The Battle for the Sandwich

[Unintelligenius he/him]

1 hour ago, NerdSandwich said:

I sprint to you, steal the Sandwich, and sprint away.

I skip up to you, yoink the Sandwich, and jollily skip off into a beautiful green meadow.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I teleport to you, yoink the Sandwich, and jollily teleport away.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

I take the Sandwich back and drop kick you to the moon.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

3 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

I take the Sandwich back and drop kick you to the moon.

I drop kick the moon back. 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

1 minute ago, Ink and Embers said:

I drop kick the moon back. 

I quickly hop over to Mars so that I'm not in the middle of an Earth-moon explosion.

[Bones He/Him]

I travel straight from my vision to Mars. Where I place a French-colored chair and microwave-colored chair in front of you and ask you which one you chose. While you are befuddled, I take the sandwich to Jupiter and drop kick Mars to the Earth-moon explosion.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

Due to a slight mispronunciation, I welcome you to my humble domain of Jewpiter and after you offend my locals I take the Sandwich and turn your chair into a French microwave. Then I punch you all the way to the edge of the universe.

[Shalash Fell From Da Sky He/Him/Chicken]

I classically walk onto jewpiter SACRIFICE SOME LOCALS to teleport to Kaladist of Ketek and do some good old fashioned truthwacking knock the aforementioned Kaladist off jewpiter and claim the hot sauce pickles and peanut butter sandwich before sacrificing the massive half living marshmallow that was definitely there before and teleporting back to my nest in the ember dark. Just before I do I shout “don’t talk about the French everyone knows they don’t exist!!!”

Edited February 11 by Shalash Fell From Da Sky

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

10 hours ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

Due to a slight mispronunciation, I welcome you to my humble domain of Jewpiter and after you offend my locals I take the Sandwich and turn your chair into a French microwave. Then I punch you all the way to the edge of the universe.

I snap my fingers to turn the French microwave into a microwaved Frenchman. 

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

42 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

I snap my fingers to turn the French microwave into a microwaved Frenchman. 

I applaud that someone did what I wanted to happen, then I yeet myself to learn some Jew Jitsu in Jerusalem, New York, so I can take my planet back.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I recover from the dropkick and hire the microwaved Frenchman to steal the Sandwich. He gives it to me.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

3 hours ago, NerdSandwich said:

I recover from the dropkick and hire the microwaved Frenchman to steal the Sandwich. He gives it to me.

I microwave him some more until he agrees to get me the Sandwich and he promptly does.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

But what he does is create a fireproof jacket and win a million dollard.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

He uses the million dollars as kindling to burn down your house and then uses the fireproof jacket to break into your house safely and steal the Sandwich, and then give it to me.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I steal the Sandwich back using a sophisticated method called quantum physics.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I return from my training, and deliver Unintelligenius, NerdSandwich, and the Frenchman each a wickedly cool kick, along with a sound effect, for dramatic effect only. After I do that, I Final Smash the sandwich and it is flung through the universe to some random place that I don't even know of.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

1 hour ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

I return from my training, and deliver Unintelligenius, NerdSandwich, and the Frenchman each a wickedly cool kick, along with a sound effect, for dramatic effect only. After I do that, I Final Smash the sandwich and it is flung through the universe to some random place that I don't even know of.

I thank you for your new book, which is titled "a wickedly cool kick". Then I hop on a slingshot and fling myslef through the universe in search of the Sandwich.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I am flattered and give you a high five

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

.........

And then I turn the entire universe into dust using the surge of Division.

[Bones He/Him]

22 hours ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

Then I punch you all the way to the edge of the universe

 

2 hours ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

I Final Smash the sandwich and it is flung through the universe to some random place that I don't even know of

The random place turns out to be me. I turn Kaladist the Ketek Writer into dust using the Surge of Division before he can turn the universe to dust. Then I drop kick Jewpiter and everyone on it to the Earth-Moon-Mars explosion and I head into the cognitive realm.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

2 hours ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

I am flattered and give you a high five

2 hours ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

.........

And then I turn the entire universe into dust using the surge of Division.

Slay the double poster! 

I pick up the sandwich from where it is floating, as no one else seems inclined to do so. 

[Bones He/Him]

4 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

Slay the double poster! 

I have turned him to dust

 

4 minutes ago, Ashkaloda said:

I pick up the sandwich from where it is floating, as no one else seems inclined to do so.

The sandwich you have is one of many fakes. I go to where you are in the Cognitive realm, grab your bead, and Soulcast you into smoke.

Edited February 12 by Bones

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

12 minutes ago, Bones said:

I have turned him to dust

 

The sandwich you have is one of many fakes. I go to where you are in the Cognitive realm, grab your bead, and Soulcast you into smoke.

I angrily enter your lungs as smoke, and then turn into molten iron. I then point out the identity tag hanging on the sandwich that marks it as the real one (you can’t say the sandwich someone else references is a fake without providing logical reasoning as to how they were tricked into believing it was real). 

[Bones He/Him]

2 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

(you can’t say the sandwich someone else references is a fake without providing logical reasoning as to how they were tricked into believing it was real).

Ah true

I Wayne-swap a fake sandwich with a near identical identity tag for the real one and teleport to the Earth-Moon-Mars-Jewpiter explosion.

Edited February 12 by Bones

[NerdSandwich she/her]

14 hours ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

.........

And then I turn the entire universe into dust using the surge of Division.

I'm luck I was in a different one. I quickly teleport to the Sandwich, atke it, and teleport away.