What Happened in Portland

[Kobold King]

Lightwards smiled despite his irritation as the Museum grew larger and larger in his sight. He used it as a reminder for why he shouldn't try to kill Funtimes, no matter how much he was beginning to want to. She was one of the most powerful Epics he had ever seen, and this Museum would be a constant reminder of it.

 

A reminder of our power, he told himself. She made it float, but I'm the one who whispered the thought into her empty head. I am the one who populated the place with Warriors. None of this would be possible without me.

 

The litter set down by the heavily damaged front door, where the bronze brachiosaur stood over a handful of wrecked cars that had been lifted up along with the Museum. There was no sign of Purple Phoenix, but his Coelophysis was standing by the very edge of the flying fortress, its head staring down to the city below.

 

Lightwards stepped out of his litter and whistled for the rest of his raptors. Seven Deinonychus soon stood before him, their eyes locked onto their master as they awaited orders.

 

"Find Purple Phoenix," he commanded. "Search the building. Report back once he is located." The man was probably using a restroom or something, but Lightwards liked to make sure.

 

The raptors fanned out through the building, and Lightwards took a look around. Clearly there was a substantial mess to clean up. Nighthound's crazed ride had trashed substantial portions of the building, and odd little potholes dotted the floor, as if someone had dug up the tiles and filled them with rubble. He couldn't remember that happening during the fight. Maybe he'd just missed it in between breaking a rib and dying from gunshot wounds?

 

He set the old man from the crowd to work sweeping up debris, raising up the male Regways to help in the clean-up. The rest of his human Warriors he fed to the Acrocanthosaurus. He reached a hand into a pile of puked up human remains, touching a hand he was pretty sure had belonged to Hotwire. He surged his miracle into the hand, expecting his first Epic Warrior of Light.

 

Nothing happened. Lightwards frowned, trying again. Each time he felt some form of resistance from the corpse. As if there were something already there, fighting him. Turning from the regurgitated Hotwire, he instead bent to face the dead Blindside Nighthound had left laying on the ground. The same happened with him.

 

For some reason, Lightwards couldn't perform his miracle on other Epics. He was irritated about the fact, but moreover it made him curious. If he could reanimate fragments of protein material from fossilized dinosaur skeletons, why were mostly intact Epic remains so difficult? Clearly this would require further research, but for now Lightwards decided to attend to other matters. Blindside's body was given to the tyrannosaur as a treat as the professor headed deeper into the building.

 

The Museum was a large building, but Lightwards toured it briskly. Every now and then he'd come across a specimen that caught his attention and he raised it up. The ranks of his Warriors were soon bolstered by varying numbers of stuffed lions, tigers, leopards, buffalo, and grizzlies. Eventually he found that raising corpses was growing slightly more difficult--he was approaching the limit to his power. But that was all right by his book. By his estimate, there were easily over fifty different creatures defending the halls, and he could easily raise at least a dozen more human Warriors if need be.

 

The completion of the Museum tour brought a sense of ease and security to Lightwards, but also a hint of concern. Purple Phoenix was nowhere to be seen. True, they'd left him alone here, and as another Epic they couldn't expect him to wait patiently for their return like a servant. But he could have at least left a note.

 

Lightwards stepped out the Museum doors and fixated his attention on the Coelophysis. "You!" he barked. "Where is Purple Phoenix?"

 

The sleek, feather-covered dinosaur continued staring off the edge and towards the ground. Fascinating that it had feathers--Lightwards had once argued that Triassic theropods couldn't possibly have evolved that sort of covering at such an early point in their evolution...

 

He shook himself, doing his best to ignore his more scholarly impulses. Instead he seized the animal's head and oriented it towards himself. "Take me to your master."

 

The Coelophysis stared at him blankly before slowly drifting its head back to the ground. Lightwards let out a growl of frustration. "Obey me! You will follow his orders, but I am the one who gave you life. You will listen to me."

 

The dinosaur angled its head back to face him, then bobbed its pointed head off of the building.

 

Oh, Lightwards thought suddenly. He left the building. Maybe Purple Phoenix was a flying Epic and had simply glided away. He felt slightly foolish for not inquiring about his new allies' powers.

 

"Did he do anything before he left?" he asked the bird-like creature.

 

The Coelophysis stared vacantly for a moment, then turned and darted inside.

 

"Sparks--where do you think you're going--"

 

Lightwards ran after the moronic creature, reaching it just in time to see it explode.

 

With a curse, he caught a piece of leg that had gone flying and resurrected the creature, which dropped to its haunches and began bobbing its head rhythmically. Lightwards slowly examined the small crater where the explosion had occurred--it seemed as if some form of explosive had been concealed behind a loose wall tile, and that Phoenix's dinosaur had set it off during the course of its command-following.

 

He caught a brief glimpse of shining purple pebbles losing their glow.

 

He gritted his teeth, glimmers of rage and suspicion growing in him. What the Calamity has that man done to my fortress?

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Nathan had servants. 

