Going_North_cal

hey chat, it’s me 

Crow

cals girlfriend

i stole the phone hehehehe 

im having funnnn

love yal

re tested per policy after mondays negative results

 tested positive. lol i have covid

that moment when everyone in my family but me has covid and so now i have to keep the house from burning down and take care of everyone lol haha

i’m fine lol haha

My friends,

My mission call for The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints gets here on Tuesday  

At 7 PM CST, there will be a facebook live here where I will read aloud my call.

The live will begin promptly at 6:50, to allow people time to join and get ready, and at 7:00 PM sharp, I will introduce myself, who’s with me, and then read my call.

I’d love for you all to watch if you can.

Alonzo leaned back on the railing. Below him, cars sped by, on their way to and from different parts of the city. The City of Open Eyes, they called it. Never sleeping, always hustle-and-bustle, full of dreams and joy and knowledge.

Until you looked four floors up, third penthouse from the corner of 16th Street and 301st Street, in the Suite Quarter of the city, where Alonzo Delano smoked a cigar as if nothing were happening.

When in fact, just in front of him, strings were subtly being tugged and pulled to meet his will.

Gods above, being in the mafia had its perks.

”This seems too good to be true,” said Eduardi, Alonzo’s protege. “I mean honestly, we mess with one guy, and suddenly everything falls into place?”

Alonzo took a long puff on his cigar. The cigar was authentic and exotic, of course, from a small country far, far across the sea. Painstakingly crafted for optimal burn and flavor, it was the only brand Alonzo smoked.

”You wouldn’t know if something was too good to be true unless it shot you in the face, Dua,” Alonzo noted with a smirk, “Believe me, things may be falling into place, but there’s still a lot left to do.”

”The Marion’s are gearing up, Alo,” Eduardi said, tugging at his collar. He hated formal wear, but Alonzo insisted he wear it; appearances mattered. They always mattered. “You know they’re gonna come after us eventually.”

”I’m counting on it,” Alonzo said, flicking ash from his cigar. It fluttered softly to the busy street below. “They’re as much a part of all this as we are. They’re just fortunate enough to be ignorant of their usefulness.”

”You’d better be right about this, boss,” Eduardi muttered, staring at the man inside the suite. He was slumped in his chair, bloodied, beaten, and all but dead. But he’d be dead soon anyway, so who cared?

Why be gentle with a bruised apple when you know it’ll be crushed just a few minutes later?

”I’m always right. I didn’t get this far by being wrong, Dua. Nobody, nobody, messes with my family and gets away with it. I’ll rain down hellfire itself if I have to.”

Alonzo flicked his cigar into the garbage and walked inside. He had a job to finish.

“so cal, how’s music going?”

”oh you know… in order to upload a small EP, i had to bypass four different security/restrictive measures just so my distributor could access the Spotify API and i could select my artist profile.”

”hopefully that was the only stressful thing tonight?”

”nope, had to go through and pick the few google docs i want to keep from my school email account because it’s being terminated july 15th. then i had to separately export the data i wanted, ensure that any third party services that i held accounts with using my school email were appropriately edited, and i had to navigate google photos as i deleted nearly 4,000 photos that for some reason backed up from my phone ever though i never even wanted that.”

”…have you had a long day?”

”yes.”

HEY NEBRASKANS

GUESS WHAT BASTARDS

I MIGHT BE COMIN TO SEE YALL

WITH MY MOTHER BECAUSE SHES AWESOME

SO

YEAH

DETAILS AT SOME POINT

people often ask me

”cal, how did you manage to pull such a hot girlfriend?”

and i always respond with one word:

”autism.”

considering pulling an all nighter

thoughts?

