Sometimes, as now (I think), I don't know what I want. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed or get so and then I can no longer decide what I want, even if I could recently. Or perhaps it's more subtle and build-up than that but I have no clue!
I am rethinking my whole identity and everything I wanted or thought I did. I decided on growing my hair out but didn't quite know. Now I think it looks good how it is—not long but not really short. Would it look good long/er? Should I keep it as-is or whereabou
Do you ever see beauty in something mundane, random, or plain awful? There was an artwork once from someone young that I saw and I love it even though it would perhaps be considered poor in the general sense.
I've heard of - and experienced - something similar. I doodle here and there. Well, they are considered doodles by most, I'd say. They aren't too good, and when I redraw it later in more detail or a bit of a larger scale etc., then I see what others likely do. Until then, however, a sm
uhmmmdnn
very tried trigjr now...
tried to pres the newline return key thrice brfore thfoirjt time it elrked
ineed slepeo but csnt go to bed uet
my eyes are dropoing like they did earijer toddy i close them and think just one second and rhen so relieving and its hard to open them agsin. i understand. i feeel oke my eyelids srr very vmhesvy snbthey are eightingbon nen sndi and fona fsll ssleepep ammybe.
i know im eritnngincoherenellble but i tried reading the mhrhkd syiso
(Title of a song in case u don't know)
So, I recently thought on how I would love to have a friend that instead of just texting, we voice/video called. Or, just called for a mote general term. I've... never had friends I call. I've had a few (kinda) that I text, but I just imagine it must be nice to sometimes just talk to them and be able to have more fluidity outside the confines or texting, and be more natural and stuff... I mean it would be probably even better depending to talk i
It is (possibly) Wednesday, mon dudes!
On Feeling; or, Newfound Emotional Vividity
So..........
I think I might be out of my depression, or at least the worst of it. For now or for a bit, not sure. Or may still be in it. But it's eased up I believe. Yes. And there are good and bad feelings that come with that.
Firstly, newfound emotional vividity! Lol. Hopefully I used the right words but basically... I feel like I can actually *feel,* now. And the thing is, I can't ac
Perhaps it's from overthinking or thinking too much for too long (i.e., mental exhaustion). Perhaps it's related to the state of mind, like depression or something. Perhaps it's simply having expressed everything for that moment. Perhaps it doesn't matter- even though I seek to know everything about everything, the causes and reasons and what is related to what, or isn't, which I've been told/know is not necessary.
But, do you ever get the inability to think? Or to know what you are feeling
I don't know if I "should" do multiple entries right after another, let me know if this would better have been scheduled for later. Of course I can do what I want, yada-yada. Anyway...
So, some of these entries - including this one - are exploring thoughts/feelings/etc. I've experienced in the past and/or present, and likely already thought about or wrote about- even extensively. But, sometimes those were in forum posts, my mind, my journal, or through more abstract/metaphorical poetry or o
(NOT the title of a song or anything, this time)
Lately I've been thinking about a feeling I get and have made at least two attempts to explain it- I think first in my journal, and second to someone I know. It has perhaps no basis or manifestation in reality, but is present in my mind and causes overwhelm and a certain type of hopelessness. I hope someone will understand, and perhaps help me understand. Have you ever used a remote-controlled car, drone, etc., but you struggle to mane
(It's a title of a Linkin Park song)
So... I'm listening to The Emptiness Machine for the second separate time. First time(s) was months ago, I think it was suggested by @Honors Spectral Image, or someone? I've been craving music like Linkin for weeks.
Now, another song is on. Just shuffle- More the Victim now.
This all goes back to what happened a few weeks ago, and some temporary great people I met. There was one who loved Linkin and other music, and another who liked thi
