Having a Bad Day?: Get 'yer Hugs here!!

[Queen Elsa Steelheart she/her]

21 hours ago, Silverblade5 said:

@Queen Elsa Steelheart

That sounds real rough. I can only imagine.

*Sends hugs with noise cancelling headphones that have a bluetooth podcast system*

I don't know what I'm more thankful for, the noise canceling headphones or hugs. 

8 hours ago, Sorana said:

@Queen Elsa Steelheart

*hugs*
I'm really sorry to hear that, and I hope you will get better soon and can get back to your life! You can do it!

Thank you! *hugs*

[+Slowswift]

On 2/15/2019 at 6:44 AM, Queen Elsa Steelheart said:

Okay so rant time.

I've been in hospital for a week and it's literally been awful. Most of the staff have been lovely, but being in hospital so young sucks. I'm 19. Last week I was in a four bed room, and then another four bed room, now I'm in a single. Being in the second four bed room with 3 elderly ladies until I got a single room was awful. One lady was nice but the other one was awful. 

She:

-got confused and took my phone while I was in the bathroom and my cousin stopped her.

-went to my food tray and almost touched my lunch (I got very nervous because I don't know what's on her hands)

-kept coming into my part of the bed cubicle when I was hinting 'I'm sick GO AWAY' (THE CURTAIN WAS DRAWN!!!) and was seconds from buzzing the nurse to tell the patient to go away. 

 

At least this week I have a bit more energy and I'm not as weak and not throwing up as much, not everyday. I'm so stressed and I've been having trouble walking. The doctors know this but I want my life back. I miss my job, I miss my best friend, I miss my karate lessons!! I miss my own bed! 

 

And as of now, 11pm, a man is yelling down the hall. shut. up. 

*mails hugbot to Australia*

*at least, I think it's Australia...*

*attaches homing beacon and jetpack to hugbot and chucks it off cliff*

Best of luck in your recovery!  

Edited February 18, 2019 by Slowswift

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her]

On 2/15/2019 at 6:44 AM, Queen Elsa Steelheart said:

Okay so rant time.

I've been in hospital for a week and it's literally been awful. Most of the staff have been lovely, but being in hospital so young sucks. I'm 19. Last week I was in a four bed room, and then another four bed room, now I'm in a single. Being in the second four bed room with 3 elderly ladies until I got a single room was awful. One lady was nice but the other one was awful. 

She:

-got confused and took my phone while I was in the bathroom and my cousin stopped her.

-went to my food tray and almost touched my lunch (I got very nervous because I don't know what's on her hands)

-kept coming into my part of the bed cubicle when I was hinting 'I'm sick GO AWAY' (THE CURTAIN WAS DRAWN!!!) and was seconds from buzzing the nurse to tell the patient to go away. 

 

At least this week I have a bit more energy and I'm not as weak and not throwing up as much, not everyday. I'm so stressed and I've been having trouble walking. The doctors know this but I want my life back. I miss my job, I miss my best friend, I miss my karate lessons!! I miss my own bed! 

 

And as of now, 11pm, a man is yelling down the hall. shut. up. 

This won't last forever. I don't know how long it'll take, but sooner or later you'll be discharged, and you'll get to go back to your job, your friends, your karate lessons, and your own bed. This is just something you have to get through. It'll suck in the meantime, but it's not permanent. 

In the meantime, have a pug hug. 

Spoiler

 

[SandersonFanderson she/her]

On ‎2‎/‎15‎/‎2019 at 6:44 AM, Queen Elsa Steelheart said:

Okay so rant time.

I've been in hospital for a week and it's literally been awful. Most of the staff have been lovely, but being in hospital so young sucks. I'm 19. Last week I was in a four bed room, and then another four bed room, now I'm in a single. Being in the second four bed room with 3 elderly ladies until I got a single room was awful. One lady was nice but the other one was awful. 

She:

-got confused and took my phone while I was in the bathroom and my cousin stopped her.

