The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[Lunamor she/her]

They would eat all of the butter in the universe!!!

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

This was a lofty goal. They would need the help of their allies; the Toastsquirrels. 

[whattheHoid she/her]

Hoid helped collect all the Invested butter!

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Hoid was part of a small sect of people who could sense when butter was Invested. It was a prestigious group. They called themselves...

[whattheHoid she/her]

We were called C.H.U.R.N.B. Chilled High Under Rayse's Nose Butter.

The butter had been churned and Invested under Rayse's nose even after his declaration of no more manufacturing of Invested Butter.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

This worked because Rayse's nose was actually a platypus.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

The demand for Invested butter was extremely high in the right places. People in influential positions would pay exorbitant prices for small amounts.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

No one was quite sure what It did, but it was Invested, so it had to be good.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Besides, if someone did find out what it did then things could go very wrong very fast. Butt knew the secret. Many years ago an old man had told him. 

[xinoehp512 he/him]

The old man was secretly not Hoid.

Edited February 9, 2019 by xinoehp512
700th post!

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Hoid whirled around. "Someone was pretending to be me?"

[Snipexe he/him]

“Or are you pretending to be me?” The old man responded

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

"Or are you pretending to be me?" I said.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

A pop-up add for 4th wall clean up crews appeared in the air of the Longest Thread-Verse.

Edited February 8, 2019 by Shard of Thought

[Darth Woodrack he/him]

It was clicked on and unleashed the horrible malware...

[whattheHoid she/her]

It was entitled, I.B.G.R!, meaning Invested Butter Gone Rouge!

It was what happened when you made a batch and Rayse saw you. He cursed it with Odium.

[Snipexe he/him]

Not just any type of Odium, but sOdium

[Ashspren]

sOdium was far more dangerous than Odium. He appeared when Odium was salty.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

For example, when he had too many saltines.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

This happened more often than you'd think. Odium had a problem.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

Odium pulled out a saltine and put a piece of cheese on it.

As he munched on the snack he reflected that it could have been worse. He could have been addicted to sardines.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Yes, that would have been terrible. The last Shard that ended up like that... well. Things hadn't gone down well. 

[xinoehp512 he/him]

In fact, it had gone so horribly that everyone had forgotten about it to avoid going insane from its horribleness.

Luckily, it was irrevelant, so it didn't matter.

[Borio Singaldi he/him]

What was relevant was the fact that Borio Singaldi was hungry for cupcakes, bacon, pancake batter, and total victory over the "Last Post Wins" thread.

[Jaywalk he/him]

Because of the pure power of awesomeness, the Longest Thread claimed victory, for it was a sentient being and easily crushed the Last Post thread.