8 minutes into june 1st.

which means 8 minutes into PRIDE MONTH.

i am a proud omnisexual and genderfluid individual, a solid ally to all those just trying to exist and be good and live a life worth living.

happy pride month everybody. love you all so much, NEVER stop being you.

okay so i know that like

a bunch of yall are Nebraska folks.

now, with that in mind, how about this:

i turn 18 at the end of june, so what if i were to take a road trip in like mid-july, and come up and visit yall? thoughts?

wanna see more random crap from me?

follow my whatsapp channel

https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VafgvfEIt5rtaRDcNn0V

okay chat so like

i graduated high school

thirteen long years, same campus, i’ve watched it grow so much over that time. been one hell of a ride, you guys.

but i did it. im free now.

seons are just

Floating Butler Balls

ladies and gentlemen

today my mission papers were officially submitted.

the wait begins.

last night i went to the Austin stop on AJRs The Maybe Man Tour. Floor seats. Great view, great sound, i cried three times.

Shared the evening with my beloved @Crowstavern, and i was screaming all the words. it was a night to remember, i’ll never forget it. the whole show was a work of art.

i wish i was me, whoever that is.

i could just be, and not give a sh*t

hey, ill be whatever makes you a fan

cause i dont know who the hell i am

i think its too late to figure this out

if i could be me i would’ve been it by now

maybe im a stone

or big as my house

it looks like our time is running out

so if this is me, then ill do my best

ill take all the sh*t, so you never have to

you can be you

and i’ll be the rest

yeah, maybe that’s who the hell i am

happy to report i’ve successfully defeated Tears of the Kingdom

defeated the Demon King

all three stages 

one try

week long grind for this

there is pain

and there is sorrow

but nothing compares

to watching the light leave somebody’s eyes

when they say,

”you know,

i don’t think i ever loved you.”

there is pain behind that.

because not even a month ago you said to them,

”look into my eyes,

see my pain. my sins. my horrors.

look there, into my eyes,

and love me.”

and they said,

”i will.”

and now

they see you with contempt

with hatred 

with regret and animosity

and they just want you gone.

song idea maybe????:

bay blue

baby blue

sky blue eyes

my girl, my love

with eyes like stars,

could never tell me lies

BEGIN LOG

If love is so fragile, then why continue to repair it after it cracks?

Once it has filled its surface with this many cracks, wouldn’t it be easier to leave it be and let it decay and shatter and fall apart over time?

Yes. It would be easier.

But that doesn’t mean it’s the correct thing to do.

Love is so fragile because it needs to be constantly repaired. It is an essential part of love, that need for constant repair, for maintenance, for reassurance of devotion.

Some may wonder why to keep that lamp on, to keep its ornate ceramic looking beautiful, despite the cracks.

“Look at your lamp,” They say, “It is cracked and flawed. Shouldn’t you discard it and put a new flawless copy in its place?”

And I say to them, “You know nothing of this. This lamp has seen much. Endured much. It’s stories are nestled in the cracks spreading across its ceramic. It’s journey is weaved into the stone it is made of as if a testament of all it has seen and heard. Is this not a sign of flawless and perfect existence? Perfection in imperfection?”

This lamp, this love..

It will dim. It will brighten. Sometimes the power will blink out, leaving us in the dark.

But the lights will come back on. And we will fight to love. We will choose to love, and to live, and we will nurture the cracks. Let them settle. And when someone asks about them, we will tell that story.

I will engrave bluebirds into our lamp. I will stamp ravens to the surface, let crows flutter onto the stone. I will put roses, and chrysanthemums, and moonflowers and sunflowers, and I will sprinkle it in color so that when it is finished, it will be colorful in ways you only could have dreamed of.

I have made mistakes. I have cracked our lamp. I will mend the crack. I will transform it into something beautiful. I will build on it, and build into a future with you. 

This is my vow to you.

straight chilling 

metro boomin

across the spider verse album 

oooooo bangers all around

update:

taking the day off school

slept in a bit more

doing much better

gonna eat a good meal, then get some work done

chat what do i do if it’s all becoming Too Much?

if im dissociating and the world just feels Off

like why is everything just Agh

like why do i want to go to sleep and never Wake Up Again

like bro

everything is just No right now