-went to my food tray and almost touched my lunch (I got very nervous because I don't know what's on her hands)

-kept coming into my part of the bed cubicle when I was hinting 'I'm sick GO AWAY' (THE CURTAIN WAS DRAWN!!!) and was seconds from buzzing the nurse to tell the patient to go away. 

 

At least this week I have a bit more energy and I'm not as weak and not throwing up as much, not everyday. I'm so stressed and I've been having trouble walking. The doctors know this but I want my life back. I miss my job, I miss my best friend, I miss my karate lessons!! I miss my own bed! 

 

And as of now, 11pm, a man is yelling down the hall. shut. up. 

I relate to you, I was put in the hospital about a year and a half ago at age 15, it was awful. I couldn't eat because my body rejected basically any food and I ended up with a feeding tube for a while. I was literally starving to death until that point and being in the hospital was so awful, you feel like the world is passing by you and you can't do anything to catch up with it. I hope you get better soon. *Hugs*

[Silva]

I left my notes for a class at school for over the weekend.

I have a test in that class on Thursday.

School for tomorrow was cancelled.

I have none of my handwritten notes to study from.

(Yes, the teacher does upload class notes online, so I'm not completely dead, but it's a pain to access)

[Nathrangking he/him]

18 minutes ago, Silva said:

I left my notes for a class at school for over the weekend.

I have a test in that class on Thursday.

School for tomorrow was cancelled.

I have none of my handwritten notes to study from.

(Yes, the teacher does upload class notes online, so I'm not completely dead, but it's a pain to access)

Oy vey. *Hugs* hang in there!!

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her]

Me: I'm going to finish writing this book and it'll be awesome! 

My brain: Yeah, whatever. No one is going to read it. 

Me: 

My brain: So what's the point in finishing it? 

Me: 

My brain: 

Me: None. None at all. 

[Queen Elsa Steelheart she/her]

On 18/02/2019 at 3:18 PM, Slowswift said:

*mails hugbot to Australia*

*at least, I think it's Australia...*

*attaches homing beacon and jetpack to hugbot and chucks it off cliff*

Best of luck in your recovery!  

Thank you! I appreciate the support. 

22 hours ago, SandersonFanderson said:

I relate to you, I was put in the hospital about a year and a half ago at age 15, it was awful. I couldn't eat because my body rejected basically any food and I ended up with a feeding tube for a while. I was literally starving to death until that point and being in the hospital was so awful, you feel like the world is passing by you and you can't do anything to catch up with it. I hope you get better soon. *Hugs*

I threw up six times. I felt awful and totally sympathise with you. I was on a clear fluid diet for a bit and that was literally was a popsicle, vegetable broth and apple juice. I am never having vegetable broth ever again. All I wanted was scrambled eggs and I was starving too.

 

The good news is that today after 13 days in hospital, I was discharged! I am finally back in real life and not just the hospital walls. I'm freeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Still taking it easy even though its very very exciting!

 

Edited February 20, 2019 by Queen Elsa Steelheart

[SandersonFanderson she/her]

2 hours ago, Queen Elsa Steelheart said:

 

The good news is that today after 13 days in hospital, I was discharged! I am finally back in real life and not just the hospital walls. I'm freeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Still taking it easy even though its very very exciting!

 

Glad to hear you're doing better!!

[Queen Elsa Steelheart she/her]

2 minutes ago, SandersonFanderson said:

Glad to hear you're doing better!!

Very glad to be out!

[Kobold King he/him]

16 hours ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said:

Me: I'm going to finish writing this book and it'll be awesome! 

My brain: Yeah, whatever. No one is going to read it. 

Me: 

My brain: So what's the point in finishing it? 

Me: 

My brain: 

Me: None. None at all. 

 

Don't listen to it! Your brain is wrong and stupid!

...

