Snakenaps

May I have a slot for Monday, November 23rd? May I please submit two chapters for 5,500 words if there is room? Otherwise, I will submit only the first chapter.

This is so cool!!! Thank you so much for sharing! I love the photos. What an incredible experience. You make me want to go!

Oh yeah, I'm giggling at that one. Totally agree there. I've seen theories that suggest that Mandalorian armor has the tech built into it to allow it to absorb kinetic energy...which mostly just sounds like excuses to make up for poor writing. They are on my To Be Read list! Exactly! I want a Thrawn show where I feel every moment a deep seated fear for the Rebel Alliance. That there is no way out magical solution and Thrawn just wipes the floor in his cold, calculating way. For someone who is a villain, I find myself rooting for him. I have a severe weakness for complex, highly intelligent baddies. Especially ones who love art, as an artist myself.

I think it depends on what you are expecting from Mando. If you are looking for an elegant, deep Star Wars story that hits emotionally, makes you question everything, and is a stunning work of writing...that isn't Mando. If you are okay with the Adventure-of-the-Week as Metal Dad and his starving Green Child explore the universe, make wacky friends, slaughter awesome beasts, and occasionally stumble upon a serious plot...buckle up. And honestly, right now, I will happily take the Child's weekly taste testing over a Game of Throne's level seriousness. Life is hard enough right now. I like having something warm-hearted to look forward to.

Can you imagine what Thrawn would be like if he was written excellently instead of just good? *shudder* I want the pain.

Google says you are correct. I have not decided if this means I should read the book or avoid it. Thrawn book was awesome. It led so well into Rebels.

It's hard not to. He's just the perfect blend of highly intelligent with no common sense meshed with smirky arrogance and topped off with a heap of wise-cracking adrenaline junkie. You get that for seven seasons and it is hard not to love the moron. Makes Revenge of the Sith even more tragic though. Ugh, my heart. My initial reaction was simply "AHHHHHHHHH!!!!" I am mad green with envy. That sounds spectacular. What was your favorite part?

Gimme. At least we got Bo-Katan played by her actual voice actor. I freaked out about that.

@karamel I'm pulling our Star Wars discussion over here I think what I love most about Star Wars - prequels, original, sequels, shows - is the fact that it is fun. Like, it is explosions in space with smack-talking droids and knights wielding laser swords while debating the meaning of honor. It's Kenobi saying, "Hello there" and Han saying, "I know" and Kylo Ren's pecs. It's the memes and cosplay and stunning fan art. But, ugh, when they decide to go full force with the feels, I bawl. I cried like I was at a funeral for Clone Wars. You are so right about Rebels and their compelling storylines. I am rewatching the show currently, and while it is often campy (I particularly love how quickly a lightsaber cuts through metal heavily depends on plot), it is so full of heart. A World Between Worlds was amazing. I love how they added to the mythos of Star Wars. And Morai! I loved that little detail with Ahsoka and am curious to see if the owl makes it into The Mandalorian. I loved the Loth cat easter egg. I am so pumped to watch the next episode of Mando. I hate waiting!!! And next week....eeeeeeeee...it can not come soon enough. If I ever met Filoni, I would shake that man's hand so hard. He's one of the main reasons I love Star Wars so much. Like, for me, the true Star Wars is Filoni. The care, love, and craftsmanship he puts into his work. Not the mention the easter eggs. My hero. Ventress. What a woman. I could never get enough of her either. She always reminded me of a viper. I think my biggest problem with Clone Wars was were there any bad characters? All the main characters have such incredible personalities and character arcs, even if it might have been bumpy at the beginning. That show never pulled its punches. It was so easy to fall in love with everyone on screen.

Bingo! One of the key elements of this group is the fact that we range so much in experience. It gives our critiques a more well-rounded view than a lot of groups. After all, you're a reader, right? Then even if you might not have the experience to say exactly why a book is good or bad on a technical level, I bet you know how to feel it. That counts for a lot. If you are here and willing to learn, I promise you there is a wealth of knowledge here. And I bet there is a lot you can teach us too. $5 if any of us wrote about animation wrong, you'd be able to tell us in a heartbeat. I'm kind of the horse gal here, for example. We all have our interests that extend beyond writing. Congratulations! Have you been using Maya? My sister is in visual effects and she has been using Maya and Z-Brush. 1) The Gentleman Bastard series rocks 2) Have you read Circe yet??? Is it any good? I read The Song of Achilles and the end made me cry. Dude, same. Are you watching The Mandalorian??? Favorite character? I'm a nut for Clone Wars. Absolutely adore Ahsoka and Maul, but I have always needed more Cad Bane. *Gasp* Us!? Nerds! Neeeeever... Welcome!!! Lovely to meet you too!

Don't lie to me, it's the cat photos. Oh, absolutely me too. I've seen /s be thrown around when someone is being sarcastic so that everyone knows it is sarcasm. I both like it because it makes things clear and hate it because it means my sarcasm isn't good enough to be obvious. I am pretty good at deadpanning in real life. My Latin teacher refused to let us eat in his class until we passed the Deadpan Challenge.

I'm pretty sure he was just explaining how he got here. If @Robinski was going to get offended, it would have been from all of my ribbing from the last year. I don't know how he puts up with me

Bring on the pain.

My pleasure, as always!

