Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 22 Posted January 22 1 minute ago, Hmmm lies said: ...sounds a little eggy to me (i basically had this same thought) I don't think so. He often gets kind of annoyed whenever we mention that he might be any kind of queer. 1
Hmmm lies she/her Posted January 22 Posted January 22 1 minute ago, Akimikoisthecutest said: I don't think so. He often gets kind of annoyed whenever we mention that he might be any kind of queer. Ok yeah, I wouldn't pressure anything, but it's still possible. 1
Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 22 Posted January 22 6 minutes ago, Hmmm lies said: Ok yeah, I wouldn't pressure anything, but it's still possible. Yeah. I really wanted to say something, but I didn't
Usseewa Posted January 22 Posted January 22 Guys i think this might be me https://zinniajones.medium.com/depersonalization-in-gender-dysphoria-widespread-and-widely-unrecognized-baaac395bcb0
Hmmm lies she/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 3 hours ago, Theory said: Guys i think this might be me https://zinniajones.medium.com/depersonalization-in-gender-dysphoria-widespread-and-widely-unrecognized-baaac395bcb0 I kinda felt like this as an egg, I don't remember too much of how that particular part felt tho
KnightSkye Reforged They/Them Posted January 23 Posted January 23 I missed like 5 pages what happened?
Honors Spectral Image She/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 3 hours ago, Theory said: Guys i think this might be me https://zinniajones.medium.com/depersonalization-in-gender-dysphoria-widespread-and-widely-unrecognized-baaac395bcb0 Feeling split into two parts, with one going through the motions of participating in the world and one observing quietly: “There is this body that walks around and somebody else just watches” this point is one I def feel, like 24/7
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 I don't like to think of myself as a split between multiple parts because I don't think it helps with being able to move forward (but that's a personal thing) I'd be more likely to just be upset that I was in a body that didn't really fit me and then blame myself for that.
Usseewa Posted January 23 Posted January 23 I was also talking about the other stuff like feeling...emotionless? But not really. Idk. And stuff. Yeah. I didn't really feel the split part.
Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 23 Posted January 23 49 minutes ago, Honors Ghost said: this point is one I def feel, like 24/7 Yeah me too. It feels like I'm acting in a play and having to put on a persona every day, all day 2
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 7 minutes ago, Theory said: I was also talking about the other stuff like feeling...emotionless? But not really. Idk. And stuff. Yeah. I didn't really feel the split part. It feels like a reach for me to say I didn't feel emotions or whatever. I will say, however, that I do reflexively have dialogues with myself (as much as I try not to) but I'd attribute it to other issues. Idk I can admit I grew up for sixteen years as a cisgender guy, and I can admit that was me. Maybe that changes some things.
Honors Spectral Image She/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 4 minutes ago, Akimikoisthecutest said: Yeah me too. It feels like I'm acting in a play and having to put on a persona every day, all day Yay that exactly describes it
Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 23 Posted January 23 Just now, Honors Ghost said: Yay that exactly describes it Speaking of plays, I helped run auditions today! I didn't audition though :(
Honors Spectral Image She/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 Just now, Akimikoisthecutest said: Speaking of plays, I helped run auditions today! I didn't audition though :( That’s still pretty fun! What show?
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 1 minute ago, Akimikoisthecutest said: Speaking of plays, I helped run auditions today! I didn't audition though :( Auditions!
