The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[Edema Rue she/her]

Jasnah thought they were angry because of her, and was satisfied, thinking that her plan had worked. 

[Immortal Platypus]

They were so angry, the decided to storm her Death Star by force.

[EmulatonStromenkiin he/him]

However, Jasnah's death Star could release smaller targeted lasers to destroy other things.

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Hoid found the thermal exhaust port and blew it up before it could cause any more damage.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

Because they were angry, they threw tomatoes, covering the streets with tomatoes.

[NameIess]

This fulfilled the requirements for the Great Mage to return, as laid out in the prophecy of 515. This prophecy was as follows:

When tomatoes cover the streets, and Jasnah Kholin's death star has been exploded by Hoid, and Lift and Kelsier have worked together to monopolize all the pancakes, then and only then shall the Great Mage return. Also, this shall happen on page 2247.

[Edema Rue she/her]

And so, the Great Mage returned…from the bathroom. 

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

This made many people very uneasy, and with good reason.

[Edema Rue she/her]

He had a piece of toilet paper stuck to his shoe. 

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

A clear sign that he had no soul.

[NameIess]

The empty eye sockets also hinted towards that conclusion.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

The towns people prepared a barrier of blades around a quarter of the town. 

[NameIess]

The Great Mage ignored this, loudly announcing that he'd just made his greatest prophecy yet.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

Inae, a rather foolhardy villager, asked what it was, shouting over the battlements.

[NameIess]

The Great Mage replied that it was about taters.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

Inae wondered aloud whether it meant death and doom and destruction—the three halcyonic d’s.

[NameIess]

It did not, replied the Great Mage. In fact, it was something even greater than those.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

“Greater than death, doom, and destruction?” Inae called to the villagers  to start digging an underground colony, then turned back to the Great Mage. “What does it entail?”

[NameIess]

"I thought I told you. It involves Taters."

Edited November 26, 2022 by Nameless

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

A random spirit appeared. "Totaters?"

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

“Yes, but… danger?”

[Edema Rue she/her]

And that was when thousands of flaming taters began falling from the sky. 

[NameIess]

"This wasn't part of the prophecy!" The Great Mage was very put out.

[The Wandering Wizard he/him]

The Great Mage was attacked by thwaps for this heresy.

[S. Stormy she/her]

But the thwaps quickly became distracted by the taters, which seemed similar to totatoes.