Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[Gizmosowner he/him]

7 minutes ago, Tazren said:

Granted, but something goes wrong during the transition so all the Breaths are permanently lost. 

I wish for a life of perfect health with fast recovery from any injuries. 

Granted but you must constantly injure yourself because it will over grow your body like dead pool exept worse because it will keep building up living flesh so you become a blob.

i wish that I am physically strong enough to punch TLR in the chest and obliterate his upper body.

[Landis963 he/him]

43 minutes ago, Gizmosowner said:

I wish that I am physically strong enough to punch TLR in the chest and obliterate his upper body.

Granted.  You are now foolhardy enough to try it.  Enjoy the quick death you are about to receive.  

I wish I could instinctively persuade anyone to pick up the phone when I call them.

[Gizmosowner he/him]

28 minutes ago, Landis963 said:

Granted.  You are now foolhardy enough to try it.  Enjoy the quick death you are about to receive.  

I wish I could instinctively persuade anyone to pick up the phone when I call them.

Granted but when they answer they scream as loud as they possibly can and you will always have it right next o your ear.

I wish that I was on I potent and that I could use my powers wisely and for good without limit

[Tazren he/him]

54 minutes ago, Gizmosowner said:

Granted but when they answer they scream as loud as they possibly can and you will always have it right next o your ear.

I wish that I was on I potent and that I could use my powers wisely and for good without limit

Omnipotent? Granted. Your bane is that with this vast wisdom and power, you come to realise that the only wise course of action is to not interfere in mortal affairs. 

I wish that I could compile computer programs mentally, being able to fully understand them just by looking at the code.

Edit: Whooops, forgot to add a wish!

Edited February 23, 2017 by Tazren

[Gizmosowner he/him]

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Edited February 23, 2017 by Gizmosowner

[Mr. Staccato he/him]

8 hours ago, Tazren said:

I wish that I could compile computer programs mentally, being able to fully understand them just by looking at the code.

In order for you to fully understand code, you have TO BE code. Therefore, you are now a piece of living AI in the world of Matrix - it was either that or turning you into a digimon. Oh joy.

I wish for a ham and TLC sandwich. That does not somehow become a monster and will eat me. (I know your tricks you tricky sharders you....)

Edited February 24, 2017 by Mr. Staccato

[The One Who Connects he/him]

18 minutes ago, Mr. Staccato said:

I wish for a ham and TLC sandwich. That does not somehow become a monster and will eat me. (I know your tricks you tricky sharders you....)

Granted, have your sandwich. I won't even do anything to it, it's just a normal sandwich. Your bane is that you are too paranoid about what we might have done that you don't end up eating it.

I wish for.. I wish to be clever

[Hemalurgic Headshot he/him]

Yes, well you could be clever, but what would happen then? You see, being clever is only the first step, but you know that. But what is the second step? And then, inevitably, you will be too much for the world to handle, and then they will kill you. You will be your own demise.

I, on the other hand, wish for a paradoxical box.

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

Granted. You receive a paradoxical box. It is highly paradoxical, and highly... boxical? Anyway, it is everything you hoped it would be.

You're bane is that the nightwatcher smites you with a terrible pun. Enjoy your parabox.

I wish for a good idea for what I should wish for next time.

Edited February 24, 2017 by Drake Marshall

[Hemalurgic Headshot he/him]

Granted. You will now wish for a man that makes you tacos in your next post. However, the bane for that wish will be four times as worse than before, and you now have rabies.

I saw "parabox" coming. 

I wish that whenever I play a board game, that the actions of that board game are directly applied to a real-world penguin. Ex: if I capture Mexico in Risk, then an entire army of penguins will spontaneously appear and conquer Mexico.

[Mr. Staccato he/him]

Granted. But since the Nightwatcher only knows board games from Roshar your power only works on chess, checkers, some odd equivalent of Alethi mahjong, and unsurprisingly enough, marbles. And that's just the natural consequences of your (very, very weird) wish!

Your actual bane is that from now on until you next make a wish all your posts here must be made in the form of a haiku(s)! 

I wish for a subtle, seemingly useless power that has no purpose outside of simple amusement - like having the power to convince people to take off their socks with just a whisper! Something like that.

Edited February 24, 2017 by Mr. Staccato
Emoji

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

Granted. You have the ability to make trees spontaneously drop all their leaves. In exchange you are now colorblind.

I wish for a man that makes me tacos.

[Hemalurgic Headshot he/him]

Granted. He has drugs.

the Feds are after him, and

you too, as partner.

 

I wish to be free 

of this poetic trap, yes please.

 I wish to be free.

[Brightness Enna she/her]

Granted. You no longer have to post in haikus. (The second line of the second has eight syllables, by the way)

As your bane, you lose all your fingernails. 

