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"And then the murders began."


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This is something I saw on Facebook a little earlier today and thought it could be fun. Make "And then the murders began." the second line of a story. There are some good examples, such as:

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“I wonder what Piglet is doing," thought Pooh. And then the murders began.

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Mr & Mrs Dursley, of number 4, Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. And then the murders began.

For fun I looked at a few of Brandon's books and - unsurprisingly - they produced similarly funny results:

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On the three-hundredth anniversary of my birth, I finally managed to conquer the world. And then the murders began.

-- Perfect State

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Anthony Davis—one of only two real people in a city of twenty million—caught the burrito his partner tossed to him. And then the murders began.

-- Snapshot

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Ash fell from the sky. And then the murders began.

-- Mistborn: The Final Empire

Some of the others are actually strangely... not funny. A good number of Brandon's books apparently start with a line that already sets up a murderous mood (e.g. "Szeth-son-son-Vallano, Truthless of Shinovar, wore white on the day he was to kill a king" from The Way of Kings (yes, yes, that's the prologue, not the prelude; sue me) or "Marsh struggled to kill himself." from The Hero of Ages) - and so appending the "And then the murders began." doesn't have the same juxtaposing effect. And then there is this:

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It’s funny, Vasher thought, how many things begin with me getting thrown into prison. And then the murders began.

-- Warbreaker

Got anything else funny around?

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Eerie how we both went this way at near the same time... Guess it's cause we both subscribe to the same FB fan groups, lol!


 

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Prince Raoden of Arelon awoke early that morning, completely unaware that he had been damned for all eternity. And then the murders began....

Ehh....

 

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Shai pressed her fingernail into one of the stone blocks of her prison cell. And then the murders began...

Hmm...

Maybe not ALL novels... lol

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First Harry Potter was good, but the second? Not for the first time, an argument had broken out over breakfast at number four, Privet Drive. And then the murders began.

Once, in a house on Egypt street, there lived a rabbit who was made almost entirely of china. And then the murders began.

"Lady Sarene begs your forgiveness. She's going to be a tad late for dinner." And then the murders began.

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A couple work

Lift prepared to be awesome. And then the murders began.

Kelsier burned the eleventh metal. And then the murders began.

But you're right, the rest of then already have the tense lead-in and it makes the additions pretty redundant.

On the other hand it's glorious with the acknowledgements :D

I first pitched the idea of later-era Mistborn novels to my editor back in 2006, I believe. And then the murders began.

I finished the first draft of The Way of Kings in 2003, but I started working on pieces of the book back in the late ’90s. And then the murders began.

THIS one has been a long time brewing. And then the murders began.

 

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Once there were four children whose names were Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy. And then the murders began. —The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

It was nearing midnight and the Prime Minister was sitting alone in his office, reading a long memo that was slipping through his brain without leaving the slightest trace of meaning behind. And then the murders began. —Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

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It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. And then the murders began. - George Orwell, 1984.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. And then the murders began. - Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities.

Edited by bleeder
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"The doors swung open and High Priest Auron Tenebrae strode into the room, his robe swirling around his tall, narrow frame. And then the murders began." - Derek Landy, Mortal Coil

"Tana woke lying in a bathtub. And then the murders began." - Holly Black, The Coldest Girl in Coldtown

"Wind howled through the night, carrying a scent that would change the world. And then the murders began." - Christopher Paolini, Eragon

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One fish. Two fish. Red fish. Blue fish. And then the murders began.

"He was just too incredible in every aspect of his life to be allowed to live." And then the murders began.

What does the fox say? "JOHN CENA!!!" And then the murders began.

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Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. And then the murders began.

(And please, to my American friends, no offense is intended :))

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"I will build a great wall -- and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me --and I'll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words." And then the murders began.

I apologize for the weird black thingy.

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16 minutes ago, Extesian said:

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. And then the murders began.

(And please, to my American friends, no offense is intended :))

This American found it funny. :P

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I want to do a Hillary Clinton quote just to balance things out, but I'm afraid of accidentally veering too far into political territory, so here's one from something completely different. 

"A throng of bearded men, in sad-colored garments and gray, steeple-crowned hats, intermixed with women, some wearing hoods, and others bareheaded, was assembled in front of a wooden edifice, the door of which was heavily timbered with oak, and studded with iron spikes. And then the murders began."

Huh. That actually improves The Scarlet Letter a great deal. :ph34r: 

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6 hours ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said:

I want to do a Hillary Clinton quote just to balance things out, but I'm afraid of accidentally veering too far into political territory, so here's one from something completely different. 

 

Yep I stay faaaar away from politics here and now so for something lighter

There was Eru, the One, who in Arda is called Iluvatar; and he made first the Ainur, the Holy Ones, that were the offspring of his thought, and they were with him before aught else was made. And then the murders began.

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