Hmm. Maybe Kal is still on the table then.
Could not have said it better myself. The qualities that separate them from the social norms on Roshar are what make them special, and those struggles they have, like Rlain being hated by both humans and singers is very much who he is, as he made those choices that led him to being an outcast on both sides, and that's what we want to see him overcome, gaining the respect of both Humans and Singers, to the point that he can date a human and people won't even bat an eye. Saying those personality traits keep him from having character is missing the point that those are his character traits, his struggles.
I can relate that every time BS confirms a character is autistic, I just sit there wondering what I missed, because for both Steris and Renarin, I viewed them as fairly normal people, even with the lists. I am fairly blind to this sort of thing, even in real life. I have a friend whose gay who I have been friends with for years, and he recently told me he was gay and I was surprised, and he was confused I was surprised because a lot of people seemed to find it obvious he was gay and that he had a lot of telltale signs, but whatever those signs are, they just go over my head. So I can never tell when a character is being written autistic because I always seem to see their behavior as normal, if a little quirky in regards to Steris' lists. Possibly because I myself am very abnormal, so abnormal is my normal? I have no idea, I just know I am blind to this.
Well, that's the thing that confuses me is that hasn't been a focus at all in the books. Rlain's outcast status has more to do with loyalties, similar to how someone betraying their people for another and how those people might be suspicious of him despite him giving them information. The fact they are gay is such a small factor that there are people who missed it who are not just me. What he is saying is a legitimate concern, you never want an author to focus too much on one trait only, I just don't think this announcement should've sparked that worry, as it is something said outside the book. If it wasn't for that confirmation, people would be split about whether or not they would be a thing. And like said above, how many 'isms' is too many?