The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

Then a Chipmunk exploded.

[Snipexe he/him]

“A suit!” Bob cried! “I haven’t made a mere suit in years! For I’m no ordinary tailor, no, no, I’m a specialist in one thing.” “And what’s that...?” RAdolin asked. “Bunny suits.” Bob responded. 1 hour later, RAdolin left in a pristine new suit, and left a very rich tailor in his wake. And a burning tailor shop.

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

And a blown up hedgehog.

[recneps he/him]

Unfortunately, the plague of rabies did not end here. All of the exploding animals had been infected by Adolin. The fire of the tailor shop caused all sorts of people to gather round. Several noticed the remains of the animals, and were infected due to very little natural immunity.

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

And then they all exploded.

[BitBitio he/him]

5 hours ago, DarthWoodrack said:

Then a squirrel exploded.

 

5 hours ago, DarthWoodrack said:

Then a Chipmunk exploded.

 

4 hours ago, DarthWoodrack said:

And a blown up hedgehog.

 

4 hours ago, DarthWoodrack said:

And then they all exploded.

"I have failed. They will all explode. I have failed. Oh Almighty... Forgive me, I have failed!"

"Do you mind, Woodrack? I'm reading Oathbringer. Quiet down already!"

 

Spoiler

 

[whattheHoid she/her]

It started to rain again and with it came droplets of aluminum, which counteracted the rabies coursing through RAdolin and everyone else who became infected. Through the rain, RAdolin becamea an Aluminum Gnat and therefore immune to rabies and all other dog diseases. RAdolin was so happy he went back to pet and got licked by many puppies. Bob and all these exploding woodland creatures looked on in amazement. 

Edited August 3, 2018 by whattheHoid

[Gancho Libre he/him]

Then they looked in shock. Then Joy. Then sadness. Then...

[Sherlock Holmes he/him]

...Surprise. The puppies shook their heads and confined all the silly humans back to their cages, where they could play with their toys and stop bothering the puppies for a short while. 

[Rebecca she/her]

The humans didn’t much enjoy being stuffed into cages. So they began to concoct a plan.

[AonEne he/him]

This plan involved loving the puppies and submitting to them forever.

[recneps he/him]

Indeed. The humans tricked the puppies: their great show of devotion convinced the puppies that they were merely humble slaves. But lo! They were not. The humans, in the middle of the night, stole away and escaped. Unfortunately, they were still infected with rabies. As their spaceship blasted off from Dogsmar, they began to die. The spaceship crashed.

Edited August 3, 2018 by recneps

[AonEne he/him]

Then they all died, and all human life was exterminated. Except for a few of our protagonists, of course.

That's what you get when you defy the puppies.

[whattheHoid she/her]

The little group of humans that survived stayed far away from puppies. Luckily, Butt made a Fart perimeter protecting everyone from anything. They passed down legends of terrific, monstrous beings, known as dogs. The puppies on Dogsmar were sad because they were cute and cuddly and missed being scratched on the head. They also regretted their decision to infect and exterminate the humans. 

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

Then the stuff exploded.

[BitBitio he/him]

And so, the puppies began stealing each other's souls. Soon, one puppy rose dominant.

 

 

Ponko.

[recneps he/him]

Ponko, as it turned out, is a misspelling.

PaanKo is the real name of the kandra who takes the form of the Alpha Dog.

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

And then more stuff exploded.

[Kidpen he/him]

Namely, the beta dog named....

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

Creeper. Why they exploded was mildly obvious,

[recneps he/him]

PaanKo, blaming the explosions on acts of radical human terrorism, orders the construction of a fleet of massive ships for the sake of a great crusade across the stars to eliminate all humans.

[whattheHoid she/her]

Butt gathered the humans and Shards and had a meeting. They decided to send TenSoon as a liason, to meet with this mysterious PaanKo in an attempt to ameliorate the situation.

[Gancho Libre he/him]

However, Butt didn't understand the meaning of the word 'ameliorate', so there was a gigantic mix-up. He also ate a churro, but that's unrelevant.

[Stormblessed Dolphin he/him]

One of the narrators looked at Gancho Libre's post and thought only one thing...

 

Irrelevant*

GET IT RIGHT YOU FOOL

And so began a war between narrators that would shatter the 4th wall

[+ElephantEarwax he/him]

And all of the other walls.