 

He almost wished he hadn't used that term. It applied, true. And while calling the four people he and Funtimes had chosen special friends or party animals or people who won't become zombies anytime soon might have been more accurate, it wouldn't keep them safe. Servant was a safe term. Many Epics had servants, and those servants were permitted to live so long as they were useful. 

 

But as Nathan tried to think of a few tasks he could dole out, he was unable to find anything he needed accomplished that he couldn't accomplish himself. He could clean his own toilets, cook his own food, wash his own clothes. He had four servants with nothing to do. 

 

"So what do we do now, master?" The redneck, who still held his empty rifle, leaned on the word master so heavily it sounded like a curse. 

 

Oh great, now I'll have to slap him or something. 

 

He was saved by a sound from a nearby alleyway—a rush of air accompanied by a loud "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH—KABOOM!" A cloud of purple dust issued from the point of impact. 

 

Funtimes clapped her hands. "Let's go see!" 

 

She went first, skipping toward the alley, and the kilted Darth Vader rode after, his bagpipes belching flame. Nathan herded the other three from behind, though they obeyed without a word. 

 

What could he order them to do? Conceivably: anything. Any task from scrubbing floors to hand-feeding a saber-tooth tiger to jumping out a window for his enjoyment was within the realm of possibility. The second and third options turned his stomach; the first made him feel uncomfortable. He had no right to tell them what to do. Not when he could complete their tasks himself—should do them himself. The only thing separating him from them was a neon tie and a duster. 

 

Funtimes poked her head from around a corner. "Doctor AWE-some-sauce! We FOUND something!" 

 

"What'd you find?" 

 

She giggled. "Come and see!" 

 

Suppressing a sigh with a chuckle and a shake of his head, Nathan led the rest of their servants into the alley. 

Edited August 16, 2014 by TwiLyghtSansSparkles

[Voidus]

Penumbra stepped out of the shadows in the alleyway watching the purple dust from the impact settle, that's what the idiot got for pretending to be an Epic, pretend powers could only take you so far, eventually you'd either be discovered or killed. Which in a sense were both the same thing.
Shadows writhed around him as he surveyed his surrounding, dimly hearing a commotion coming from the Alleys opening, where a woman in extremely strange clothes came skipping along, took a quick glance to assess the scene, then skipped back to talk to someone else.
Penumbra prepared his shadows, his blood boiling, it was time to let everyone know that a new shadow had arrived in the city.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Shadows writhed and twisted as Nathan approached the alley. Being a Newcagoan, he knew that shadows were only supposed to do that in a poorly lit ballroom—or in the presence of a shadow Epic like Nightweilder. For a startling moment, he thought the Epic in the shadows might indeed be Nightweilder, but he was in Oregon and Nightweilder was in Newcago. Steelheart wouldn't waste one of his inner circle on a search-and-find mission for a single casino server. 

 

"He's here and he's so much fun!" 

 

Nathan took in the twisting shadows with a growing sense of dread. Nightweilder was many things. Terrible. Awe-inspiring. Powerful. Fun was not a term any Newcagoan in their right mind would apply to a shadow-weilding Epic of darkness. 

 

"Did you meet him?" 

 

She giggled. "Nope!" 

 

"So how do you know he's fun?" 

 

"He will be when we're through with him!" She lifted a few bits of garbage—a badly dented can, three smoldering wads of paper, a twisted plastic bottle—transforming them into tiny lanterns that glowed pink and green and blue. With a tap of her finger, the lanterns began to flicker like strobe lights. 

 

"The guy's a shadow Epic." The redneck made it not a question, but a statement. He already knew. 

 

Funtimes nodded eagerly. 

 

"And we're going at him with light." 

 

She nodded again. 

 

The redneck blinked. "Thought we wanted him to like us." 

 

"Who doesn't like blinky lights?" 

 

Nathan was more inclined to agree with the redneck, but he saw the wisdom in her plan. "If he's already angry, we'll have protection. If not, the lights are small enough to be tossed aside." 

 

Giggling again, Funtimes peered around the corner, then motioned for the others to follow. Tiny lanterns cast strange and colorful rays on the brick as they flickered. 

[Mailliw73]

After Voidgaze had cried out about ransacking the place, the rest of the group began to walk inside. Sightline teleported himself inside. Kathy stayed with Travis and nervously walked inside. Al tried to hurry and catch up with Voidgaze. Joshua was the only one who stayed with Altermind. "Let's go," Altermind said. Joshua nodded and the pair began to walk in.

---------------------------------------

Psy-Fi headed towards the bows. He could use an upgrade and some more arrows couldn't hurt. Altermind wanted to try one out too. Psy-Fi had come to this store as an adolescent who loved the idea of bows. He knew exactly where to go. Everything in here seemed disorganized though. It appeared that weapons and equipment had been used and then put down wherever the user was when it was convenient. Psy-Fi suddenly saw an explosive thrown in front of them. Realizing it was his Precog, he jumped sideways and tackled Altermind to protect them from the blast of the real explosive. Altermind suddenly disappeared from where Psy-Fi was and appeared ahead with another Psy-Fi. Realizing it was a hallucination, Psy-Fi nodded towards where he thought Altermind was and they snuck around the aisle they were in and came around the back. They saw a man throw a piece of cardboard towards their images and the cardboard exploded right on them. Altermind changed the hallucination, making it only for the exploding man, now that he knew where and who he was, and made the hallucination into exploded body parts.