Good question. It depends on you. Me? I like to sit on any revised chapters. I want people to "cold read" or be unfamiliar with the work so they won't be biased. So if I ever decide to re-submit a chapter, I'll do it at least several weeks from the first submission. Considering I have a 40 chapter book I'm slowly submitting...if I decide to submit a revised version, it will be like a year since the first time people read that chapter. I just keep moving forward and put in the email any major changes I've made in the previous revised chapter that will affect the storyline moving forward. I also don't personally revise a chapter until I struggle to remember what people said about it (roughly two weeks) because otherwise I revise emotionally instead of objectively. Other people submit their revised version the week after the original. I personally find these harder to critique because I biased from what I know from the previous submission. If you think you might get stuck revising chapter one for weeks...yup, don't do this. Just move forward. Sending in revised chapters either way counts towards your submission limit of 5,000 words.

I was a part of this community for...what, six months before I finally read them? Then I found out my uncle owned the books and he loaned them to me. Inhaled them within days. My RoW is due to arrive at my parents' by Monday, so I'll get it on Friday! Didn't want to chance it getting stolen sent to my place.

This was new to this draft. Tempted to make it juicer but not so juicy it is cliche. This is...not something I have thought about before... Thank you @ginger_reckoning!

If you somehow mixed up your letters and meant Rhythm of War (RoW)...very soon. My copy is supposed to arrive anytime. If you meant WoR...I am not sure what you are referring to and need context clues.

Completely agree. It doesn't help that, IMO, I accidentally weakened Sue in this draft instead of strengthening her. Again, completely agree. I think once I have figured out what both the BK's government looks like as well as the previous one, I'll be able to nail down exactly when the Revolutionaries want. Thank you @Mandamon !

Two chapters up for your amusement this week. Violence warning on both, although minorly on the first.

Keep in mind, I never read the first Chapter One. So this will hopefully be informative for you. Prologue: Pg 1, "He lay underneath his fallen mount," Well, if he isn't dead yet, 1,200 lbs will definitely quicken the process. And that's if this is a lightweight horse. Warhorses weigh more. Pg 1, "but the strain was too much." If there's any consolation, you aren't moving a 1,200 lb deadweight horse without a pair of horses hitched up to drag it away anyway. Pg 1, "That would make the other voice…" Don't know who these two are, but I think they are Important with a capital I. Pg 2, "I will send someone," Lemme guess, that will end up being our protagonist for the rest of the book. Pg 3, "The skin was as smooth as a baby’s bottom." As much as this got a chuckle out of me, I feel like it took away from the seriousness of the event. Pg 3, "Why me?” Looks like we have our unlikely prophet? Pg 3, "“You will be the Hero these people need." I was incorrect. The end kind of lost me. Why A? Why chose him? I understand why he is emotional - I would be too if I thought I was going to die and then was saved by the gods - but it fell emotionally short for me. Chapter One V.2: Pg 1, "The Blade was burnished orange in color with a long, elegantly curved blade that was sharp on both sides." Repetitive. Pg 1, "A finely wrought chain hung in a coil at the hilt," A long one or a short one? Why would a sword (sword? maybe this is a dagger God of War style) have a chain and ball to one end? Seems like a tripping hazard. Pg 1, "had discovered the sword a few hours earlier," Like, where to do find one of these? I sincerely doubt it was just sitting by the edge of the road. Pg 1, "Never heard of a Smith with a dragonfly.” Confused? Does this reference a maker's mark? Pg 2, "First Meal" This makes me assume there are more than three meals a day and they are like hobbits with second breakfasts and elevenses. Pg 2, "He took off his cloak and pulled F." Hold up, the sword has a name now? Why was it behind his belt? Weird place for a sword. Pg 7, "No need to have people see you leaving town." I would personally be confused on why I would need to leave town. Like...some woman just killed his dad, a second woman just killed the first woman...and he is going to just...go with her? I feel like this is a pretty simple case of "My dad got murdered, I'm going to leave the local law enforcement to figure this out and stay with my friends." I'd trust his friends way before this random stranger who seems happy his dad is dead. Pg 7, "She was not giving him very much information." Yeah, which is why I would not trust a random murdering lady to take me on a field trip to who-knows-where. Pg 8, "we will find the way." What way? What goal are they trying to reach? At this point, I'm just confused. Also...no mourning for dad besides peeing the pants? Pg 8, "went to find his friends." As he should have done straightaway. I am going to echo this. Also, unless explicitly mentioned, I am assuming this is the go-to Medieval England setting. If it isn't...might want to mention something. Yes, I have to agree. I felt like every sentence was introducing me to something new without a full explanation (or any at all), and I didn't have time to digest. It was a trifle overwhelming. You killed a horse right off the bat which makes me sad, but you write snappy action scenes, which is awesome. Keep writing!

Oooooh!!! This is so cool! I had a lot of fun going to the website and reading the answers to these questions myself.

I'm going to ditto this and say I have sketchbooks worth of drawings and doodles as well as several thousand photos saved on Pinterest. I have nearly 800 for my unicorn character, the BK, alone.

I won't lie...this particular version of NotK was actually a reaction of me being exhausted by Game of Thrones. I didn't want an orphaned farm boy or the orphaned street rat or the gorey, depressing mess that had become so popular. Mobile won't let me write under the quote I pulled for some reason below. I am hoping that both Ir's political skills and my own will grow together until Book 3 is a rip-roaring good time. I would love to have her progress from "I have no clue what is going on but I'll do my best" to "I'm the one calling the shots here, get out of my way... please." I think Ir, as the books progress, will harden, but she'll always want to do good. She won't go the route of Breaking Bad.

I've wondered if I should have written the book from his POV only, but, honestly, with my current skills, I would struggle with this. It would up the political intrigue far beyond my current abilities/knowledge. I've considered writing a prequel about his past more than once. It may be that this book falls short from It's POV, and maybe one day (either when the book is a success or a trunk novel), I'll rewrite it from the BK's POV only. But right now, I don't feel like I know enough to pull off a book of that caliber. I'm barely making it with this one.