The Battle for the Sandwich

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

2 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

SPACE??

SPACE!!

My enthusiasm renders you all paralyzed.

I said I wouldn't be here, but...

I show up and un-paralyse with my greater enthusiasm.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

6 hours ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

Well

I'm going to say that the fl part of the Drake Equation is low

Besides, Ganymede doesn't have any good energy sources

Just a weak magnetic field

Europa, which experiences more tidal forces than Ganymede, probably has hydrothermal vents.

Callisto has nothing though. It's outside Jupiter's radiation belt so there is no good outside energy to fuel a metabolic pathway.

Nice

Red Rising or The Black Prism?

The Black Prism!

 

6 hours ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

Clone shows up with his army of late-bronze-age soldiers and pulls out the Advanced Military card from Mega Empires. 

His Bronze Age soldiers decimate both armies.

While you're distracted by the battle, Kevin swoops down and grabs the Sandwich, then quickly jumps back into space and heads to Ganymede, where I've started a tavern by mining meteorites.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

7 minutes ago, Ink and Embers said:

The Black Prism!

 

While you're distracted by the battle, Kevin swoops down and grabs the Sandwich, then quickly jumps back into space and heads to Ganymede, where I've started a tavern by mining meteorites.

Nice

Clone grabs a mini-spin drive, puts some [REDACTED] into it, and zips off to Callisto, where he establishes another base. He names himself ArchGovernor of Callisto.

Oh and by the way ArchGovernors are from Red Rising. Completely different from Lightbringer, but sometimes confused because the 6th book of Red Rising is called Lightbringer.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

5 minutes ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

Nice

Clone grabs a mini-spin drive, puts some [REDACTED] into it, and zips off to Callisto, where he establishes another base. He names himself ArchGovernor of Callisto.

Oh and by the way ArchGovernors are from Red Rising. Completely different from Lightbringer, but sometimes confused because the 6th book of Red Rising is called Lightbringer.

Wow, that sounds very confusing. Thanks for the warning!

I'm starting to get faintly concerned about the ArchGovernor of Callisto, so try to organise a diplomatic meeting, apart from I forgot to tell Clone about this so I just show up. 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

2 minutes ago, Ink and Embers said:

Wow, that sounds very confusing. Thanks for the warning!

I'm starting to get faintly concerned about the ArchGovernor of Callisto, so try to organise a diplomatic meeting, apart from I forgot to tell Clone about this so I just show up. 

While you're headed there, Trout goes and becomes ArchGovernor of Titan.

"Why are you here?" Clone asks.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

1 minute ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

While you're headed there, Trout goes and becomes ArchGovernor of Titan.

"Why are you here?" Clone asks.

I'm alarmed at the rapid increase in the numbers of ArchGovernors. "I don't have enough Christmas cards!" I say, more in response to my thoughts than to Clone.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 minute ago, Ink and Embers said:

I'm alarmed at the rapid increase in the numbers of ArchGovernors. "I don't have enough Christmas cards!" I say, more in response to my thoughts than to Clone.

"There's supposed to be an ArchGovernor for every major sphere, so all the inner planets and the major moons."

The Maw 6 becomes ArchGovernor of Mercury.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

1 minute ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

"There's supposed to be an ArchGovernor for every major sphere, so all the inner planets and the major moons."

The Maw 6 becomes ArchGovernor of Mercury.

"So if I blasted 5 billion tonnes of water into space and it came to rest in a sphere shape, would there have to be an ArchGovernor of that, or have I misunderstood?"

I fly over to Mercury to pet Maw 6.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 minute ago, Ink and Embers said:

"So if I blasted 5 billion tonnes of water into space and it came to rest in a sphere shape, would there have to be an ArchGovernor of that, or have I misunderstood?"

I fly over to Mercury to pet Maw 6.

"I hadn't thought of that," Clone said. "But no, since you can't be an ArchGovernor if you have nothing to rule over. People don't live on water. Besides, 5 billion tonnes is not nearly enough. That much squared, and it would be heavy enough to count as a dwarf planet or major moon. Oh, and I'd forgotten - Ceres is meant to have a ArchGovernor too. In Red Rising, the other dwarf planets didn't have them since they hadn't been Terraformed yet, but nothing stops us here from giving someone Eris."

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

6 minutes ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

"I hadn't thought of that," Clone said. "But no, since you can't be an ArchGovernor if you have nothing to rule over. People don't live on water. Besides, 5 billion tonnes is not nearly enough. That much squared, and it would be heavy enough to count as a dwarf planet or major moon. Oh, and I'd forgotten - Ceres is meant to have a ArchGovernor too. In Red Rising, the other dwarf planets didn't have them since they hadn't been Terraformed yet, but nothing stops us here from giving someone Eris."

