The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[xinoehp512 he/him]

But his depression was only a river to a vast ocean.

[+Doomstick he/him]

of cheese

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

fondue

[xinoehp512 he/him]

despair.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Stick was a stick.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

A bored stick.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

He wanted to do something. Preferably something that did not involve becoming fire.

[+Doomstick he/him]

So he grew a leaf

[NameIess]

But then Lift ate it.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Suddenly, Hoid

[NameIess]

rhymed eloquently with stupid.

[+Doomstick he/him]

it was quite strange

[AonEne he/him]

and the poetry gods got sorta miffed at him for it. 

[xinoehp512 he/him]

They smote him with an orange.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

And with a lemon.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

And a grape.

[+Doomstick he/him]

And a passionfruit

[NameIess]

And floods of blood.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Rutabaga.

[AonEne he/him]

In the end he'd been smitten with a lot of things, including love. 

[+Doomstick he/him]

LOVE was an experimental weapon being developed by the Ghanderflaffle Empire

[AonEne he/him]

It was an acronym for Level of Violence. 

[Chasmgoat he/him]

They added an E to the acronym since Lov was a forbidden word.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

It was a protected keyword in CABLE.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Wasing not of wasing is.