s gone, let’s storm this huge door!” Rue shouts, and everyone cheers and follows her.

Fine I’m back. YESSSSSS ATTACK THE PLATYPUS!!

I’m leaving.

"We're all idiots." Rue says, teleporting the base to us. Unfortunately, it's a huge fortress, and we all have to run to avoid being squished. "Should we go in?" She asks, heading towards the stone monolith.

Being sick is rough, but thank goodness you don't have covid!

Oh okay, wasps are tasty. Don't you just love mowing the lawn and backing up into a wasp nest? (Don't get a heart attack imagining it please).

A GREAT BIG SQUASH JUST SAT UPON MY HAT.

I am in class, but that's irrelevant. I'm also a girl, but apparently that's also irrelevant...?

How do you know I'm a people?

“Don’t worry about it!” Rue told him. “It’s normal. Mostly. In unusual situations. It’ll probably come back. In the meantime, who wants to kill Subversion?”

Luckily, none of us were mortals, so we didn’t flee.

How did that this plan would work?

Nope. As you proved in your first haiku, the second line has 8 syllables. And the other two have 18. Breathing is good for you.