[Voidus]

Penumbra watched the end of the alley as some flickering multi-colored lights illuminated the brick walls, a group of people led by the strangely dressed woman appeared, all of them holding a strobing lantern, did they think that would be enough to hold him back? He was penumbra! That which connected the worlds of light and dark.
The shadows surrounding him stilled as the group approached, and then moved with an abrupt speed, forming hands which picked up anything that littered the alley nearby, ready in the blink of an eye to send a rapid cascade of broken glass, trash cans and pieces of rubble towards the newcomers.
He encased himself completely in shadow, becoming just a black blur with a barely discernible core.
"I am Penumbra, and this city will be taken under the shadow." he said, shadows distorting his voice until by the time it reached the ragged group before him it would barely sound human.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

"I am Penumbra." The voice was low and quivering, as though filtered through a dozen tin cans and glass bottles. "And this city will be taken under the shadow." As if to emphasize his point, rubble and broken glass were lifted by tendrils of darkness and held as projectiles. One reached directly through a ray of light. 

 

"I'm Doctor Funtimes, and this city will be turned into a giant smiley face!" 

 

Nathan cleared his throat. "What do you want from us, Penumbra? Perhaps we can reach an agreement." 

 

"You want to agree with a shadow?" the redneck muttered. 

 

"It's better than disagreeing with one," Nathan muttered back. 

[Voidus]

"I'm Doctor Funtimes, and this city will be turned into a giant smiley face!"  The woman, an Epic?, dared to speak back to him in such a manner? was she mocking him? His rage trebled as he observed her.
"What do you want from us, Penumbra? Perhaps we can reach an agreement."  said another, a man this time. Yes these two seemed to be the leaders, Epics in all likelihood given that they weren't running from his display, but how powerful he couldn't tell. Could he afford a confrontation with two of them? Possibly more if they had backup nearby.
He glanced towards the sky, seeing for the first time a museum floating there, if these Epics lived in this city chances are they wouldn't be near such a blatant display of power unless they had something to do with it. No, perhaps not the time to confront these ones yet, but he would also not ally himself with them, not with anyone.
"An agreement? You cannot reach an agreement with the shadow. I will spare you for now, I need to find other lights to extinguish today." He rasped back to the male Epic.
Faintly in the distance he heard the sound of what seemed to be a convoy of cars, he'd also heard what sounded like a much heavier car, perhaps even a tank for a moment. But then it was gone.
"There's someone else nearby, perhaps an ally of yours, perhaps an enemy."
The shadows released their grip on the assorted junk in the alley, pooling around Penumbras shoulders and back, forming a pair of wings.
A couple of test flaps and he had the hang of them.
"Given that you rushed over to the sight of Phoenix's falling body I assume you know him?" he asked, a tendril of shadow picking up a nearby fallen bowler hat. He needed all the information on what Phoenix had been doing that he could find. He needed that information, but his blood was boiling in his veins, urging him to move, to fight, to crush the light out of those who crossed him. He needed to hunt.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

"An agreement? You cannot reach an agreement with the shadow. I will spare you for now, I need to find other lights to extinguish today."

 

"I told you so," the redneck muttered. 

 

"You said nothing of the sort." 

 

He grunted. "So you're no mind reader. Good to know." 

 

Nathan tried to think of a witty comeback, or even an angry one, but responses of any sort eluded him when the debris fell to the concrete with various clanks and shatters. The tendrils retreated, deepened the darkness around Penumbra, and spread into a pair of bat-like wings that flapped slowly at first, lifting Penumbra from the ground. 

 

He can fly. Wonderful. That is wonderful. 

 

"Given that you rushed over to the sight of Phoenix's falling body I assume you know him?"

 

A shadow lifted a purple bowler hat and held it out for inspection. Funtimes put her hands to her cheeks as Nathan connected the purple explosion with the living shadow before them. 

 

​"That's….Purple Phoenix….his hat…." She stamped her foot, her hands clenching into fists. "What did you do with that magnificent beard of a man, you stupid bogey?" 

 

"Did you mean the American definition or the British one, dear?" 

 

"Both!" 

 

"Appropriate, for our ally's murderer." He directed a glare at the shadow. "Why did you kill him? I'm assuming you don't need a reason, but if you have one, we would like it now." 