Usseewa Posted January 23 Posted January 23 (edited) 23 minutes ago, Akimikoisthecutest said: Yeah me too. It feels like I'm acting in a play and having to put on a persona every day, all day That is perhaps me idk 18 minutes ago, Aeoryi said: It feels like a reach for me to say I didn't feel emotions or whatever. I will say, however, that I do reflexively have dialogues with myself (as much as I try not to) but I'd attribute it to other issues. Idk I can admit I grew up for sixteen years as a cisgender guy, and I can admit that was me. Maybe that changes some things. It's not emotionless idk how to describe it... It's like feeling idk not excited sometimes or just feeling bleh the 24/7 except sometimes And also yes I definitely have an inner dialogue. I mean like idk i cant describe it I'd need more time and to think about it and formulate it but did yall read the whole thing (or most)? Like the part where it has a bunch of reddit quotes and stuff of what ppl felt? Edited January 23 by Theory
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 17 minutes ago, Theory said: but did yall read the whole thing (or most)? Like the part where it has a bunch of reddit quotes and stuff of what ppl felt? I read it yeah 17 minutes ago, Theory said: It's not emotionless idk how to describe it... It's like feeling idk not excited sometimes or just feeling bleh the 24/7 except sometimes And also yes I definitely have an inner dialogue. I was a very vibrant child and I had tons of energy and I was like super ordinary and everything But you're always allowed to change, right? I mean there were lots of signs that I was an egg in my childhood from like, grade seven onwards. I'd say I was probably happiest at a young age. To say that there's like a element of depersonalization I think is just untrue for me. As for like feeling emotionless or emotionally apathetic I don't know if that's the case. Like I've definitely felt depressed but idk don't think that's dysphoria Dang now that I write that out it sounds like I have no dysphoria
Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 23 Posted January 23 39 minutes ago, Honors Ghost said: That’s still pretty fun! What show? Matilda
Hmmm lies she/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 Uh yeah I felt a lot less emotional as an egg. Like stuff didn't 'really' matter to me. I was less of a real person, it felt like. Weird and hard to describe I guess. 3
Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 23 Posted January 23 (edited) 5 minutes ago, Hmmm lies said: Uh yeah I felt a lot less emotional as an egg. Like stuff didn't 'really' matter to me. I was less of a real person, it felt like. Weird and hard to describe I guess. Yeah. When you crack your egg it's like in the Wizard of Oz, when Dorothy arrives in Oz and it's all technicolor Edited January 23 by Akimikoisthecutest
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 3 minutes ago, Hmmm lies said: Uh yeah I felt a lot less emotional as an egg. Like stuff didn't 'really' matter to me. I was less of a real person, it felt like. Weird and hard to describe I guess. if I can ask, what do you mean by 'I was less of a real person'? I definitely felt like things mattered less and less to me over time but like things still mattered somewhat, just the things I valued changed 5 minutes ago, Akimikoisthecutest said: Matilda Like the one with the girl and the water?
Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 23 Posted January 23 Just now, Aeoryi said: Like the one with the girl and the water? yep! I'm running sound for the show
Honors Spectral Image She/her Posted January 23 Posted January 23 5 minutes ago, Akimikoisthecutest said: Matilda OMG I LOVE THAT SHOWWW 5 minutes ago, Hmmm lies said: Uh yeah I felt a lot less emotional as an egg. Like stuff didn't 'really' matter to me. I was less of a real person, it felt like. Weird and hard to describe I guess. Yes. Just now, Akimikoisthecutest said: yep! I'm running sound for the show That’s awesome I’ve always wanted to run tech someday
Usseewa Posted January 23 Posted January 23 7 minutes ago, Aeoryi said: I read it yeah I was a very vibrant child and I had tons of energy and I was like super ordinary and everything But you're always allowed to change, right? I mean there were lots of signs that I was an egg in my childhood from like, grade seven onwards. I'd say I was probably happiest at a young age. To say that there's like a element of depersonalization I think is just untrue for me. As for like feeling emotionless or emotionally apathetic I don't know if that's the case. Like I've definitely felt depressed but idk don't think that's dysphoria Dang now that I write that out it sounds like I have no dysphoria Spoiler I was never happy 4 minutes ago, Hmmm lies said: Uh yeah I felt a lot less emotional as an egg. Like stuff didn't 'really' matter to me. I was less of a real person, it felt like. Weird and hard to describe I guess. Same.
Akimikoisthecutest Posted January 23 Posted January 23 Just now, Honors Ghost said: That’s awesome I’ve always wanted to run tech someday Why haven't you? I love sound, but our mics suck so it's mostly just stress and praying to Tina that everything works. Also our school is old and decrepit and nothing in the auditorium works
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