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Posted
5 hours ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Granted, but now Vapor is annoyed.

I wish to become a master of words and speech.

I don't mind if Vapor is annoyed.

I wish that The Longest Thread will only be active when I am able to post.

Posted

Granted, it's done. It's done being evaluated by your teachers. You failed on all of them. 

I wish to be always clean regardless if I bathe or not. 

Posted
1 minute ago, Shard of Reading said:

I wish for a shardblade (Not nightblood)

(WoR spoilers)

Spoiler

Granted. You get Syl in the form of a shardblade. No, Syl is not upset with you for bonding her. Yes, Kaladin was flying when Syl's bond was ripped away from him.

I wish to be absolutely awesome at Hollow Knight.

Posted
6 minutes ago, revelryintheart said:

Granted. You're locked in the Pantheon and all the bindings are in effect.

I've got no idea what that means, but Awesome!

Posted (edited)
4 hours ago, revelryintheart said:

Granted. You're locked in the Pantheon and all the bindings are in effect.

I wish to finish the Delicate Flower quest.

Granted. Your bane is that you spent way too much time on it and it is now 2022, you have been off of the Shard since today.

I wish that I could eat a bunch of delicious cookies.

Flame on!

Edited by Condensation
Posted
On 9/5/2020 at 3:18 PM, Condensation said:

I wish that I could eat a bunch of delicious cookies.

Looking over at Cultivation who nods her head in approval the Nightwatcher says, "Sure thing boss, I'll T this one up."

"On certain days you have the capacity to eat a copious quantity of cookies, but alas no desire to do so. On other days you lack the capacity but are filled with the desire to eat cookies, lets say on those days your teeth are soft and squishy like fruit snacks. So technically you could eat a bunch of cookies, but it's just not in the cards for you to actually get to eat them."

"I appreciate ya coming all the way out here though, I really do,  so as a consolation prize you get this snappy t-shirt".

You look down at the lime green t-shirt you are now wearing and see that it says in dark forest green Cooper Black letters "I've Boon to the Valley. It could have Bane worse."

20200907_223820.jpg.c13d878004fef515dad94b6d6aacc383.jpg

I wish Billy Joel was my guardian angel.

Spoiler

 

 

Posted
10 minutes ago, Eluvianii said:

I wish I could swim on the ground.

Granted. Using run of the mill swimming techniques you can very slowly and painfully make forward progress while laying on your stomach and "swimming" on the ground. Anyone could do this really, but the Nightwatcher has given you an edge, you've been given the tenacity of Michael Phelps, and the sweet mustache of Mark "the shark" Spitz (sorry about this if your a girl).

Your bane is that you become the world's most famous ground swimming tic tok star.

I wish for a magic chamois.

Posted

Granted. In exactly one year, the nearest tree weighing a thousand pounds or above will fall on your head. There is no way to avoid this. Even if you're in Antarctica, it will somehow travel all the way to your head.

I wish to know the exact nature of this rivalry between The Last Post Wins and The Longest Thread.

Posted
1 hour ago, Enter a username said:

Granted. In exactly one year, the nearest tree weighing a thousand pounds or above will fall on your head. There is no way to avoid this. Even if you're in Antarctica, it will somehow travel all the way to your head.

I wish to know the exact nature of this rivalry between The Last Post Wins and The Longest Thread.

granted, you must now join the side of tLT

Spoiler

the rivalry is that tLPW wants to be the longest thread, but tLT also does (and deserves the title because tLPW is mostly *wins* spam)

I wish for tLPW to stop trying to be the longest thread

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