No, they do that as practice for various military exercises, never as plans that would actually be implemented. Much less them actually preforming a military build up along the borders in preparation for an invasion.
Did she prepare to go through with these plans? Does she have agents in place to carry them out? Does she have the orders written up and only awaiting her signature?
If the answer is yes to these, as it was with the assassinations, then yes, she's still a monster.
That's objectively not true. Some might be killers perhaps, but certainly not murderers, especially those who never see combat.
The car crash is some outside event free from Jasnah's control that doesn't stop her, but causes reconsideration. With Aesudan it's Ivory bonding Jasnah, with Renarin it's him nodding.
That's the problem, for Jasnah it's kill people first ask questions later. Her first reaction was not to ask questions or to confront Renarin, it was to kill him. That she switched from option one to option two, does not in my mind negate the fact that killing was her go to response.
She very much did attempt to kill him. She had summoned her shardblade and had it raised to swing. That she stopped doesn't change the fact that she did try to kill him. She did do that.
I did not absolve him for feeling bad later, though I can see how it might have come across like that. I used it to draw a distinction between Dalinat and Jasnah, while both have done terrible things, Dalinar regrets it. Jasnah doesn't. What in my mind absolves Dalinar was that he changed to the point that he was no longer the same person who did those acts.
Well I'd be unhappy because we have already seen it happen and it would just be a repeat, not out of any offended sense of justice or anything. That one is more of a narrative desire than anything.