Perhaps that might be more relatable, however in terms of being dark Dalinar at the rift is far beyond anything Shallan has.
And Shallan's misses it's mark for me and many others.
In terms of relatability as you like it so much 1 in 4 people have depression, so Kaladin is very much not whinny and I'm tired of hearing that, have you any idea what it is like to wonder if ceasing to exsist might be preferable to what you see in the future? Because I can(note I never considered suicide, but I did wonder if nonexistence might be better than even the best future I saw.)
As to bigotry I'm tired of that accusation as well, at the time every lighteyed that Kal had known had betrayed him in some fashion, was a slave bigoted for thinking all whites where awful? No, no one thinks that. In modern times that would be different as we have internet and more movement of people to give evidence to the contrary, but back then no.
Being an idiot? From what? He made the parshendi armor, got the knobweed sap and made bridge 4 the best bridgecrew in the whole army. What did he do that was stupid?
Shallan in the chasms was one of the worst parts of the book. Kaladin saving Elhokar had nothing to do with her,so stop saying it. It was the right thing to do and he knew that, and yes it was epic.