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Posted

BRANDON SANDERSON IS BEING SUED FOR MASS MURDER BY KALADIN, HARMONY, AND THE KOLOSS WERE PEOPLE TOO FOUNDATION!!!

DEFEND HIM, OR CONDEMN HIM

Welcome to the court of the cosmere, with Adonalism presiding. Brandon sanderson is being tried for character brutalization, with the suggested sentence of having to let us all read Stormlight Four drafts.

 

*The offence takes the stand*

[Kaladin]

Tukks. Dead. Nelda. Dead. Goshel. Dead. Dallet: Dead. Cenn, Maps, Dunny: All Dead. Moash-Living... STORMS, WHAT WILL IT TAKE TO KILL THAT SON OF A KOLOSS!!!

[Representative of the "koloss were people too foundation"]

Over TEN BILLION KOLOSS were brutalized and killed during the fall of the final empire, as there minds were hijacked and there bodys used as weapons.

[Harmony]

Brandon Sanderson has killed to many characters. He must be tried for his crimes. Witnesses, as readers of these books you have a firsthand knowledge of Brandon Sanderson's character brutalization. You may now speak.

Posted

Ham: This is a very interesting philosophical question you pose. Have you given serious thought to all the implications of putting one's own creator on trial? I have some musings I'd like to share if you have two or three hours...

Posted (edited)

[Harmony]

Hammond, we all love your philosophy debates, but this man killed Clubs. And Kelsier. AND Vin. 

[Random Sharder]

I want to hear!

[Adonalism]

You are banned from the courtroom!

Edited by ShardShaper
Posted

I feel as though this suggestion is rather like putting time on trial for the deaths of every person who has died of old age.

Posted (edited)

Time has no choice. Would it kill sanderson to let Kaladin be happy for ten minutes?

Also, he didn't need to kill all the koloss. They were people too. 

Edited by ShardShaper
Posted
3 minutes ago, ShardShaper said:

Does any murderer consider his victims deaths unnecessary? 

Irrelevant. Mr. Sanderson created these characters; they are his to do with as he sees fit, regardless of the opinion of your clients.

Posted

I was just pointing out the fact that Mr. Sanderson is not a murderer. Just because you think the deaths were unjustified does not mean that they were. Your opinion is not fact.

Posted

He is here on charges of character brutalization though, not murder.

30 minutes ago, Dr. Dapper said:

Mr. Sanderson created these characters; they are his to do with as he sees fit, regardless of the opinion of your clients.

So can a parent kill his children if they wish? 

Posted
6 minutes ago, ShardShaper said:

He is here on charges of character brutalization though, not murder.

So can a parent kill his children if they wish? 

Is a child a creation of their parents or a consequence of their actions? I would argue the latter. Parents do not get to decide the appearance, beliefs, actions or thoughts of their child. Mr. Sanderson controls all those in regards to his characters. If anything, the comparison between parent and child is extremely lacking in this regard. Mr. Sanderson's characters would be better understood as extensions of his own existence than existing entities of their own.

Posted (edited)

Listen guys, we can't hold the artist responsible for the brutalization of some of the artwork(so long as said artwork is not alive, or at least not aware/sentient) in the scheme of the greater art! Their sacrifice is necessary for the story to succeed, as light is defined by darkness, so too does their pain give way to beauty....

*reads what the sentence for the crime is........*

Mr. Sanderson must be held fully accountable for his crimes, and his sentence carried out post haste!!

Edited by Wandering Investor
Added sentience exclusion to artwork brutalization..
Posted

Um?  Isn't this kind of like putting God on trail?  Sanderson does the best he can.

Posted
1 minute ago, Karger said:

Um?  Isn't this kind of like putting God on trail?  Sanderson does the best he can.

I mean, that is the premise of the movie "God of Trial" which is rather good.

Posted

In brutality he brutalizes himself, as his art is an extension of his own will and imagination. As well put someone on trial for suicide.

Posted
1 hour ago, Karger said:

Um?  Isn't this kind of like putting God on trail?  Sanderson does the best he can.

[David]

Agreed! This is like slicing a potato with an apple slicer!

Posted
15 minutes ago, ShardShaper said:

[Kaladin] 

OBJECTION! David is not a cosmere character, and can not testify in cosmere court. 

[Adonalsium

Objection Sustained. Call your next witness.

 

Posted
1 minute ago, Nathrangking said:

[Adonalsium

Objection Sustained. Call your next witness.

 

Objection!

Based on the ruling by Adonalsium that a non-cosmere character can not be a witness for this trial, Brandon Sanderson cannot be tried for crimes within the Cosmere, as he is not a Cosmere character. Therefore this must be declared a mistrial.

Posted
Just now, ShardShaper said:

OBJECTION!

Sanderson is not a witness.  0rFKCWU.gif   6tU3gRQ.gif

And yet, he has a right to a trial by his peers. If a non-cosmere character cannot be considered a peer so as to stand witness, how can you argue that any of this trial qualifies as such to him?

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