the most useless uses for useful powers

[Shaggai]

There's a bond between the bearer and the Shardblade. You can.

 

Well following by everyone's example... Not so much useless as mundane uses....

 

Using Feruchemical iron to control the height of a hot air balloon.

When everyone uses a rope with their climbing gear as they climb a sheer cliff, you just Iron Pull yourself on the metal... uh... there's a technical word for those metal line securing thingoes.

Storing connection when you don't want to be noticed, tapping it when you're in the mood for socialising

Using a shard blade instead of a pocket knife

Burn Atium while playing tic tac toe (and watch in amazement as multiple Atium shadows unfold)

Go ice skating on any surface using the Friction Surge

Pretend you're Jesus with the Friction Surge

Impersonate many superheroes with Gravity Surge

Bundle yourself in the thickest clothes you can find, then wear them everywhere while storing brass till you are constantly at the right temperature

Store speed while at your desk job, then run home.

Breathe pure oxygen to fill your cadmium minds easier, then use them for whatever deep sea diving exploration you have planned.

Use life sense to always know where everyone is

Use bronze minds to always force yourself to conform to a proper sleep pattern. Good bye jet lag!

Store tin when avoiding a particular smell, taste, or any sensation. Tap later when confronted with a pleasurable one. 

Store up pewter to properly cosplay the Hulk transformation <-- I'm proud of this one

Burn bend alloy to do some really funky costume changes power rangers style

Beat the top nerd with copper compounding. Use Feruchemical zinc if they're actually smart

 

 

 

Some more awesome uses for powers:

Using spanreeds for FTL communication and break special relativity. Extension of this is replace your modem with a few conjoined rubies to the main server till you have internet with literally no lag or loading time. 

Get a tattoo of a stamp or an Aon for instantaneous power awesomeness

 

 

 

I just realised that this probably doesn't count as useless at all   oh well!

I doubt spanreeds are FTL.

[king of nowhere]

store age in an atium metalmind. swallow that metalmind. then burn duraluminium, or get a nicroburst.

You just reverted to an embryo, thereby committing the most spectacular suicide ever.

[Curiosity he/him]

Burn pewter to fall down staircases without breaking bones. 

 

Steal the ability to take naps at will from my cat using Hemalurgy.

Edited May 7, 2014 by Curiosity

[Aether he/him]

Learn to Forge, only to Forge yourself to forget that you're a Forger.

 

Oh, wait, Shai already (almost) did that.

[Tempus]

Practicing Aluminium Misting Savant.

[MistLord he/him]

I doubt spanreeds are FTL.

The explanation fro spanreeds are that they're bonded - joined in a particular way. The duality is too similar to quantum entanglement for it to be a coincidence. I think the effect is instantaneous = FTL.

[Observer]

Using carefully and expensively grafted throat muscles, choke yourself do death by tapping Feruchemical Pewter. Alternatively, forge yourself to view the tongue as a muscle that can always get bigger before doing so.

[Pathfinder]

Get an apartment with a high vaulted ceiling. Have your living room on the floor, and your bed room on the ceiling. Saves space   (as a windrunner)

Edited May 1, 2014 by P4thf1nd3r

[Khmauv he/him]

Tap Feruchemical zinc to come up with a clever response to the thread about useless uses of useful powers.

[Observer]

It's more wasteful if you use Bendalloy.

 

*Most certainly did not waste money to find that out why would you think something like that I mean seriously*

[Shaggai]

The explanation fro spanreeds are that they're bonded - joined in a particular way. The duality is too similar to quantum entanglement for it to be a coincidence. I think the effect is instantaneous = FTL.

 

Except that isn't how quantum entanglement works. Quantum entanglement, by its inherent nature, cannot transmit information. It's determined completely randomly. Spanreeds seem more like radios, or some similar thing.

[Swimmingly he/him]

Considering that magic things such as Worldhoppers already have something that is technically FTL, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that FTL transfer of information is only a problem when the information only passes through the Physical.

[Observer]

Brandon has said that the laws of physics still more or less apply in the cognitive at least, though the interactions between the two can almost certainly break them, even if the realms on their own cannot.

[Shaggai]

Brandon has said that the laws of physics still more or less apply in the cognitive at least, though the interactions between the two can almost certainly break them, even if the realms on their own cannot.

Exactly. It's a Cognitive radio.

[Fifth of Daybreak he/him]

Go Steelpushing over people's houses at night, then making all the door handles rattle and using zinc and brass to make them afraid. Awakening the curtains to catch and smother them, one by one.

Then laugh, because you've turned the Cosmere into a horror movie.

I think this qualifies for the "People to Avoid in Dark Alleys" list.

Store sight while at the Optometrist.

Forge a book into a language you can't read.

Have a Kandra impersonate a mistwraith.

Store luck at the casino.

Have Kandra ingest famous people to be displayed in permanent wax museums.

Awaken a Furby with the command "Annoy."

Forge everything into a stick.

Flare pewter when holding delicate china.

Soothe an audience to be bored at a performance.

Edited May 2, 2014 by EMTrevor

[Baine he/him]

Furbies are already Awakened with the command "Terrify."

[Kobold King he/him]

Use Hemalurgy to steal calories from someone because you're hungry and can't find anything tasty to eat.

[Lightsworn Panda he/him]

Awaken Chocolate Easter Bunnies to make Easter Bunny real.

 

Soulcast cheese into butter for no reason.

 

Forge and Soulcast yourself into a panda.

[Observer]

Just give your Breath back to Nalthis without ever using it.

[Khmauv he/him]

Awaken a Furby with the command "Annoy."

 

WINNER! for redundancy.

[happyman he/him]

Awaken a Furby with the command "Annoy."

 

How would you tell if it was working?

[Kobold King he/him]

How would you tell if it was working?

 

Awaken another toy with the Command "Be annoyed", and if commits suicide within moments of creation, then it's working.

[Fifth of Daybreak he/him]

How would you tell if it was working?

You try to take the batteries out and it starts cackling madly.

[ZeldaDad he/him]

Use Abrasion to slip on those slightly-too-tight pants

Use a Steel Push to propel you from your chair to avoid standing

Use an Iron Pull to lift your own arm by a watch or other metal band to scratch an itch.

Visit the Nightwatcher and ask for a sandwich (not really a power but meh)

Edited May 4, 2014 by Endra kin'Fox

[Kasimir he/him]

Use a Lashing to turn the pages of your book rather than do it yourself.