Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, you get branded a tyrant.

I wish for unlimited wishes.

[Odiumiumium he/him]

Granted. Now you will never find the thing you are looking for, and it only appears once you no longer need it. 

I wish for a coconut hat.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, you lose all your brains to the psychotic worm living in the coconut, I hope you're happy.

I wish for a good shirt.

[Potato's Wit she/her]

Granted, you are stalked by an atom named Adam for the rest of your life, and you don't even know what type of atom he is!

 I wish for a smoothilee. (No, that's not a spelling mistake.)

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, your grammar is now always off.

I wish for a bowl of potato chips with a never ending thing of blue moose jalapeño dip.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

Granted. you forever have horrible problems with being flatulent.

We wish for completed final projects.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, you can't write anything after finishing two projects.

I wish for a ham sandwich.

[Immortal Platypus]

Granted. You always crave a turkey sandwich but can never get one.

I wish for an Honorblade.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, if you ever summon it you suddenly have loud flatulence.

I wish for the ability to end world hunger.

[Potato's Wit she/her]

Granted. The world ends. 

I wish for a kitty cat.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, its name is Hitler.

I wish for the wishes to end.

[Immortal Platypus]

Not Granted.

I wish for that wish to never be repeated.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

Granted. You now will forever be unable to find the perfect PFP.

I wish for fish.

[Telrao she/her]

Granted. You now can breathe only under water.

I wish to be able to swim!

[Immortal Platypus]

Granted. All water is either too hot or too cold to swim in for you.

I wish for all types of Investiture

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Granted! Every human on the face of this Earth receives this boon as well, so you no longer feel special. Oh, and society collapses due to all this power.

I wish for the mental ability to develop a cheap, clean, and renewable energy source  so that I may sell the produced energy to every major power grid controller in the world for slightly less than fossil fuels, making. everyone leave oil and gas behind in favor of my alternative, effectively making mevthe richest and kost powerful person to ever live. 

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, your money disappears randomly. sent to a mysterious person known as Hoid...

I wish for infinite pumpkin pie.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

Granted. you loose the sense of being full, and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and you are now fat and have to roll everywhere.

I wish for acceptance.

[Potato's Wit she/her]

Granted. There is no one around to accept you. You live the rest of your life in loneliness...

I wish for ninja stars.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

Granted. Your hands are paralyzed.

I wish for a good MTG deck.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, you now smell like fungus.

I wish for no bane.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Granted, though I don’t

see why you’d want such a thing.

I wish for music.

[Immortal Platypus]

Granted. It is horrible music that you hate and can't get rid of.

I wish to be Hoid.

[Throw TheLiving Silverware he/him/il/lui]

Granted, your ID card now has Hoid Platypus written on it instead of your real name. Also, you don't have elbows anymore.

I wish to be able to talk to other people more easily.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Granted, you can't think, aka talk to yourself.

I wish for a bowl of spicy chips.