"Fair enough, only the only life on Ganymede is some tarigrades (I mispelt that) and that's it, so why does it count?"

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

4 minutes ago, Ink and Embers said:

"Fair enough, only the only life on Ganymede is some tarigrades (I mispelt that) and that's it, so why does it count?"

"Because people can move here. You can establish a population here." Clone paused. "The threads keeping the Battle for the Sandwich universe together are weak. It shouldn't take much effort to -" Clone gestured outside the window. The barren landscape of Callisto had transformed into a lush meadow. "- bring in all the Red Rising Terraformed  versions for all the claimed spheres. Mercury, Ganymede, Callisto and Titan are now fully Terraformed."

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

4 minutes ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

"Because people can move here. You can establish a population here." Clone paused. "The threads keeping the Battle for the Sandwich universe together are weak. It shouldn't take much effort to -" Clone gestured outside the window. The barren landscape of Callisto had transformed into a lush meadow. "- bring in all the Red Rising Terraformed  versions for all the claimed spheres. Mercury, Ganymede, Callisto and Titan are now fully Terraformed."

"Awesome! Thanks a lot!" I head back to Ganymede to establish a functioning space colony, stopping briefly at Earth to advertise it. Then I turn around, head back to Mercury, give Clone a Christmas card, and then actually go to Ganymede this time. 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

I twiddle my thumbs as I wait for the duel for the universe to begin. I order some of my guards to bring me the Sandwich and they quickly do so.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

4 minutes ago, Unitelligenius said:

I twiddle my thumbs as I wait for the duel for the universe to begin. I order some of my guards to bring me the Sandwich and they quickly do so.

Trout shows up and steals the Sandwich. "Would you like to be ArchGovernor of somewhere?"

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

5 hours ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

Trout shows up and steals the Sandwich. "Would you like to be ArchGovernor of somewhere?"

I'm very irritated at all the Sandwich theft, so pull a heist to steal the Sandwich and replace it with a Christmas card. 

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I am annoyed that you made a Christmas card and steal the Sandwich. I will send you my New Years card.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

20 minutes ago, Ookla the Intelligent said:

I am annoyed that you made a Christmas card and steal the Sandwich. I will send you my New Years card.

Clone asks if you want to become an ArchGovernor.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

On 12/23/2025 at 5:52 PM, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

Trout shows up and steals the Sandwich. "Would you like to be ArchGovernor of somewhere?"

I turn to Trout, "Sure that would be fun... where is somewhere by the way?"

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 hour ago, Unitelligenius said:

I turn to Trout, "Sure that would be fun... where is somewhere by the way?"

"It can be any of the inner planets, Ceres, or a major Gas Giant moon, or also the Moon. Mercury, Callisto and Ganymede are already taken."

[Unintelligenius he/him]

21 minutes ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

"It can be any of the inner planets, Ceres, or a major Gas Giant moon, or also the Moon. Mercury, Callisto and Ganymede are already taken."

"I'll take the Moon." I turn to summon a portal and grab the Sandwich out of it then turn back to Trout.

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

2 minutes ago, Unitelligenius said:

"I'll take the Moon." I turn to summon a portal and grab the Sandwich out of it then turn back to Trout.

Trout snapped his fingers, and the moon became fully terraformed.

"You now rule Luna," he said whilst grabbing the sandwich.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

57 minutes ago, Ookla the Wallfacer said:

Trout snapped his fingers, and the moon became fully terraformed.

"You now rule Luna," he said whilst grabbing the sandwich.

I quickly grab it back, thank him, and turn back to the duel waiting again for it to begin.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

7 hours ago, Ookla the Intelligent said:

I am annoyed that you made a Christmas card and steal the Sandwich. I will send you my New Years card.

I ask you where you got the New Year's card from, because it's splendid, thank you!

42 minutes ago, Unitelligenius said:

I quickly grab it back, thank him, and turn back to the duel waiting again for it to begin.

While you turn away, I grab the Sandwich as you're distracted by preparations for the duel. 

[Shatter He/Him]

My pigeon-god, Herr Federflugüberwachungsbehördenleiter von Hochdachfenstersims, politely asks for the duel to not happen as he is a good god. He'd like to get into retirement with a nice pension. He's a hardworking pigeon.

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

4 hours ago, Shatter said:

My pigeon-god, Herr Federflugüberwachungsbehördenleiter von Hochdachfenstersims, politely asks for the duel to not happen as he is a good god. He'd like to get into retirement with a nice pension. He's a hardworking pigeon.

...

Dear God Shatter