Edited August 16, 2014 by TwiLyghtSansSparkles

[Voidus]

He watched their faces carefully for a reaction to the name, Epics tried to hide any emotions other than disdain but they still had them, they were just more subtle... usually.
"What did you do with that magnificent beard of a man, you glorified bogey?" The crazy woman screeched, stamping her foot.
This one is either seriously insane or else a brilliant actor. He thought to himself.
 "Why did you kill him? I'm assuming you don't need a reason, but if you have one, we would like it now." The male Epic inquired, not so much emotion to this one, just that glare which one would expect if he thought his ally had been murdered.
Penumbra chuckled to himself before answering.
"Murdered? I have no reason to want that one dead, although he's nearly managed it several times himself I don't doubt, culminating with free falling into the ground just now, stupid man really trying to imitate an Epic with tech that was barely out of the prototyping stage. but don't worry he's not dead he'll just be... incapacitated for some time." He gave that pause as much weight as he could, letting it carry with it the promise of terrible things to come should they attempt to intervene with him.
"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going out hunting. You'll see the Phoenix again soon I'm sure, and I might drop in to see you all again sometime." He finished with a grin, eyes briefly flickering up to the flying museum where he assumed they were based.
With one last flap he crested the alley walls, already seeing several victims fleeing him. The shadows stirred around them as he focused in on one, going in for the kill.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Purple Phoenix woke with a horrific headache, his bowler falling from where it lay grasped in his hand. What had happened? He was falling, he remembered hitting... something, his explosives went off, why wasn't  he hurt?
"Huh, well I guess that Epic hasn't stopped my abilities after all mr. Voice." He said to himself, standing up and dusting off.
"Looks like I am still immortal"
Strangely he received no response from his Voice which usually responded when he addressed it directly, perhaps something to do with a head wound? Sparks, why did it still hurt so?
He walked down the street near to the mouth of an alley with some strange flickering lights in it, wait was that? Oh great just what he needed when he had a splitting headache, more crazy people.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

"Murdered? I have no reason to want that one dead, although he's nearly managed it several times himself I don't doubt, culminating with free falling into the ground just now, stupid man really trying to imitate an Epic with tech that was barely out of the prototyping stage. but don't worry he's not dead he'll just be... incapacitated for some time." 

 

A long pause followed those words, making Penumbra's intentions clear. 

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going out hunting. You'll see the Phoenix again soon I'm sure, and I might drop in to see you all again sometime."

 

His wings flapped once, twice, three times, setting the wind to whipping about their faces and hair. Penumbra rose into the sky, but even in the light Nathan couldn't make out any distinguishable features. Nothing to indicate that Penumbra was anything more than a living shadow. He soared over the adjacent building and vanished from view. 

 

​"That stupidhead!" Funtimes stamped her foot again. "I'm going to turn the museum into a giant flashlight, and I'm going to shine it on him!" 

 

Useful as that sounded, Nathan doubted the other Epics would take kindly to their base being transformed into an enormous flashlight. Then again, Lightwards had seemed pretty enthusiastic about his new bowler hat….

 

"We should be getting back." 

 

"But Purple Phoenix is still out there!" 

 

She was right. Nathan had seen him fall, seen his discarded bowler hat. Penumbra had given it to them. Something about the situation, about the way Phoenix had vanished right where Penumbra had appeared, seemed off to him. But no—they had entirely different powers. A living shadow and a man who exploded things in flashes of purple flame couldn't be the same person. 

 

"We'll set up a search party, then. You take two, I take two?" Sparks why did I suggest that, if I have to wander Portland without her….

 

Funtimes shook her head. 

 

"You're right. Safety in numbers." He tilted his head in the direction of Penumbra's retreat. "Let's follow." 

[Edgedancer]

What kind of good women doesn´t make your insides explode? Nighthound thought while his organs regenerated. The dinosaurs still fought with the woman. Granted, spectators might presume it to be a dance, with the woman twisting out of the way of the gigantic jaws trying to devour her and swiping dinosaur tails keeping her from using her lances to hit her assailants or moving herself away.

 

Lightwards wanted me to recruit Epics, didn´t he? I can do that, first time I ever held myself an Epic but I might as well start with an intriguing specimen.

 

Nighthound´s chuckle was drowned by a gulp of blood coming up his throat. Ignoring his still damaged organs he prompted himself up and rushed at the brawl.

 

The dancing Epic saw him approach and moved around, so that the dinosaurs obstructed his way. He slided between the dinosaur legs, causing his prey to push herself up and backwards from his position to increase the distance between them. Instead of moving after her Nighthound touched the Carnotaurus´ leg and gifted it his power. The surge of strength allowed it to ram the woman with its head and knock her out of the air.

 

With one swift movement Taurus pinned the woman on the ground face down. Careful not to squash her now, big boy. Nighthound crouched down in front of her.

“Lady, you don´t happen to currently search for employment, do you?” His voice was quite cheerful.

“Are you rusting kidding me?” The woman’s voice was still plenty defiant.

“Don´t worry, it´s a very serious offer and we are indeed searching for new employees. In fact your impressive performance persuaded me that I could use a personal assistant.”

 “I would still prefer you to storm of!”

Nighthound signaled his dinosaur to push on her harder and was rewarded with a pain filled scream. After that he grabbed her head and pulled it up until they were on eye level, meeting her scowl with a smile that was only friendly by his standards.  

“Let´s be honest here, I could easily kill you right now but I´m giving you a chance and it´s a better chance than you realize, because my personal disposition means I won´t outright kill you for that attitude of yours. I´m Nighthound. Tell me, who am I honoring?”

She looked down “Ray.”