I wish for a packet of Alfredo sauce (I'm all out and really want pasta)

Edited February 25, 2017 by Brightness Enna

[Lord_of_Awesome]

2 hours ago, Brightness Enna said:

Granted. You no longer have to post in haikus. (The second line of the second has eight syllables, by the way)

As your bane, you lose all your fingernails. 

I wish for a packet of Alfredo sauce (I'm all out and really want pasta)

Granted.

Here's your unoriginal bane:

You must watch this video up until 0:14;

Then you will scream the Wilhelm scream and then die in a Death Star trash compactor.

I know they're different movie franchises but I'm a New Zealander so I'm allowed to use Lord of the Rings alongside any other movie. Deal with it.

I wish for the ability to have more original banes.

 

 

 

[Hemalurgic Headshot he/him]

Granted. However, they must all be applied to every adorable puppy in existence before they are applied to the target.

I wish for a garden of watermelons, that after they are fully grown, pick themselves and go plant more gardens of watermelons.

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

Granted. The watermelons grow, and grow... And spread, and spread, and spread... Because these watermelons have the most effective self-proliferation mechanism known to the plant kingdom, they swiftly spread over the entire world. The world now has a bountiful supply of delicious watermelons.

Your bane is that this new strain of watermelon is carnivorous. Also, since this strain is not native to any particular location, it quickly out-competes the vast majority of other plant species, causing mass extinction.

 

I wish for the ability to manipulate how strongly both fear and pain effect me, with precision.

[Mr. Staccato he/him]

3 hours ago, Drake Marshall said:

I wish for the ability to manipulate how strongly both fear and pain effect me, with precision.

Granted. Your power works with such precision that you are basically hacking your body at a near-cellular basis. This power requires an in-depth understanding of psychology, neurology, bodily chemistry, and psychosomatic responses though so I suggest you crack open a book, or two (or maybe an entire library's worth of books like this) before you attempt to use your power - you might just end up numb for life.

As for your bane, you now hear "Darube - Sandstorm" playing non-stop in your ear. Only another sharder can lift you of this curse, and they must do so by willingly letting themselves get stabbed by you with a hemalurgic spike. Happy hunting~ I'm a continent away from you. 

I wish Soonie Cub stuff toys were in real life... 

[DrakeMarshall he/him]

14 hours ago, Mr. Staccato said:

Granted. Your power works with such precision that you are basically hacking your body at a near-cellular basis. This power requires an in-depth understanding of psychology, neurology, bodily chemistry, and psychosomatic responses though so I suggest you crack open a book, or two (or maybe an entire library's worth of books like this) before you attempt to use your power - you might just end up numb for life.

As for your bane, you now hear "Darube - Sandstorm" playing non-stop in your ear. Only another sharder can lift you of this curse, and they must do so by willingly letting themselves get stabbed by you with a hemalurgic spike. Happy hunting~ I'm a continent away from you. 

I wish Soonie Cub stuff toys were in real life... 

Granted. They now exist in real life. In fact, you can even have one.

Your bane is that you are no longer a continent away from me. I've got a spike with your name on it.

I wish to know the nature of Cusicesh, the Protector.

[Hemalurgic Headshot he/him]

Granted. But now your soul is sentenced to Damnation. Have fun!

 

I wish that I had a tawny frogmouth (it's a bird) named Stumpy that could metabolize the emotions of those around it and convert the energy it gained into lasers that it shoots from its eyes.

[Jedal he/him]

4 hours ago, Hemalurgic_Headshot said:

Granted. But now your soul is sentenced to Damnation. Have fun!

 

I wish that I had a tawny frogmouth (it's a bird) named Stumpy that could metabolize the emotions of those around it and convert the energy it gained into lasers that it shoots from its eyes.

Granted. But the first thing it wants to do is shoot its lasers at your face.

 

I want to have the acute ability to increase or decrease emotions in others and myself.

[Hemalurgic Headshot he/him]

Granted. But your perception of what emotions are is distorted, and you often create very awkward situations, like by making someone feeling psychotic at a funeral.

I wish for a pencil that has multiple multi use tips. A "Swiss army pencil", if you will.

[Mr. Staccato he/him]

Granted. There is now such a thing as a "Swiss army pencil." Wayne has it.

I wish that the next book Brandon Sanderson writes has a magic system fuelled by caffeine intake. Because everybody loves coffee.  (Oh I love you coffee so much... *makes embarrassing noises*)

[A Secret Corner he/him]

Granted. One of the effects of the coffee is that it makes you sleepy (in the magic system). Your bane is that coffee beans are as valuable as aluminum, and are priced similarly.

 

I wish to petition the nightwatcher for 10 more wishes.

[Hemalurgic Headshot he/him]

Granted. The Nightwatcher gives you a piece of notebook paper with the words "ten wishes" scribbled on it. The paper then jumps down your throat and gives you diabetes. The Nightwatcher doesn't play games.

I wish for a grove of trees whose pollen gives magical powers to those who breathe it. The pollen is pink and smells like lemons.