Lord Pifferdoo

Doc Piffington could hear sounds of conflict outside. He really had to pee, so he hoped that whoever was fighting was A: Here for the Doc and B: Not here to kill him. Doc Piffington whistled an old military tune his grandfather had once sung to him.

Can somebody please rescue Doc Piffington from Damnation? It's boring.

Well Doc Piffington needs to figure out where the frick he is right now Maybe he could pray to Cultivation

Can Doc Piffington join?

Doc Piffington eyes shot open. He was in a room he had never seen before. The walls were stark white, and the ceiling...glowed? Or parts of it did, illuminating the room with an artificial sunshine. He was on a tile floor, still dressed in his dirty lab coat and duster. His pistol, syringe, meat hammer, and Rioter vials were on a table close to a large, grey door. His boot-knife and emergency scalpel were still tucked away in their secret places, and a half-finished plague mask was on the floor nearby. His outlaw hat was on the other side of the room for some reason, along with his dark goggles and an outstanding large pile of confetti. Doc Piffington stood up and immediately regretted that decision. Every muscle and bone in his body screamed in agony, and he was so thirsty, his throat felt like it was on fire. He looked around the room for any fluids to drink, and then remembered his emergency alcohol stash. Doc Piffington reached into his lab coat and pulled out a flask filled with Twinborn Village Whiskey. (It's So Good, It's Killer!) He sniffed the leather-bound flask and took a long draw, rejoicing at the burning sensation. Doc Piffington felt a wet spot begin to form on his neck and down to his shirt. He look down, and saw the wet spot growing even larger. Just then, the Doc felt a sharp pain in his neck, and on impulse clutched his left hand to the spot. He then gasped, only it came out like a low growl. A bullethole passed through his Leras's Apple, into his trachea and out the posterior side.

Yea...about that updated map...

Because logic. That's how.

Woohoo! Another one bites the dust! And by dust I mean the air around him as it combusted!

Yea, is this still a thing?

The deal is done! And sometimes people just protect me, for no reason whatsoever. So thank you Emerald, for your kind words that were actually accusatory towards someone else.

I'm going to vote for Winter, for the sole reason that she was evil in the LG. That's right, I'm going Meta on this one. Not you, Meta. Not yet. By the way Haelbarde, if you don't vote for me, I'll make you a stethoscope that is coated in a deadly poison!

Ah. Good point.

If the Spiked spike someone powerful, what's to stop that person from just telling everyone else who all the Spiked are and then either sacrifice themselves or get a Lurcher to pull it out? The Lurcher would have to die, unless you managed to manipulate a Spiked Lurcher by getting him in a room with the Lambchop and then Nicrobursting him secretly? And then whomever has Hazecrusher would smack the crap out of him. 'Course, that plan falls apart if the Spiked have Hazecrusher on their hands. But I don't think they do, because they would have used it last night and we would have a dead ostrich on our hands.

I told a freshman today to go to the pit. The look on their face was priceless

Well the people of Scadrial were created by Ruin and Preservation, so it would make sense that there's some genetic manipulation on their part. But I believe there's a WoB somewhere that states that at least some (if not all) of the humans that first showed up on Roshar emigrated from somewhere else, possibly Yolen. If that is the case, perhaps the Shards modified them slightly to make them more suited to their respective Investitures. (Self-plug: Which strengthens my theory about Burning Eyeballs)

Doctors Without Boundaries Or maybe The Doctors' Whom

Doc Piffington will have the embroidered lab coats ready shortly. Anybody want pocket protectors/hypodermic needle sheaths/overly white gloves/victorian plague mask?

Can our outlaw gang name be "Malpractice"?

I live in Minnesota

Parshendi Gods = Unmade? Possibly?

Can we all take a moment to appreciate the tags? (clapping) Bravo.

What have I done?