Nighthound licked his lips. “Welcome, Ray, for your first job, you can replace the allosaurus you just killed and help me with claiming territory.”

 

He made the Carnotaurus release Ray and signaled his pets to follow him while he walked back to where he left the crowd. Hopefully he wouldn´t have to round them all up again. Making another Epic your Slontze is actually pretty satisfying, though it feels weird to not have the hound-shrouds on her. Maybe I should get her a collar, one way or another she´s going to be entertaining.

His new acquisition glared at him from behind.

[Edgedancer]

Voidgaze´s movement became more and more sluggish. Can´t breathe, I hate suffocating. The other Epic sneaked behind the shelves. Another dart shot at her and she only barely managed to raise her arm to block it.

 

Dragging herself to a light blue wall she used her sleeves to cut a hole into it. She pushed the fraction of the wall out and gasped for the air. Air, I´ll always love you. 

 

After turning her half limb body back around she could see the Epic that blows aim his blowgun at her. Sparks, come on move body. As he was drawing in breath something hit him in the face, throwing of his aim. In the doorframe stood Big Al, holding up McMuffins and glaring at her opponent.

 

This time he aimed for Al. Voidgaze tossed a sheet of paper towards the dart, keeping it from hitting Al. Still, she could already see his legs starting to wobble. I´ll have to deal with that guy quickly now. 

 

She heaved herself up and walked towards the attacker, she separated a string of cloth from one of her sleeves and moved it towards one of the knife shelves, in a way that caused her body to obscure it from the blower.

 

With her complete sleeve she started to drag Al towards the hole she cut into the wall and the other she threw at her opponent. He stepped back, avoiding the attack but losing his balance. Voidgaze pressed the attack, threw the string that connected to a knife forward and rammed it into his side. The enemy Epic staggered away, leaving a trail of blood behind him.

 

Taking care of Al comes first. Voidgaze carried him to her self-made hole and held him, so he could breath better. She herself could also use the fresh air.

“You know that that was pretty idiotic?” She asked him

“Nope.” He answered simply.

“Worst thing that could happen to me is that I resurrect but I´m certain you would have in fact died.”

“Maybe, but from how you talked dying still hurts. Sausage McMuffin?” He held one of them up and Voidgaze took it gingerly.

“I suppose you win this argument.” A cute idiot it is then.

[Mailliw73]

Altermind heard an explosion from behind him. Whirling, he saw no one. The explosive Epic had been walking towards the hallucination of torn apart bodies, but now looked back at the noise. "Boom, what are you doing? They're over here!" A voice yelled from behind the shelves. A bullet whizzed towards Psy-Fi, but he jumped out of the way just in time. Heightened reflexes sure could come in handy. Altermind gave the new man a hallucination of black. Just a black screen to blind him. The explosive Epic, Boom, squinted towards where the voice had come from, looking for what the voice had been talking about.

"They're dead over here, can't you see?" He called out.

"I can't see anymore," the voice cried.

Altermind suddenly heard a ticking like a countdown and dove to the ground. The voice chuckled, "It works every time."

Altermind began moving towards the voice, around a shelf. Noises of gunshots firing pierced the air. Altermind ducked and saw only a bullet or two. Many more shots must've been fired. He had heard them. Suddenly, a high pitched scream filled the air. Altermind covered his ears. This must be some noise Epic. This must be what it's like on the receiving end of my auditory hallucinations. Altermind thought. It wasn't a pleasant experience. He countered the shriek with his own auditory hallucination targeted at the man behind the shelf. The man's shriek cut off and he began slowly stepping backwards, eyes wide. He was hearing the sound of snakes slithering towards him, and with a black screen to block his vision, he had no idea where they were. He bumped into the shelf and jumped, startled from the noise. Altermind grinned and stood upright. He saw an arrow on the shelf near the Epic. He telepathically moved the arrow, positioning it on the man's throat and pushed it forward. The man collapsed. He gasped for his final breaths as he lay on the floor. Altermind pulled out his knife and thrust it into the Epic's chest, finishing him off.

The man ceased moving instantly. Altermind drew out his knife and cleaned it off with a rag he found on a shelf.

-------------------------------

Psy-Fi had stayed where he was when Altermind snuck off towards the other Epic. The explosive one soon met his eyes. Altermind must've forgotten about the hallucination he had given this man. Psy-Fi realized he'd have to fight this one on his own. He plucked an arrow off the shelf and drew his bow. The Epic tossed a fingernail clipping at him. Precog kicking in, Psy-Fi rolled to the side. He drew himself up on one knee and fired quickly. The arrow took the Epic in the knee. He roared in pain. Two more objects, bigger this time, were thrown at Psy-Fi. He leaped forwards, the only direction left, and drew his knife in his right hand, the bow in his left. The twin explosions were bigger than he had expected and the blast hit his back foot. With a quick intake of breath, he knew his foot had been burned. He stood, his weight on his other foot and prepared to stab the Epic.