...you know... within the context of this fictional conversation? Hmm, that didn't come out quite right. This is why I stopped posting encouragement here.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her]

26 minutes ago, Kobold King said:

 

Don't listen to it! Your brain is wrong and stupid!

...

...you know... within the context of this fictional conversation? Hmm, that didn't come out quite right. This is why I stopped posting encouragement here.

Haha, thanks.  It's just like…I don't know. I believe in my story, but that's no guarantee. Edgar Allen Poe believed in his work, and nobody even read it until after he was dead. Sometimes I'm just convinced that's what's going to happen to me—that I'll pour my heart into this story and no one will read it. Or worse—someone will read it, plagiarize it with just enough differences to foil the lawyers, and they'll become famous and make all the money and be the one whose work people write fanfic for. Like I'll do all of that work and still be ignored. 

[Kobold King he/him]

16 minutes ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said:

Haha, thanks.  It's just like…I don't know. I believe in my story, but that's no guarantee. Edgar Allen Poe believed in his work, and nobody even read it until after he was dead. Sometimes I'm just convinced that's what's going to happen to me—that I'll pour my heart into this story and no one will read it. Or worse—someone will read it, plagiarize it with just enough differences to foil the lawyers, and they'll become famous and make all the money and be the one whose work people write fanfic for. Like I'll do all of that work and still be ignored. 

 

Effort and reward, sadly, are not always companions. All too often our own struggles go unnoticed while those we feel are undeserving reap all the reward in the world.

But I don't think that makes our own efforts irrelevant. There's a small but incredible feeling that goes along solely with the feeling of having created something good.

I know that's easier said than felt. I spend way more time than I should refreshing my statistics page on AO3 to see if I've gotten any new kudos, which are basically the tiny shards of validation that I need to get me through the month. That's not healthy, and I'm speaking as someone who's usually teetering on the verge of depression and a self-destructive emotional meltdown. But I think that gives me the ability to recognize the power inherent in simply believing what you made is good and feeling proud of it. There are a few times I've posted something and genuinely not cared if anyone else liked it; as rare as those fleeting moments are, as quickly as they fade away, they stick out in my head as the moments when I was truly invincible. In those moments I felt fulfilled, fully content with my creations and the time that went into them.

I guess what I'm saying is that, although it's incredibly difficult to earnestly see it that way, it's okay if only one person is glad you put the time into creating something. And it's okay if that person is yourself.

 

Spoiler

Not that this is the case for you, because I want to read your fantasy story.

Spoiler

Also, while writing this, I realized that I stopped writing a Doki Doki Literature Club! one-shot because I was discouraged by the feeling that it was all old ground for anyone who spent time reading DDLC fanfics, and that no one would care about its existence but me.

But I was enjoying writing it, and I'd be happier right now if I were looking back not on an unfinished word document but on a finished work, even if it were sitting at an unchanging 0 views and 0 kudos on Archive Of Our Own. So I think it's about time I started typing again.

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

T̩̠͎h̳̱̼̥͔̝ͅa̲̳͙̬ͅt͎͍'̮s̩̱̬̱ ̖̝͖̻̥ͅri̜͓̬̻̙̤̪g͍̘̯̩̖h̦͍͈͓t̩̳͎,̣̩̳̜̲̦̪ ̗̟̦͎̻̺K͔o͙̲b̳o̰͍̣̥͉̜l̟̠̯̥̩ͅͅd̹̣͉͖. ̜͓̪̟͙F̥̦i̻̖̱̺͈̪n̻i̭̟s̩̯̺͔̖̘͈ẖ͉̼̹͔̼ ̺t͉̪̝͖̬͖̪he̜ ͚̮̣s͓̗̘͎̱̠ṯ̮͙̙̖̲o̗̦̮̻r̝̯̲͉y͖͕̲̰͚.̜͕͇ ̞W͇͈e̥̗̖̝̤̺̝'͓͈̜̠͖͚v̖͇͇e̯ ͇̻̦ͅb̖͇͖̰̖̞̥eeṉ̟̥̦̗̪ ̠̤͚w͕̞a̹̥̹i͚̗̝̙̻ͅt̰̠i͍̭͎̮ng̟̣̙.̠̖ ͎̙̰̰̝̝:̠̱̞ͅ ̫̘͖̘̱͔)͕͙͈

