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I am a stick!


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She really need an infused ruby if she was going to convince something to become fire.  Although even if she could have, I doubt the brief flame from the stick would have been enough to light anything else and she still wouldn't have been able to get a fire going.

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*In very commanding voice full of authority*

"You are a fire."

(This goes along with "One only has to say they are the sister of the king, and act like it, to be treated as such." [That is not a direct quote… it's a paraphrase.])


"I am a stick"

"No, you are a fire."

"I am a stick."

"You have lied to yourself. You have lied so deeply that you believe it with your whole heat."

"Fire doesn't have a heart."

"Heat. You are fire. You have heat. It is time to face the lies you have made. You are fire."

"Yes... yes, I am fire."


*Calls in a Forger from Sel*

(Except for the fact that they aren't quite that good......)

Edited by Stroniax
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Game aside, I have to say Shallan was disappointing. After all, her training with Jasnah, her having to take apart every argument and in turn form theories based on convincing arguments obviously makes her the perfect candidate for the whole "Convincing things they wanna turn into other things"-operation. Ah well, I guess almost being killed in your sleep, having your mentor die in front of you just to then almost drown can throw you off your game a bit.

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"I'm a STICK."

"You certainly are, and a very sexy stick at that."

"I'm a sexy stick?"

"Not JUST a sexy stick, you're a smokin hot stick!"

"I'm a smoking hot stick?"

"Not just a smokin hot stick, you're on fire."

"I'm on FIRE?!?!

"You sure are, hows it feel?"



Edited by Gloom
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Heh heh, upvote. Can you name the twelve tasks in order (without looking)?


'Fraid not, by Toutatis :( .




For the next task, you must descend into the chasms and face the fearsome chasmfiend.


...Later: How was the chasmfiend?


Obelix: Very tasty.


This movie is overdue for a remake, say, "12 tasks of Asterix on Roshar" sounds good. :rolleyes:

Task one: Outrace Kaladin The Windrunner from Abamabar to Urithru, during a highstorm.

Task two: Outthrow the ... Plated Dalinar in chull throwing?

Win against Shin unarmed master

Cross the Reshi Sea without staying on the Isles

Resist the Soulcaster

Fight the Chasmfiend


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"You wish to become fire, do you not?"

"I am a stick!"

"Technically, you are a collection of atoms and molecules with the right combination of oxygen, carbon, and other organic matter to form a stick."

"I... am a stick?"

"That may be your reasoning, but logic dictates that you could have become a tree, or a shrub, or even defecation matter instead of a stick. The fact that you are a stick is a random happenstance."

"... I am a stick."

"Again, correct, but you could have been many other things than a stick. Compared to those minute differences in molecular structure and form, it is not unreasonable to presume that you could have become a piece of wood meant for burning. Do you not desire to become something different that what you are? To become a piece of wood for burning?"


"Indeed. To be a piece of wood for burning is noble. You, as a stick, could burn. You could be different from the other sticks out there. This difference is not nearly as large as you think. No change of molecules or atoms would take place. You would be the same stick as you are now, except that you are now meant to burn. To be a part of a noble calling."

"... I am for burning!"

"Very good."

Edited by Chrono
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I am a stick


But you could be a jalapeno on a stick and i shall call you Jose,


I am a stick


And you still will be a stick but better because you will be jose the jalapeno on a stick


I am jose the jalapeno on a stick


Doesn't the jalapeno burn?


Yes It burns


So your a burning sticks?


 Yes I am a burning stick (poof fire)

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Has anyone considered that maybe the stick has a good point? Maybe being a stick is better than being fire. Maybe being a stick is better than being a lot of things. Haven't you ever in your life thought: "Gee, I'd much rather be a stick right now"? I thought so.


Perhaps stickyness is the ideal state of being. When one reaches Nirvana, they become stick. Instead of asking the stick to become fire, we should be asking if we can become stick.


Join the cult of the stick my friends!

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