--------------------------------

Electro had killed upwards of fifteen National Guardsmen. The Commander was dead, his wife and son as well, and the bus driver would die from the blood loss soon. Scorch was fighting the lady Epic with vines and plants. Electro decided it was time to check out the inside of this armory. Killing two more soldiers on his way, he dashed in the doors into a large, open room. A lady was sitting at the desk. "Hello there! Are you the Epic trying to take over?" She asked happily. Electro was confused at her optimism. Most people were frightened when their home was being overrun. She wasn't. He didn't answer her with words, but instead used his power cutter to cut the desk in half. It collapsed and she smiled at him. "Now, now, that was a nice desk. I liked that one," she said.

[Edgedancer]

After Big Al recovered his breath, Voidgaze told him to wait while she took care of the Epic, ensuring him that she would be fine. She grabbed a good couple of knives with her tassels and followed the blood trail down a corridor.

 

Ultimately, Voidgaze arrived at a door on which someone used poison green pain to write Blowgun to cover over a label saying Shooting Range. That´s it then, better finish this quick. He messed with me, he messed with Al, seems like I have all the motivation I need. She took one deep breath, held it, threw open the door and rushed in.

 

The Epic, Blowgun, sat collapsed against the wall on the other side of the room, multiple blowguns lined up before him. Voidgaze threw her sleeves forward and used them to pull herself forward with staggering speed.

 

Her opponent fired a couple of darts at her but she simply knocked them out of the air. With a couple of strides Voidgaze covered the distance and grabbed him with her sleeves, making sure to cover his mouth.

 

Blowgun struggled to get himself free, without success. With a cold stare Voidgaze lifted the tassels carrying the knifes and mercilessly rammed them into the captured Epic.

[Kobold King]

For the second time that day, a pterodactyl-drawn litter soared over downtown Portland. The city was more abuzz than it was before--Lightwards peered out from the litter to watch the tiny people below scurry from street to street, word of their new masters spreading far and wide. He was pleased to see a pair of large grey shapes moving between buildings; most likely Nighthound with two dinosaurs.

 

If he let one of my allosaurs get killed... Lightwards thought irritably. He never finished that thought.

 

From well below his litter, he caught a glimpse of a shadow rising up from an alley, twisting and moving like a living thing as it flew through the air and out onto the city streets. As quickly as it appeared it was gone again, but there was no mistaking it for a simple trick of the light. Its movement was too deliberate, almost predatory in its grace. Concerns about Purple Phoenix momentarily faded. There was yet another powerful Epic in the area. Calamity, how many others were there in this town?

 

The pterodactyls set down the litter not far from the alley he'd sighted the shadow coming from. Lightwards was not surprised to see Funtimes and Traveler standing in the alley with their ridiculous servants.

 

"You're right. Safety in numbers," Traveler was saying with a gesture. "Let's follow."

 

"Follow whom?" Lightwards growled, striding into the alley. The two raptors he'd brought along quickly sniffed out Purple Phoenix's bowler hat. Funtimes was holding it in her hands, looking uncharacteristically non-giggly.

 

The duo's rifle-sporting servant grunted. "Shadow Epic named Penumbra. Didn't you see that shadow?"

 

"Of course I saw it," snapped Lightwards. He glanced at the bowler hat in Funtimes' hands. "Did this Penumbra kill Purple Phoenix?"

 

He directed the question to Traveler, but the redneck spoke up again. "Don't know. He fell off your museum. Penumbra had his hat somehow."

 

How the Calamity has this man survived this long? Lightwards fumed internally. At least the unicyclist is quiet.

 

As if on cue, the Darth Vader blew out a couple of notes, causing his bagpipe to belch flames.

 

Mostly quiet.

 

His raptors began glaring at the redneck intimidatingly, allowing Lightwards to finally speak without the moron hijacking the conversation.

 

"Purple Phoenix left active explosives hidden in the Museum," he informed his allies. "He left his dinosar behind. We need to figure out what the sparks is going on with that man."

 

That, or we need a better screening process for our allies.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

To say there were no smart-mouthed servants in Newcago would be inaccurate. They certainly existed, but never for long. As Nathan's new servant answered Lightwards with increasing impudence, he was torn between frantic anger at the man's stupidity and awe at his bravery.

"What was your name?" Nathan asked quickly, before the two raptors could latch onto the next thing he said.

"Remington Springfield," he growled.

"I won't forget that," Nathan said. A man named for two different kinds of rifle would be difficult to forget.

And so would two different facts from two different sources regarding Purple Phoenix. If Nathan didn't share Penumbra's words, he could tip his own hand; but if Phoenix had rigged the museum with explosives, he couldn't be trustworthy.

As he was debating his choices, wearing his finest poker face, Funtimes grinned. "Then his beard is still okay!"

"I don't think that's the thing we need to be worried about--" Nathan began, but she leaped ahead.

"Penumbra the Dummyface knew him."

"He might know where he went," Nathan added. Although, if interrogated, Penumbra could spill a juicy detail that might cast suspicion on him.... "And we were about to track him down before you so rudely interrupted us."