 

 

 

 

 

[Djarskublar he/him]

I really need some hugs right now. I just had a really nasty fight with my father and I just need someone to be sincerely nice to me. Please and thank you for anything genuine. I love you guys.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Oh no. Fights are no good. Words can really sting, especially when they're from someone who knows and loves you. *hug* It'll get better. 

[AonEne he/him]

Argh, I hate fighting with parents. *hugs you*

[Silverblade5 he/him]

Rust and Ruin! Storming wifi has been out for a week now and I have a presentation due tomorrow.

[Nathrangking he/him]

Found out today that the competative masters program  I applied to did not accept me. I'm back to square one without a real plan and frustrated as all hell.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her]

23 minutes ago, Nathrangking said:

Found out today that the competative masters program  I applied to did not accept me. I'm back to square one without a real plan and frustrated as all hell.

I'm so sorry.  Even if there's another Master's program you can apply to (and, not knowing your situation, I don't know if there is or not) getting rejected sucks. 

Is there anything else you really wanted to do? 

[Nathrangking he/him]

On 2/27/2019 at 9:59 PM, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said:

I'm so sorry.  Even if there's another Master's program you can apply to (and, not knowing your situation, I don't know if there is or not) getting rejected sucks. 

Is there anything else you really wanted to do? 

That's the difficulty of it. I was dismissed by the law school I had been attending in the middle of  January. This was shot #2. It really took the air out of me. I am not used to failure yet I have now been majorly set back twice in as many months. It causes doubts to creep into my mind add this to an undergrad professor who I recently spoke to told me that a paper that he gave me an A on did not really deserve it. He said that it was really a B paper that got an A not on content, but on the eloquence of the phraseology. I used to take pride in the paper now I'm not so sure.

Edited March 1, 2019 by Nathrangking

[+ZincAboutIt she/her]

My anxiety has gotten so bad that doing something as simple as posting a comment on this forum fills me with terror. I know I should get help, but I don't want to hear just how broken I am. I feel like I am too old to be so anxious about everything, and admitting it would be humiliating. 

[Just a Lifetime he/him]

@ZincAboutIt I don't know whether this might be useful, if you haven't read it already.

[+ZincAboutIt she/her]

53 minutes ago, Just a Lifetime said:

@ZincAboutIt I don't know whether this might be useful, if you haven't read it already.

What a lovely article, thank you! 

[+Sorana she/her]

12 hours ago, ZincAboutIt said:

My anxiety has gotten so bad that doing something as simple as posting a comment on this forum fills me with terror. I know I should get help, but I don't want to hear just how broken I am. I feel like I am too old to be so anxious about everything, and admitting it would be humiliating. 

*hugs*

I know that situation only too well. But believe me, you are never too old for something like this. It took me so long to even admit it to myself, that maybe I had a problem, that maybe, I might need help, I was so afraid, so ashamed, felt so helpless, so unworthy...

I can only offer to listen, should you need someone, in a private pm, on discord or wherever you prefer. Otherwise I'll gladly offer a hug whenever you need it.

[AonEne he/him]

22 hours ago, ZincAboutIt said:

My anxiety has gotten so bad that doing something as simple as posting a comment on this forum fills me with terror. I know I should get help, but I don't want to hear just how broken I am. I feel like I am too old to be so anxious about everything, and admitting it would be humiliating. 

*hugs tightly* I'm also here for listening, or anything that might help. I haven't known you long, but I like you, Zinc. There's no possible way to humiliate yourself on here by saying you have anxiety, because the people who know you know that you're amazing. Lots of people suffer from this. You're not alone and never will be, IRL or on here.