[Voidus]

Purple Phoenix walked towards the flickering lights, even if they were likely to make his headache worse he'd need to meet up with the insane Epic couple sooner or later, he wasn't going to be able to get back up to the museum without the teleporter, and he'd lost all of his prepared ammunition so he'd need some time to create some more before he'd be able to hold off any rivals.
He searched through his pockets to find that while his pebbles were all gone the rest of the contents of his pockets were remarkably intact considering he'd just fallen several hundred feet and then exploded. Now if he could just find his hat...
You almost died and all you can think about is your hat? His Voice piped up at last.
"Why didn't you answer before?, and wait did you read my mind? Why didn't you tell me before I keep talking to myself!"
I was a bit... tired, I don't really know how I can even be tired but it's probably something to do with the fall.
For the first time since he'd heard the Voice, Purple Phoenix wondered what it actually was, at first he'd assumed it was a part of his Epic powers and then he'd kind of just gotten used to it.
Amazing what you can get used to isn't it? The Voice asked The mind is such a wonderful thing, so great at protecting itself.
The Voice said that like it should have some kind of special meaning but nothing clicked with Purple Phoenix.
"So wait, can you always read my thoughts or should I keep talking" He mumbled as he neared the figures ahead holding onto some flickering lanterns.
Not always, sometimes your thoughts are a bit hard to follow. The Voice replied.
"Probably because you're so insane" he muttered back.
The voice just laughed, another one of it's annoying habits.
Finally reaching the figures he noticed that Lightwards was with them as well as a number of other... was that man riding a unicycle? and bagpipes? what the? Why could these people never find normal people to interact with?
"Hello again, anyone seen my hat?" he said.

 

[Matrim Bloody Cauthon]

Psy-fi didnt bother stabbing the explosion epic. As the epic bent down to grab another item Psy-fi just picked up something and threw it underhand. The epic spun preparing to throw, the shoe that Psy-fi threw hit the fishing reel in the other epics hand detonating it. Psy fi turned and walked away.

[Voidus]

The insane woman released Purple Phoenix almost as quickly as she'd run up and hugged him. Placing her hands on her hips she gave him a stern glare.
"You singed your beard!" she said.
"Hmm? Oh yes I suppose I did, small mishap, forgot that I was carrying explosives when I fell." Purple Phoenix replied.
He glanced behind her to see her partner in a conversation with a man in a tank top who was holding a rifle and gesturing towards Purple Phoenix. What was going on there? And it seemed they'd caught up with Lightwards who was standing nearby, giving Purple Phoenix a stern glare of his own and looking rather angry about something.
Probably annoyed we forgot Falcon. His Voice chimed in, it was going to be very disconcerting to have it reading his thoughts all the time.
"So yes, picked up some followers have we? Sorry I couldn't join sooner, my powers aren't really suited for flight." he spoke up again, addressing them all.
"I probably wouldn't have made it down at all if that sparking Coelophysis hadn't knocked me out of the museum, now my hat?" he asked again.
Let's just hope they don't ask why we survived. Come to that, how did we survive?
"Reincarnation, you idiot" he whispered back.
"Why else would all my clothes still be intact after being blown up?"
I really don't like this. And stop whispering, they're going to notice and wonder what you're doing, just try to think clear and simple thoughts.
Yes, this was definitely going to get annoying.

[Kobold King]

"He might know where he went," the Traveler said smoothly.  "And we were about to track him down before you so rudely interrupted us."

 

The raptors let out a hiss, sensing their master's irritation. Lightwards opened his mouth to retort, but a voice from the end of the alley cut him off.

 

"Hello again," said Purple Phoenix cheerfully. "Anyone seen my hat?"

 

Lightwards took a few angry steps toward the man, but Funtimes rushed past  him with an enormous smile stretched across her face. "You're here! You're here and you're okay and you didn't blow up and I have your hat and you—"

 

She paused, her hands on her hips. "You singed your beard!" she admonished. Purple Phoenix smiled warmly and launched into an explanation.

 

"Hmm? Oh yes I suppose I did, small mishap, forgot that I was carrying explosives when I fell..."

 

Lightwards eyes nearly popped out from sheer rage when he heard the man's blatant admission of his explosives, but he forced himself to stay calm and keep listening. Maybe the man actually had a valid reason for placing the explosive.

 

More likely, the man would soon suffer a long and painful death for his betrayal. He'd let Nighthound do the worst of it, of course. Lightwards himself didn't want to be too close when the man started begging for death from a pool of his own blood...

 

Phoenix's voice dwindled to a low whisper, blending with the conspiratorial tones from Traveler and Springfield. There was something slightly off in the way they behaved. Lightwards frowned, temporarily distracted. Traveler acted as if he were one of the more vain and annoying Epics, but he was whispering to his servant with no trace of contempt or intimidating posture. If anything, it was the armed redneck that was the more contemptuous.

 

The realization hit Lightwards like a brick. Traveler treated his servant not like a pet like most Epics were prone to doing, but almost as an equal. There was only one possible reason for that. The two of them, in a sense, were equals.

 

Remington Springfield was a disguised Epic.

 

Feeling slightly more confident having discovered Traveler's little secret, Lightwards stepped forward to Purple Phoenix with a hostile smile on his face.

 

"What I wonder," the professor stated loudly. "Is why one of your explosives was lodged behind a wall tile back in the Museum. The way I see it, any explosives you carry on your person should stay on your person. Not hidden in strategic architectural points within your allies' headquarters."

[Voidus]

Purple Phoenix's internal conversation was interrupted as Lightwards strode forward, a horrific grin on his face, looking like he'd very much enjoy skinning something alive right then.
"What I wonder,is why one of your explosives was lodged behind a wall tile back in the Museum. The way I see it, any explosives you carry on your person should stay on your person. Not hidden in strategic architectural points within your allies'headquarters." he said as he neared.
What the sparks was the man talking about? He'd lost his explosives in the fall he hadn't left any in the museum, had he?
Ah, damnation. His voice sighed- how did it even do that? It didn't have lungs- I was hoping no one would find those, that was me I did it while you were passed out, thought it might be good to trap the base in case we were assaulted or needed to leave in a hurry.
Wait, what? The Voice did it? How?... 'while you were passed out', it couldn't have meant-
"YOU TOOK CONTROL OF MY BODY!?" He yelled without thinking, it was a split second after he finished that he realized he was shouting aloud, everyone in the alley was now looking at him.
Whoops

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

"YOU TOOK CONTROL OF MY BODY?"

Silence blanketed the alley. Nathan could only stare. Even the unicycle man had stopped circling, and the other two servants watched nervously. Only Remington seemed capable of movement: He chuckled, shook his head, and gave a low whistle.

Several looks flitted across Funtimes' face: confusion, horror, amusement, and finally worry. "I didn't do that," she said at last.

[Kobold King]

"YOU TOOK CONTROL OF MY BODY?"

 

All noise and motion of the alley stopped abruptly. The only sound to be heard were Lightwards feet stepping backwards and Remington Springfield chuckling to himself.

 

Lightwards retreated a few paces backwards, stuttering in confusion. "What? Me? I didn't--"

 

Even Funtimes the un-taken-aback-able was taken aback. Her face scrunched up through several different emotions, finally settling on a look of concern. "I didn't do that," she said slowly, her eyes fixed on the purple-wearing man.

 

Lightwards looked in quiet bewilderment at his associate. His eyes narrowed at Phoenix's suddenly self-conscious expression. The other Epic was either completely insane, or was willing to feign insanity to weasel his way out of uncomfortable questions.

 

No, Lightwards thought with a sudden fury. I put up with too much from these psychopaths I work with. Time to put my foot down.

 

In this case, putting his foot down meant putting his hand up and snapping his fingers.

 

One of the Deinonychus heard the snapping and leaped to Phoenix's side in a single lightning-fast bound. Before he could react, the raptor slashed one of his legs with its lethal claw, opening a blood-gushing gash just above the man's ankle. A red stain spread over the purple pants leg as Phoenix let out a brief cry of pain.

 

A lot of Epics had an almost unnatural quickness to their movements, but even Nighthound would have had difficulty matching a determined raptor when it came to swiftly executed acts of violence. Purple Phoenix was roughly shoved to the ground, a raptor claw by his throat in less time than it took to blink. Lightwards himself was a little surprised by the speed--he'd assumed the raptors would have moved more slowly, as he favored the theory of ectothermic saurischians. Clearly this implied a stable homeotherm...

 

Scholarly thoughts floated to the back of his mind as he approached the pinned Epic. Phoenix would likely blast the dinosaur to smithereens as soon as he realized what was going on, but Lightwards was determined to make himself heard before that happened.

 

"Listen to me, you slovenly bearded schizophrenic," he hissed, leaning into Phoenix's face. "Unexplained things are circling around you like vultures. If you have any intention of surviving this alliance in one piece, you had best start explaining them. Tell me everything you know about that shadow Epic. Tell me why you believe someone took over your body, if indeed that's what you believe. And tell me in clear terms why you planted explosives in my building."

 

He gave another smile, and the raptor pressed its foot onto Phoenix's neck slightly. "And if you answer me with crazed outbursts again, I will take you apart and put you back together as a much more cooperative person."

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles]

Nathan had his attention on Lightwards from the moment he sent the raptor to attack Phoenix. So absorbed was he in wondering if he would be the next recipient of the necromancer's wrath, that he didn't see Funtimes place herself between them until Lightwards' shirt had already turned to some sort of liquid. It soaked his coat and skin and let off a strong chemical smell.

"You hurt my friend," she said. Her arms were folded and she wore a smile, but it wasn't the one she paired with her usual vacant giggles. This one was deeper, smaller....and darker. "And you said you were my friend, but friends don't hurt friends."

Gasoline. Nathan recognized the smell now. She had turned his shirt to gasoline.

"Now," she said quietly, pulling a ribbon from her sweater, "I don't know anymore. If you're his friend, then you're mine, too, and I can turn your shirt into raspberry jelly and make you some toast. But if you're not..."

The ribbon became a sparkling purple lighter, which flared to light with a flick of her thumb.

"Are you my friend?"

Edited August 19, 2014 by TwiLyghtSansSparkles